The Purple Heart
by Svaler
Summary: Nominated for Top 10 fics completed in October. Talkative Nurse Alice Brandon is a natural with helping injured soldiers, even if they are the enemy. She mumbled, "If you call my life pathetic, why try and save it?" He replied in a hard voice, "It would be, if you died now. During this war. But you won't. I refuse it. Suicide is not a noble way to go, America." AH. AB/JH
1. How to Save a Life

_**Disclaimer:**_ All characters in this chapter and all the following don't belong to me.

 ** _A/N_ : **Chapters will be short. All titles are inspires by a song.

Enjoy reading.

* * *

 _ **Chapter One  
How to Save a Life **_

It was a freezing January the first, 1945. Alice and Jacob were walking side by side, as did Edward and Bella. They were patrolling the Berlin ground for any survivors after the attacks had subsided. It was uncommon for women to walk along with the soldiers on such missions. As it happened, Alice and Bella wanted to help out in the field and save more lives, rather than to sit at the safe camp until their men returned with the wounded. By then it was often too late for any life saving work.

"It's strange, isn't it?" Jacob asked, gazing at the dark sky. "No fireworks. Except explosions."

"I don't like it," Edward said. "We've come too fare. The bombs must be near."

"Let's head back to our camp," Jacob said. "Perhaps the others have had more luck."

Bella turned her worried eyes around their surroundings.

"Hush, I heard something!" she whispered, her eyes searching in the woods.

Both men pulled out their guns. The girls gripped their backpacks tightly, which were filled with their medical supplies. Their clothes were the perfect camouflage, but they needed to stay alert, all four of them.

"Close by?" Edward asked, standing before Bella as if to protect her.

Bella tried to find the source, but thought maybe she'd mistaken what she'd heard for the bombs in the distance. Before Bella could voice her thoughts, Alice shrieked upon seeing two soldiers coming at them fast, handguns up. Those soldiers were both big, bigger than her own men and they were pointing the deadly ends of those guns at Edward and Jacob. Both her men turned to the strangers just in time. Shots filled the air.

"No!" Alice roared when Edward fell to the ground, his lifeless eyes staring ahead of him.

Bella let out a tortured scream, fell on her knees and stumbled face forward on the ground. At first, Alice thought Bella screamed like that, because her lover was now a fallen soldier. Upon looking better, Alice saw blood on Bella's neck. It was a lethal place to strike. Alice thought of helping her, but she was frozen in her spot.

Her dearest friend Bella had been right about hearing something, but unfortunately not in time. That's what Alice thought before she saw Bella's eyes go void of all life.

Time stopped when Alice saw her fiancée. Jacob was on his knees, grunting and probably in pain. He was shot. Despite that, he had his right arm uplifted with his gun pointed at one of the strangers.

The second stranger was dead on the ground. If it made Alice a bad person or not, she thanked her God for that.

Jacob was the best soldier in her entire team for his perfect aim. He'd shoot that stranger dead. Alice waited for the stranger - who seemed unharmed as he stood straight and tall, both hands holding unto his gun - to die.

Her small body jerked when one shot deafened her momentarily and her eyes remained on the stranger. He had to fall. Jacob's bullet had to pierce his chest and stop his heart or defect any other organs, so he would die. The enemy was supposed to fall.

From the corner of her eye, she saw Jacob slump down. He no longer moved.

The stranger turned his arm to Alice and she swore that a part of her soul died. She couldn't turn her head to see what was just a few feet away from her - Jacob's dead body. If she could force her eyes away, she could pretend it wasn't true. Maybe he was still alive. But she couldn't risk seeing something else entirely in Jacob's eyes.

Watching anything else was more bearable than turning her head to Jacob. Even if that meant she had her eyes on the stranger. His gun was pointed in her direction. Her eyes shifted and she stepped away in fright when she saw an emblem on his left upper arm. It was a swastika.

He was with Nazi Germany.

Her entire body froze as she thought of what she'd gotten into. With no guns, knives or the knowledge of how to use them, Alice felt hopeless. She didn't want to leave Jacob, Edward and Bella on the freezing ground, but she couldn't wait for the stranger to kill her either. Her friends wouldn't want that and neither would her God. Therefore, she ran. She was a fairly good runner, always had been, despite her short legs.

Today she was having trouble with her speed. The backpack felt twice as heavy. She thought of throwing it off her back, but she feared that would momentarily slow her sprint. Also, her feet just weren't doing what they were supposed to be doing. Her lungs refused to feel the oxygen which she was breathing in so hard, that it gave her a horrible feel of a choke in her throat. Her eyes couldn't forget what she'd seen happen. The image was freshly painted behind her eyes. First Edward, then Bella and at last Jacob had been killed by two Nazi's. Very possibly, Alice was next. It was not strange that Alice had trouble with her speed. For whatever it was worth, Edward or Jacob had killed at least one of them. That made the world a slightly better place.

As she ran, there was the unmistakable sound of someone running after her. She tried to speed, but the sound behind her kept getting louder. The Nazi was running after her. She needn't turn her head to know it was him. He had a gun. Surely he still had bullets. The best way to kill her was to shoot. The Nazi did shoot Jacob from quite the distance, so Alice knew that he had an impeccable aim.

When no shots filled the air, Alice fought hard against the burn in her lungs. He wasn't trying to kill her or he was, but his bullets ran out. She remembered the second stranger, the dead one. He was the Nazi's friend of course. She had no doubt that he was now pissed. Possibly, he was going to direct that anger to her. That's when Alice saw a disturbing image of herself, beaten, used and hurt.

Her vision was too blurry. The race wasn't a fair match up against the Nazi. She stumbled more times than she could count. His hands roughly caught her around the waist and pushed her on the ground, face first. Alice was on her hands and knees first. She felt his heavy body come on top of hers, forcing her chest unto the ground. Her knees and wrist ached from the sudden impact. All air left her body when his heavy knee or elbow or whatever it might have been pressed hard into her lower back to keep her down.

"Wer bist du?"

She shook her head, unable to know what to say. He spoke German. She couldn't speak that language, because she didn't know how. All she knew was that he sounded very angry.

"Hast du Wapens? Bist du allein?"

The angry tone continued. Alice was completely baffled, because he kept talking to her in that foreign language. Did he not see she wasn't a German soldier?

She couldn't communicate with him with her eyes, because hers were staring at the dirt on the ground. Her lower back was starting to ache badly now and she tried to shift.

"I-I'm an A-American," she breathed hurriedly, as if that could explain him something.

Her proud tone faded, making it sound like being an American was somewhat a shame.

The sharp pain in her back left and she felt him rip off her backpack. She thought he'd go rumble inside it to see what she carried. To her disappointment, he didn't. Instead he discarded the bag, twisted her around and held her tightly by the wrists, each one by the side of her head. To immobilize her even further, he sat down heavily on top of her legs. Of course, with her backpack on her back, he wouldn't have been able to pin her down like this. That explained why he'd yanked it off of her.

She wasn't strong at all, yet he still gripped her as if she possessed the strength of a two hundred pounds soldier. She watched him up and down in horror, fearing all the horrible things he could do to her. His abnormally huge frame was intimidating. If he wanted to, he could easily kill Alice with his bare hands.

The handgun was back in sight. His left hand remained on her right wrist, tightly squeezing it into the ground. He had the tip of the murder weapon pointed perfectly between Alice's eyes. He hadn't run out of bullets after all.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, assist me in my last agony."

Her voice was barely a whisper. Tears fell from her eyes, rolling past the sides of her cheeks. She shifted her eyes from the weapon to the Nazi.

Just like Jacob's, his eyes were green. She sobbed when she remembered her dead fiancée so unexpectedly.

"Wapens?"

The agonizing pain in her captured wrist subsided when he released her. Both her hands were now free. He tapped his left hand against his gun, still pointed at her.

Realizing that he was asking her something about _weapons_ , she shook her head just the tiniest bit. She had no weapons, she couldn't shoot one and she definitely didn't think she could kill a person. She was an army nurse. All she had was her backpack with medical supplies, which was now somewhere on her left side.

He tapped her collar with the tip of the gun. Alice flinched, thinking he was going to shoot her. Her eyes were tightly shut.

"Hey."

Her eyes opened instantly when he spoke. She caught a look of surprise on his face. He tapped her collar again, only this time with his left hand. She flinched for being touched by a Nazi.

"Kannst du mir helfen?"

As he spoke much slower this time, she heard a word that sounded an awful lot like help.

Again he tapped her and only when she looked down, she noticed her pin on the collar of her coat. It was a caduceus, which said at the top _United States Army_ and on the bottom _Medical Department._

She shifted her eyes back up, uncomfortably watching the weapon of death. Surely at any moment it would blast a bullet in her skull.

"Ich brauche deine Hilfe."

Again there was that word, but Alice couldn't be sure. She thought he was saying in his language that he wanted help, as the word he kept saying in German sounded like that. Perhaps he wanted medical help, since he'd tapped her pin. The caduceus was after all a universal sign for medicine.

Her eyes were staring at the gun instead. It moved all of a sudden. He was putting his gun back in its holder by his hip. It seemed like an illusion to see that happen - a Nazi putting away his gun before the enemy was dead.

"Deine," he said, pointing at her, "hilfe. Okay?"

Her breathing halted when he started pulling off his own large backpack. He placed it next to hers. She could feel her eyes widen in surprise. He kept watching her. In his eyes was a warning for her to not move. She couldn't, even if she wanted to. His heavy body still sat on top of her. He started to unbutton his coat and Alice whimpered. He was taking off his clothes, after saying he wanted her _help_. She would never give him _that_ kind of help.

"I'd rather be shot than violated, you filthy Nazi!"

His hand came on top of her lips and the gun instantly pressed into her cheek. The effect was instant. She silenced. This sight of him made her sick so she closed her eyes. More tears rolled down the sides of her cheeks.

"Halt die Klappe!" he whispered hurriedly.

She started pushing him away, but it was as if she had put her hands against a mountain. It hurt her hands more than it hurt the mountain.

"In Gottes Namen, was machst du?"

Her hands stopped pushing his rock hard chest. She gave up.

"Hey?"

It caused her wet eyes to snap open. His eyes went from hers to his stomach. Hers followed. His coat was open now, exposing a green sweater soaked in blood, especially around the lower abdomen. Her shocked eyes went up to his, only to find them already watching her carefully.

That tight press against her lips slowly disappeared as he withdrew his hand. He pushed himself away from her, so that he sat on her left, next to her bag. He waved the gun a little up, as if to motion for her to sit up. Or he might be reminding her of his power against her unarmed body.

His eyes narrowed when she didn't move. His left hand, palm up, came close to her right hand. She watched it strangely.

"Steh auf."

His hand touched hers, but she moved hers away. That hand was the cause of her friend's deaths. He retrieved his hand, but kept waiting.

Her numbed hands barely worked, but she pushed into the ground. Her aching body rose just a little, watching him in fright. At any moment, he might push her body back into the ground for doing something he didn't want her to do. He sat very still, only watching her with tight lips. When he didn't stop her, she pushed herself to rise just a little more, until she sat up. Even in seated positions, he was much bigger than her. His body was like a warning.

She looked at the blood on his clothes. He did want her medical help. He might even need it for survival.

He pulled up his sweater and a shirt he wore underneath. He winced when he made the movement, exposing the wound.

"Fick!" he hissed quietly.

She raised her eyes in shock, but only because it sounded surprisingly much like the F-word. The wound looked very painful. There was massive blood loss. Still he'd managed to run after her and catch her. He'd even stood on his legs with a gunshot wound, while it had brought Jacob down on his knees.

The sharp realization that this Nazi had been stronger and quicker than Jacob sickened her. She reminded herself that Jacob hadn't missed after all. Or maybe it'd been Edward who fired that shot. It didn't matter who shot the Nazi. She was still glad to see that torn flesh, pouring blood out of his body. She prayed to her God he would die. Soon after that, she asked for His holy forgiveness for such wicked thoughts. It was true nevertheless. She'd rather he bled to death than help him. She'd rather he died from a painful infection.

Yes, this gunshot wound could kill him easily. His breathing was already labored.

"Hilf mir, bitte."


	2. Stitches

_**Chapter Two  
Stitches**_

Before they'd gone patrolling, the men had given both Alice and Bella a satellite telephone. She only needed to find a way to take it out of her pants pockets, make the call and hope someone would come and find her.

The German language was so jumbled up, but if Alice paid close attention, she could make out some similarities with the American language. She heard two similar words, sounding much like help me. But he'd said one more thing. Perhaps it was a threat, although his eyes seemed pleading.

"Don't look at me like that..."

Her eyes dropped to the ground, but that could not make her ears go dead to his shallow breaths come in and out. The pain and loss of blood were taking its toll on him.

She snapped her head up when she noticed movement. He started pushing himself to a tree only a few feet away from him. Alice looked at her surroundings. During her run she'd turned into this strange forest, though most trees seemed dead. It was a miracle she'd dodges them.

With slow and deliberate movements, the wounded Nazi leaned against the tree and let out a loud grunt. She guessed he'd made some wrong movement. Alice stared at the trail of blood, about two yards long. The trail was very thick and moist, proving Alice once again his condition was critical. He was bleeding out. They looked at each other. Her eyes kept shifting from his bright green eyes to the bleeding wound. He was dying and she could prevent.

"No! Don't remind me of the Florence Nightingale Pledge!"

He scoffed at her, probably wondering what she was saying all of a sudden in such an irritated tone. On the other hand, Alice knew that he hadn't said a thing. Still, something reminded her of the pledge she'd taken.

His eyes slowly shut. She grabbed her backpack and crawled to him quickly, careful not to touch the blood in the sand.

"You're a murderer. But I'm not! I'm going to help you."

The reluctance in her voice was something she could not hide. His eyes did not open.

"Hey!"

Only then did he crack them open to keep at her. His eyes seemed to ask her what she wanted from him.

"If you point that gun at me again, I'm going to stop. I mean it."

She glanced at the oozing wound on his stomach. It was black around the edges from the gunpowder. The bleeding had to stop before she could do _anything_. She wondered if the bullet's still inside him. She leaned over. His sweater and shirt were covering his back but her eyes widened when she saw a lot more blood there. The bullet had gone out of his body. It was somewhat a good thing, because she needn't take the bullet out. It also meant an exit wound. Those were often very cruel.

"Okay...okay...Lord, give me strength to do this on my own."

All the while she mumbled as she searched in her bag. She pulled out clean cloths, a bottle of morphine, one injection needle, suturing needles and thread. She grabbed two cloths. The first one she pressed against his stomach and the second on his back, even if that wound was still underneath his shirt and sweater. It would work in her benefit to stop the bleeding.

The stance she'd taken was uncomfortable, on her heels while she tried to maintain distance. Her ankles wobbled and she found herself losing her balance hard. She fell on her knees. The Nazi's hand came on top of her shoulder, but not in a painful squeeze. He was steadying her. Her shocked eyes went up. He was watching her with slightly raised eyebrows.

"Uh...it's a through and through. I'm just going to press until the bleeding stops."

Rambling was what Alice would do when she made a fool of herself in front of a dangerous man. His hand released her shoulder and she saw him lean his head against the tree and close his eyes again. For the first time she really looked at him. His hair was cut short, but not as short as you'd expect from a soldier. Therefor she saw it was not just plain brown, but rather a dark blonde. His face was chiseled, with that same dark blonde color on his slightly strict looking eyebrows. Unless when he looked like he did now, seemingly relaxed. Than his eyebrows almost made him look like an innocent man.

"Hopefully this won't work and you'll die of too much blood loss."

He might look innocent, but Alice knew better.

The minutes passed slowly and Alice started getting tired from pressing all the time in her uncomfortable position. Her knees were aching as they pressed in the hard ground. Her wrist and lower back still hurt from where he'd manhandles her. But she knew that fresh bullet wounds needed time to stop bleeding.

"You killed my fiancée and my two best friends. You don't even deserve my help."

Blood started dripping all over her hands, so she pressed harder into the wound. It wasn't because she was a sadist, but because his wounds weren't stopping their downpour. It wasn't working. If the bleeding kept going like this, he'd soon lose consciousness.

"Look what I'm doing, preventing this wound from becoming your well-deserved death."

She glanced at her bag, debating if she should keep pressing or get another dry piece of cloth. Maybe she could just go ahead with stitching the exit wound. Her eyes dared up briefly, to his face. His eyes were still closed but now his face was contorted in pain.

"Can you uh...put your hand on this? Hello? Hey?"

He wasn't budging so she put her soaking red hand on top of his free one. Her hand came very close to that gun in his tight grip. She almost touched it. It didn't matter though. What would she do with a gun? She brought his to the wound on his abdomen.

"Press. It'll prolong your death."

He tried to press, but not as hard as he should for the wound to stop bleeding.

Insulting him over and over again in her beautiful language wasn't a very nice thing to do, but he didn't speak English anyway. It didn't do him any harm. Even if he knew English, this kind of people had no emotions. She wouldn't be able to hurt his feelings.

"Press harder."

It was her guilty conscience who made her say that. She pushed his hand against the entrance wound, until he complied with a sigh.

Oh, she was going mad. One second she was insulting him, and the next she felt guilty for doing so. He killed her fiancée and two friends.

"The exit wound is bigger and it was bleeding more profusely. I'm going to work on that one first."

Jacob was dead, her dear fiancée was gone and she couldn't even remember the last thing she told him. She wanted the one responsible for his death to be punished.

"I need to see it first before I know what I'm up to."

The Nazi's head turned but she refused to look at him. Her voice was monotone. Her guilty mind was starting to eat her alive.

She started lifting the shirt and sweater until it exposed skin that was damaged. The wound was ugly, about two inches, give or take. Alice pressed her fingers near his kidneys, but it seemed not to have pierced any of that. He'd need stitches, five at least.

Her hand reached to the bottle of morphine and needle. It was the only painkiller she had, but also the strongest and most effective one. The Nazi would not complain.

"Warte nur," he said, his voice strained. "Wie viel Nähen brauche ich?"

Alice was about to pull open a sterile needle from its packet, while muttering, "I don't know what makes you think I have a clue what you're saying."

His clean hand came on top of hers, preventing Alice from doing her job. He took the packet out of her hand and threw it back in her bag. Then he took the bottle of morphine as well and added it carefully in her bag, as if he tried for the glass bottle not to break.

He raised a finger, and said, "Ein?" He pointed two fingers, three fingers, four fingers, while continuing with saying, "Zwei? Drei? Vier?"

Then he pointed at the needle and thread.

"Wie viel?"

"Oh, at least uh...five," she muttered, raising five fingers, assuming he was asking about the amount of stitches.

The morphine was now in her bag and she stared at it for a moment. She pointed at her bag and looked at him.

"That's morphine."

"Danke, aber nein. Kein Morphium."

He shut his eyes and leaned forward, giving her easier access to the exit wound. He wanted her to continue.

"Are you...are you refusing pain medication?"

To expect an answer was silly. Still it made Alice's confused mind wonder. This had never happened before, never. It was a question she never asked before. Nobody ever refused. Why would they?

Slowly, Alice poured some disinfecting alcohol on a cloth.

"This'll sting..."

Deciding she'd rather to it quick, she pressed the soaking wet disinfecting cloth on his pierced skin. He flinched. She was cleaning the wound quickly, but thoroughly, because she'd vowed to her God to help all in need.

"You wanted my help," she said sarcastically. "The least you could do is stay still!"

He turned his head to her, but she kept her eyes on the wound as she removed her hand and took hold of her suture needle and thread out of the box, where they could stay clean.

For some reason it did something to Alice. He was feeling a lot of pain right now and it would be worse once she started suturing his skin. His pain didn't make her feel better. If possible, she thought it made her feel worse than before.

"It's a gaping wound, lots of skin and muscle damage. I'm going to pull the edges to each other and start..."

Unsure why she chose to glance at him, maybe it was out of curiosity, but she saw his eyes were on the needle.

"I'll be quick."

His eyes rose up, no emotion in them.

Her chest rose him in a deep breath. It was not her job to reassure him.

She pressed the open skin to each other and hear a loud hiss. He was having trouble keeping still. Her fingers moved fast. The first stitch was in, the second wasn't as nicely done as she wanted it to, so she tried to make the third one larger. The fourth and fifth were too close to one another, but at least the wound stayed shut. This wound would scar nastily.

"Done."

Again his head turned, but Alice kept her eyes low, turning to his stomach. This one might be tricky. There was sensitive skin there and Alice needed to check if the bullet caused damage. Her hands were covered with his blood, but it was no use cleaning them. She took hold of the wet cloth and he dropped his hand on the ground. He seemed weak. Carefully she looked at the wound and to her surprise the bleeding had stopped. That would make the process of suturing much easier.

Because this wound wasn't causing life threatening damage, she started pressing in different parts of his stomach and under his ribs. He seemed soar, but the damage wasn't fatal. The Nazi was lucky. He would survive this wound.

"No organ damage, unfortunately."

He was staring ahead of himself. She envied him, because he had faraway look in his eye. Momentarily he wasn't in this war any longer. That was strange because men like him enjoyed the war.

"Morphine?" she asked to pull him back into the present.

"Nein," he said harshly.

With a new soaking disinfecting cloth, she pressed it on the wound, hearing a prominent hiss.

"Clean," she exclaimed, throwing the cloth next to the other bloody supplies. "I suppose about three sutures."

With her thumb on top of her pinkie, she raised her hand to him and showed him three fingers.

He nodded.

She quickly pressed the wound closed and pierced his skin with the suture needle, giving him quickly three sutures. They were all uneven, but again it would be enough to keep the wound shut.

"The worst is done. To prevent infection, all you'll need is some of this," she took her iodide and squeezed a large amount on the wound on his stomach, "and the wound packed tightly."

She did the same with the exit wound, as soon as her rough, but small hands could work.

"Alright, almost done. Can you stand?"

Of course, he didn't respond.

First she took the bandage from her backpack, then she got on her feet. Having no idea how else to show him what she wanted from him, she held out her hand reluctantly. Partly she hoped he'd get the point and get on his feet without her help. His hand engulfed hers and he slowly started to get up. He was weak on the legs.

"Hold this," she said.

She held out the bandage to him until he finally took it. With another free hand in her possession, she placed it under his elbow and put her strength into raising him up. Lord, the man was heavy. Her hands had his dried up blood all over it, but that was not what was on her mind. He seemed, in that small moment, to trust her. She could try and run, especially now that he was wounded and in so much pain. Alice knew that she couldn't outrun bullets. She could run and hope he'd kill her.

"I could try...my team's not so far from here."

Then she was reminded of how intimidating he was and that she'd already helped him out mostly. Wrapping a bandage around your middle wasn't a very difficult thing to do for yourself. If she ran now, he'd survive and she would die. That wasn't what Alice wanted.

"Everyone will be ashamed of me. Myself included. No, I must try and make the call. When I get the chance, I'll take the satellite phone and call my team."

The Nazi was staring at her.

"If only I knew where I was. Can't ask for help if you don't know your location."

Her face froze when she looked at the Nazi closely. He wasn't just staring at her. It seemed like he was listening to her. She had momentarily forgotten that even though he spoke no English, that he could still catch a few words.

She was almost waiting for some explosion, as if he'd yell at her in those German words and run his hands over her body until he found her satellite phone.

Instead he extended his hand to give her the bandage. She took it out of his hand roughly. She pulled out about a yard of the bandage and stopped her movement. In order to put the bandage around him, she'd need to put her arms around him. Several times.

"I can be quick..."

Her arms encircled his waist and she almost winced at the close proximity. He'd raised his arms a little to allow her better access.

"Dear God, help me..."

As a patient, he was excellent. Especially since he wasn't numbed. The first wrap was loose, but the second time she wrapped the bandage around his hips, she waited momentarily.

"Tighter?"

She pulled the bandage a little.

"Tighter?" she asked again.

He nodded, luckily understanding her question.

"Say stop, okay? If it's too tight."

Carefully she pulled until he stopped her with his hands.

"Ja, danke."

That wasn't the deal, for him to touch her. And he definitely didn't say stop, but she assumed his words meant something like stop.

One more wrap, and they repeated the process to tighten the bandage. Again those large hands stopped her as she pulled instead of simply saying stop. Now she needed to cut the remaining bandage. She needed her scissors, which were somewhere in her backpack.

"Hier."

She looked up and saw he'd taken a pocket knife. She stepped back and let him cut the bandage off himself. He threw the remaining of it in her backpack. His other hand held the loose end unto his stomach. He hided the pocketknife again.

"Here, I have-"

But she stopped abruptly, realizing they'd both said a word that sounded much like here. It was strange. She never knew languages had quite a few similarities. She shook it off and dug her hand into her pockets. She kept most of her safety pins in there. She stepped forward again and tied the pieces together with three safety pins, so the bandage would keep his wounds packed tightly.

"Danke."

The word didn't sound like any English word, but she heard gratitude in his tone.

Now what was her purpose? Taking the phone wasn't an option if he kept watching her like a hawk. Then again, she was keeping a close eye on him as well. He pulled his clothes down over the bandage. Next he buttoned up his coat and took his discarded backpack. It didn't seem light, or comfortable, when he put it on his back.

As if on cue, his gun was raised at her again.


	3. Who's That Girl

_**Chapter Three  
**_ _ **Who's That Girl**_

"Wir müssen _jetzt_ gehen."

His tone was more hurried than before.

A gun pointed in her direction made her like a statue, deaf and mute. She could only wonder if God would forgive her for at least not trying to run. Honestly, she didn't want to die. In truth, she hoped her fiancée was still alive and would jump out from behind a tree to seek his vengeance.

In sudden, long strides, as if the Nazi wasn't even injured, he came forward and took Alice by the upper arm.

"Komm."

Even with a cloudy mind, she could tell he was telling her to come. It sounded a lot like _come_ , only he said it with a different tone. The first letter sounded more aggressive, and the word ending with the sound of _o_ _hm_.

She glanced away quickly, trying to rip her arm free, but to no avail.

"Let me g-go," she said nervously.

Alice was not a fighter, but a nurse. Despite the war, she was not trained to combat, nor to know when she was truly in danger. She had always imagined that when a gun was directed to your head, then you were indeed in actual danger. That thought was taken from her when the Nazi only used the gun as a way to scare her, but not to kill her. She couldn't deny it was working.

The brutal man yanked her when she didn't move with him. Alice started screaming.

A fight broke out, where the man struggled to get Alice down on the ground. He had this accomplished easily with his heel, which he pressed behind her knee until she fell. His hands on her shoulders made sure she landed on her back.

With a pained oomphcoming from her parted, shocked lips and again feeling that sore spot in her lower back since the brute had shoved her forcefully on the ground, Alice felt terror when his hand came on top of her lower face. His fingers pressed in her cheek and his thumb was painfully pressed in her throat. She was crushed under his massive body weight. This was already the second time. Now it could not mean much good. She'd helped him with his wounds. He no longer needed her assistance.

The exploding bombs around them grew louder and seemed to be exploding more frequently. He wouldn't force himself upon her while they were in the middle of a war zone, would he? She flinched when she heard a bomb closer to their current position.

Alice was gasping for air through her nose, her entire body shaking with freight. She never imagined this would happen to her. Her beloved fiancée was dead. Her two best friends were dead. She never even got to say goodbye. Their bodies just remained there, on these Berlin grounds.

"Sei still!" he whispered, his hand loosening. "Okay?"

No, she didn't know what he was saying. He raised his hand and pressed only his front finger against her lips. Then he brought his hand up, pressing the same finger against his own lips.

"Bitte ruhig."

His eyes were hinting a plea. It seemed unlikely he was pleading with her to stay quiet. Alice shook her head, her voice an utter mess.

"You want me quiet, so you can f-force yourself on m-me? My f-fiancée should have shot you dead."

Alice's mouth opened in a beginning of a yell, when the man sat up. His body weight crushed Alice's behind in the ground. He was very quick. She saw his hand reach to his middle, take hold of his gun and press the cold tip against her parted lips. Any noise that had meant to utter out of her mouth vanished by the feel of that deadly weapon.

One bullet through the mouth and she'd be dead. She was certain he'd do it; she could see a killer look in those eyes. Alice was at peace, despite the circumstances. Death would set her free. Maybe she'd reunite with her friends in the afterlife. It didn't mean that she still wasn't scared or that her body wasn't trembling.

A light clicking sound came from the gun. Alice thought of how her men talked about a safety lever and loading the gun before you could shoot. It usually accompanied a click. She sent a little prayer to her God.

Forgive me for not having the strength to fight this man. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to fight for my country. I hope I'm heaven worthy.

She stared into the green eyes of the man and imagined that Jacob was somewhere in the afterlife now. Maybe his spirit was with her, comforting her, telling her that it wouldn't hurt much. Those eyes weren't Jacob's, but there was no foul in pretending.

The gun pressed harder into her lips and she shifted her eyes to the gun, then back to him. He wasn't shooting her. When expecting a loud gunshot followed by death, one would not expect for that moment to take so long.

Even stranger is when the person who's about to shoot you, gets off of you. Still it was what happened to Alice. The heavy weight on her lower body part disappeared. Alice remained frozen on the ground, wondering if he didn't want to sit on top of her while he shot her dead. After all, he could easily see she had nothing against him; no weapons, no strength, nothing. He needn't restrain her.

The Nazi got up with some difficulty, wincing a few times, but eventually he did stand tall on his feet.

Alice waited for the gun to point back at her. His free hand extended to her. The other still held his gun, except it wasn't pointed at her. Did he want her to stand before he shot her?

"Komm," he said impatiently.

He was very pale. It wasn't strange, after all the blood loss. In a way, Alice saved his life.

Of course the Nazi wasn't like any other normal human being. He probably imagined he deserved her help. He probably didn't even see it the way Alice saw it, but she was certain he would have passed out by now if it weren't for her help, and maybe he would have even been dead by now.

She could see all movement off the gun, because her eyes were glued on it. It took a path to the Nazi's holster. It went in there and stayed in there. His second hand joined his first one.

Both his hands were now extended to her. Her eyes went up to see what he was up to. There was nothing for her to discover on his face or eyes.

He hadn't killed her or violated her. Or actually, he did hurt her with all the grips and pushes. And he did try to kill her. Alice had seen it in those eyes. There'd been anger, determination, but she'd also seen a shift of emotions that included confusion, doubt, misery and hesitation.

Did this Nazi have a conscience? Or was Alice just being silly now?

Without taking his hands, Alice got on her feet shakily.

What else was she to do?


	4. Knockin' on Heaven's Door

_**Chapter Four  
Knockin' on Heaven's Door**_

He waved his hand to her backpack on the ground. She leaned down and took it, leaving all bloodied and used items on the ground.

In nursery school she'd been taught to put all used items in a plastic bag so that not the entire contents of your backpack would get smeared by blood. The circumstances weren't really asking her to get her work done properly.

Alice extended her bag, saying nervously, "You want this?"

He made a motion with his hands as if putting on a backpack.

"What are you doing?" she asked with a scoff.

He pointed at her bag and waved his hand in front of her. He wasn't talking much. Not that it mattered that he was silent, as she had no idea what he said most of the time.

She felt surreal as she put it on her back, hoping that's what he meant when pointing at her bag. He held his hand up before him again. Alice made the guess that he wanted her to walk before him. She stepped forward, first her left foot, then her right. Each one felt heavy, and the fact there was still a gun in his possession didn't help.

Death was so sharply embedded in her mind.

"Schneller," he said, giving her a shove with his hand.

She tried to keep at a distance from him after that shove with tears on her face. They'd fallen accidentally and she was scared to even move her rigid arms by her sides to wipe her face. All her energy was put in her legs to walk. She didn't quite recognize the surroundings, but soon they were out of the forest. They were at an open field, but she didn't see much with her blurry vision. It felt like they'd been walking well over a few minutes.

"Hier," he said, steering her by the elbow, appearing by her side.

That word sounded a lot like here. He walked past her and her eyes followed his direction. For the first time, he wasn't demanding her to follow him.

Her eyes landed on the shot to death four bodies. Her heart started to beat wildly when she realized where he'd brought her.

Seeing her three friends again made their deaths feel more real. It had not been a hallucination. There was no more room for questions. Jacob, Bella and Edward were dead.

Her knees weakened and she feared she might stumble forward and weep her eyes out. She stood still as the Nazi walked to his friend, the fourth body in the field. He leaned down and expertly pulled out a gun, a telephone, and who knew what else. She couldn't watch the Nazi and his movement for long.

Something about her dead friend's bodies pulled her to them. She stood before Bella's and Edward's fallen bodies. She let herself drop slowly on her knees. Their wounds scared her. Bella's neck was covered in blood. She laid in a pool of her own blood. Edward's front head showed a large gash from where the bullet had entered his head. She refused to see the back of his head, knowing the odds were that there was a terrible exit wound there.

"Oh, Bella," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. Y-You were right, Bella. You heard something and..."

She couldn't finish. She shut Bella's eyes, so she would no longer see the war. Alice shook her head and didn't bother to wipe her tears, even now that she could move her arms.

"So sorry," she repeated.

Her head turned to Edward. She shut his eyes as well.

"I hope it didn't hurt, Edward. Hope it didn't hurt. Hope that you're with Bella in heaven now. Hope it's a nice place."

There was not much she could do for them now, except take his right hand and stretch it toward Bella. She crawled that yard back to Bella and did the same with her left hand. She placed their hands on each other, Edward's on top of Bella's as if to protect her. They couldn't get a grave, but at least their bodies were together as far as Alice could make that possible.

By now tears flowed freely, as she went to crawl to her dearest Jacob, whom lay awkwardly on the ground. She fell on her side and felt her stomach twist hard when she saw what damage the bullet had done.

The middle of his face, just above his nose and between his eyebrows was deeply damaged. All skin and tissue there was gone. The damage was a lot worse than with Edward's face. Probably because the distance had been smaller. Her hand reached up to shut his eyes but she jerked her hand back. She was frightened.

She bent her index finger and pressed her teeth in it to prevent herself from screaming. The last time she did that, the Nazi tried to kill her. With narrowed eyes and teeth biting her finger, she brought her other hand up and gave him the final peace she had to offer. She managed to shut his eyes also.

"I loved you so much. So much."

His wound scared her, so she placed her hand on top of his. It was ice cold by now, but it was his hand. It would be the last time she'd touch him.

"I'm so sorry, Jacob. So sorry."

In his pants, she noticed a bulge. And then, as if her God had given her a sign, she knew this could be her moment to take her, or Jacob's, it didn't really matter who's, but the satellite phone and try to make a call.

She pulled herself up so she wasn't lying completely. Could she risk it now? There was only one way to find out. She needed to see if the Nazi was still occupied.

When she looked up, she inhaled sharply and froze in her position. He was gazing at Alice with crossed arms. His stance was casual, his shoulder leaning against a tree. He hadn't interrupted her during her brief farewell, though it seemed he had finished his business already.

She wasn't sure how long he'd been staring at her. He must've seen her awkward conversations, the reunited hands of Bella and Edward, and her own hand resting on top of Jacob's, unwilling to let go. To explain the discomfort of that knowledge was impossible, but she did feel sick and horrible to know he'd been staring at her private moment.


	5. Stand In The Rain

**_Chapter Five  
Stand In The Rain_**

She saw he had his friend's coat thrown over his right shoulder and probably all other usable objects tightly packed in his pockets or backpack.

Her heart filled with hatred for the man who'd murdered at least Jacob. She couldn't be sure if it was at his hand or his dead friend's one that Edward and Bella were killed. Either way, she hated this Nazi and the dead one. They were responsible for her friend's and Jacob's death.

She noticed he was a big man, even taller then Jacob, whom she already considered tall with his six feet long frame. He seemed well built under his large, thick clothes. That's probably why he fought this war. She had not forgotten his recent injury and still he fought. His face was hard, never showing a smile and she noticed a void in his eyes. He seemed like a machine, made by their leader to kill anything that wasn't supposed to live in their eyes.

After she fixed his gunshot wound, he chose not to kill her. He had been planning to kill her, but then chose not to. So that could only mean he kept her for her information. He couldn't speak English, she couldn't speak German, so her frightening guess was that he was bringing her to his Nazi friends of which as least one could speak English. That had to be it. He thought she had valuable information.

He moved, walking to the three dead bodies. Alice wanted to turn her back because she couldn't bear to see what he would do to their bodies. But she wanted to stay strong. She saw his hands roam over Edward's body, taking his gun, pocketknife and satellite phone. Alice watched the satellite phone and she snapped her eyes to him. His eyes went up to her briefly, and she quickly looked back at his hands. They continued quickly, feeling up his legs, arms and torso's. The Nazi didn't forget any body part. He searched Edward's bag for valuable items. Everything he wanted, he placed in his backpack. He did the same with Bella, searching her pockets, her body, her backpack.

Two satellite phones were now in his hands. Those items he wasn't putting in his bag. He now sat on the other side of Jacob's body, not paying her attention as he dug his hands in Jacob's pockets. She only saw how the third satellite phone was now in his possession and that she was feeling like she was losing this fight, despite still owning her satellite phone.

Involuntarily, her hand went in her pocket, tightly holding it. This was her only shot. He knew very well what he was doing, what was important and what was not.

She was grateful he wasn't doing something horrible to their bodies.

He took out the ammunition from Jacob's and Edward's gun and placed them in his pockets. Probably to use for his own. Then he dropped the empty guns. Alice still flinched, afraid they might go off.

Again there was that stare that unnerved Alice to the bone. His eyes went up and down her body. He waved the three satellite phones in front of Alice. She thought she might go sick. Obviously he'd seen her hand in her pocket.

"Wo ist deine?"

Alice knew he'd grope her if she waited too long, but she could try for just a few more seconds to delay that moment.

He raised his eyebrows and pointed at her hidden hand. He held out his hand. When she didn't move, he cleared his throat loudly.

With an angry sigh, she pulled it out and extended her hand. She stared at her dried-up blood covered hand and her satellite phone, technically still in her possession. When his hand reached for it, she held it tighter. This was her last hope and she was handing it away.

She was going to fight him on this.


	6. Time Is Running Out

**_Chapter Six  
Time Is Running Out_**

The first thing Alice did was tug at the phone. The Nazi only scowled at first, his body not even moving an inch. What had she been thinking? She couldn't fight a soldier three times her size.

But still Alice had to try. She lunged forward, straight into his upper body. She hadn't seen how quick his knee had come up. With full force, her gut landed in that sharp bone and the breath inside her pushed out violently. She lost her balance, which gave him the opportunity to grab her left wrist. With his other hand, he took her elbow and with a twist he had her left arm pressed against her back. Alice shrieked when she felt a sharp pain in her shoulder. He had immobilized her to the point he pulled out her remaining hope and crushed it beneath his feet.

Being in that position hurt her shoulder with each passing second. It had such a hard strain on it. She wasn't sure how long it would take until she'd scream out in pain. With her back against his, unable to see him, except feel him, she feared what he'd do next.

Involuntarily, she whimpered once when she made a wrong movement. It hurt her shoulder so much, especially because he kept pushing her arm into her own back. Her breathing was hard, but shallow. He came closer to her body and she saw his hand appear before her, to her right hand. It was the one which still held her satellite phone.

It could have been her victory. She still had the phone. But if Alice moved, she would dislocate her shoulder. It was clear as day that he was the true winner. Would she just hand it over to him like a poor loser?

No, she dropped it to the ground, giving her the only little dignity she still had. He shoved her away, earning a small shriek from her. The first thing she did was bring her left arm over her torso and bring her right one up to her left shoulder, gingerly holding the sensitive area. She turned around to see him throw Jacob's, Edward's and Bella's phones on the ground next to hers. He stomped four times, effectively or maybe not so effectively, killing the phones. She thought how they might still be working. If only she found a way to take the phones without him noticing. Their sizes were troublesome, but she had room in her backpack. And her pockets would easily fit at least two phones.

It was doable, she imagined in her naive mind.

The Nazi took out his gun and a long object which he placed on the end of the gun. She stared strangely at the gun with the now long barrel. He pointed the gun to the phones and shot several times. The first time Alice flinched, but the other times she stared the Nazi with shock. The gun barely made any sound now. All guns she knew were loud. His gun was silent.

She stared with a frozen body how he shot at the four phones. He shot, as if they needed to die. He shot, until the phones weren't recognizable as phones anymore. He shot, until Alice felt like her life was over. Nobody now knew where she was, except for this monster. He must've shared her thought, when Alice imagined the phones might still be functioning.

He cleared his throat as he'd done before to catch her eye. She looked up slowly, as if to prepare herself to look into his void eyes again. The gun was tucked away again, so at least that was a good thing.

He walked over to her and before she knew what he was doing, his hands came on top of her shoulder, feeling with his fingers. They both went down her arms, as if in a search. Alice pulled her arms away from him roughly. She wanted to step away, but his hands gripped her waist.

She squeaked, but quickly bit in her lower lip. With a hard impact she realized what he was doing. Just like he did with her friend's bodies, he was searching hers. And there was no way of stopping him. He was going to feel every part of her body. It was too hard to breathe now.

His fingers were feeling between her clothes, on her sides, her stomach and then between her breast. Her lower lip was starting to ache from her sharp teeth. He felt above her chest and Alice swallowed thickly. Her hands shook, even if they were balled into fists. No man had ever touched her and the first one who did, was this monster. His hands went around her arms to her back, feeling quickly until he reached her but cheeks. The inspection there didn't last very long, fortunately. She hated that she was in the circle of his arms, as if it were a hug. It more felt like a prison.

Next he felt her hips and then dug his hands in her pockets. She had a few medical items in there if she ever needed quick use of certain things. He felt them all, but didn't remove them.

Alice watched with wide eyes how the Nazi leaned down before her. He was on his knees while she stood on her legs. This was a sight she never imagined to see in her life. It was surreal. Then both his hands came around her right upper leg and she froze. His hands searched her legs, from top to bottom. He placed his hands on her left ankle and then went up, investigating her second leg. Alice involuntarily stood a little on her toes as his hands reached up, higher and higher. She was grateful that he didn't touch her private parts.

Back on his feet, Alice was forced again to look up. In reality, the entire moment lasted not much longer than half a minute. To Alice, it felt like she'd gone to the moon and back. She was trying to calm her racing heart and quickened breathing.

He went to the coat he'd previously put on his shoulder. It must've fallen when Alice started a fight. He grabbed it and threw it over Alice's shoulders. There was no question there in what he meant for her to do.

She watched the coat in horror because only then did she realize this was the coat of the dead Nazi. She looked over the field and saw that indeed he no longer wore his coat. She was mortified to wear it, because there was a gigantic swastika emblem on the left sleeve.

"I'm n-not wearing t-this...t-thing."

He took out his gun, pointed it at her and watched her impatiently. There it was again, the gun, which she feared so much. It was time to just do as he said.

Afraid he might shoot if she made a sudden movement, she decided to move calculatedly. She took off her backpack slowly. Her eyes never left his. She put on the much larger coat over hers. He hadn't told her to take of hers and replace it with the horrid piece of disgrace. So she wouldn't take off her own coat, the one which she wore with pride.

She leaned down and put her backpack back on. He pointed at her, then at his own coat. He was showing her how his was buttoned up and hers wasn't.

Her lips pressed tightly on each other as she started closing the buttons.

The coat provided her with warmth, but still she'd rather go cold than wear it. Except when he was threatening her with a gun. Then she chose to do as he said.

"I'll kill you when I get the chance."

It scared Alice to hear her raw voice filled with venom and a promise. She didn't recognize herself in that tone of voice, or those words.

He steered his head, watched her up and down and took something from his bag with one hand. Before Alice knew what was happening, he had both her wrist on her back and a thick piece of rope wrapped around them. It was almost as if he'd understood her, which couldn't be. He probably wanted her immobilized and this was his way of doing it. Alice had never been tied before. It felt awkward and humiliating. This might've even scared her more than the gun. Her arms were no longer in her possession. It was demeaning.

She thought of her dead friends without a grave. She thought of how this monster had manhandled her for her satellite phone. He'd crushed all her hopes when he shot the phones to smithereens. She could still feel his paws groping her body without respect and even without a warning beforehand. Now she wore a dead man's coat with her hands tied behind her back.

It was a crazy thing to do, but she raised her eyes up to him, even though hers had watered and spilled tears on her cheeks. All the pain he caused her was written on her face.

His face hardened. He shoved her shoulders once, forcing her to start walking.

Underneath the enemy's coat she still wore proof that she was a proud American soldier. She would stay strong, even if her time running out.


	7. Fighter

_**Chapter**_ _ **Seven  
Fighter**_

She thought of her camp, her group with whom she'd spent her time during the war. Zafrina, Senna, and Kachiri, together with Bella and herself had been the ladies of the group. Alistair, Charles, and of course Jacob and Edward were the males. With Alice being caught by this brute, the group now only consisted of five people. Originally they were a group of nine. She couldn't stop her mind from wondering if they would look for her. She imagined how they could find their three dead comrades and assume Alice had forgone the same faith. Even if they didn't find her body.

"Where are we going?"

He shushed her and Alice flinched. It had never been in her nature to be silent.

"Where are you taking me?"

"Schneller," the Nazi said, pushing her with his hand.

Alice talked. She couldn't help herself. It was her mentality.

"I have nothing of importance to say to your leader. I'm just a nurse."

He didn't comment.

She tried a few times to keep her mouth shut. He must understand a few words of English, as she also caught a few words German. She didn't want to give the Nazi ammunition to her own character.

Staying quiet wasn't easy when the minutes turned into hours.

"How are you even walking? Those wounds must hurt. There's the damage to the skin, the muscle and then of course all that blood loss."

It was only getting darker, it seemed.

"When will you pass out? Then I can finally get away from you."

She had a hard time seeing what was ahead of her. The moonlight provided little light.

"Are we going to walk all night?"

At some point, she didn't know what her energy source was. Her legs moved. They pushed. She went forward. But she didn't know how her body could withstand it.

So this was the other side of war.

Her eyes and ears were on alert, but not at all times. Exhaustion was going into her head and it was slowly eating her alive.

For a long time she was able to ignore it, but now the pain in her bladder was unbearable. She'd drank little, but she really needed to go.

It was only when they patrolled in the thickened forest that she felt it was safe enough for her to vow the pain between her legs out loud.

"I need to pee," she said, pointing at a bush and walking to it.

He followed her and she scoffed at him.

"You know, pee. Preferably alone. Can you untie me?"

She turned around a little and tried to raise her hands up to him. She moved with her legs as the feeling became uncomfortable. She'd waited too long.

"Oh, for the love of...pee!" she said, jumping once. "I need to...urinate."

She made a whooshing kind of sound, in the hopes he'd understand she was imitating a peeing sound. He steered his head, obviously wondering if she'd finally gone mad.

"Pee, restroom, a chair with a big hole in it, so you can sit on it and dump a pool of yellow in it, except men, who can stand and pee," she tried hopelessly, instantly mortified she said that out loud.

For the first time she grateful he couldn't understand the language that she spoke. His expression seemed too passive. It made Alice wonder if perhaps he caught a few words of what she way trying to say to him.

He stayed before Alice. Her message wasn't received.

"Please just untie me!" she said with her eyes low and ashamed, turning her back to him and hoping he got the message.

In case he did understand her, he probably thought she would run away.

"It's not like I could outrun your bullets..."

To her surprise, his hand came on hers and he untied her. Then he stepped away, giving her a few well yards to make Alice at least less uncomfortable. Once done, she went to him with slumped shoulders.

The rope was back on her wrists in no time, her hands again in that position behind her back.

He pointed at the bushes, his eyebrows raised.

" _Pee_ ," he said mockingly, walking to them with what Alice thought was a conceited look.

Oh, Alice thought of him as a disgusting creature.

Apparently, he had no shame as he stood with his back to her to pee in a way that sometimes made women envious that they could not pee like that. Alice also turned her back to him, not wanting to see anything by accident, something which she'd never seen before.

He was done much quicker than she had been, and with a nod of his head, they were back on the roads.

"Was it so wrong of me to want to join the war and expect a good outcome? Was that too much to ask for? Were my expectations very improbable?"

In the distance, Alice saw a shape. It wasn't large, but definitely a small house or a cottage. She stopped walking, but the Nazi took hold of the rope on her wrists and pushed her forward. She whimpered as she struggled. Of course she knew being caught by a Nazi was bad news. She only didn't expect for the torture to start in less than a minute, once they were in that enclosed room.

"Please, I have no value. I know nothing. Our camp probably already moved when you killed the GPS of our phones. They must think I'm dead. I have no idea where they could have gone to."

The Nazi pushed her harder, pressing her own tied wrist into her lower back, which already ached from the previous fall.

"I really know nothing!" she exclaimed loudly in pure panic.

The whimpering stopped when the Nazi pressed his hand on Alice's mouth, this time his lips close by her ear.

"Halt die Klappe!" he hissed in a whisper.

That sounded like a curse. This Nazi guy really didn't seem pleased with Alice.

He wanted her to be quiet, Alice guessed. The hand on her mouth and his hushed whisper gave away that much.

If he wanted silence, she would scream. It was the only logical thing to do; to act in the opposite way the other person wants from you. She bit into his hand and found her voice.

It was quite possible that everyone in Germany heard her call for help.


	8. Wicked Game (HIM)

**_A/N:_** These lyrics are priceless!

World was on fire, no one could save me but you  
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do  
No, and I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you  
I'll never dream that I lose somebody like you, no

* * *

 ** _Chapter Eight  
Wicked Game (HIM)_**

Alice knew that screaming was a good idea. Somebody opened the door and she could sense he was American. She squinted her eyes to see better in the darkness.

A sick feeling came over her when she saw who he truly was. He was a German. She just dug her own grave. As soon as she made that realization, she wanted to shrink away. It wasn't of much use as she had already drawn his attention. But then a sudden thought struck her mind. To the outer world, Alice was with the Nazi. It said so on the coat. Surely the German wouldn't shoot her dead if he saw the coat she was wearing. More importantly, why did her captivator give her such...protection?

It wasn't necessary for too long to ponder what would happen with her. A loud gunshot deafened her left ear and the man in front of the doorway felt backwards. Dead.

"Oh God!" Alice shrieked.

The Nazi pushed Alice on the ground when two more men appeared.

It happened quicker than Alice could see it. Both those men were both shot dead. Her eyes flew to the Nazi who'd turned completely hard. His stance showed no fear and his eyes had gone black. He stepped forward slowly to the door, gun in position to shoot if needed. Alice watched how he moved to possible danger. It didn't quite seem like this was a place where he would meet up with his team. He was shooting everyone dead. Everyone, except for Alice. He had given Alice a coat that could possibly help her if the Nazi caught her. But that made no sense.

He stepped inside. His head turned to all corners until he put the gun away. He turned around and watched Alice expectantly. His eyes were still hard.

She had to see to know for sure. It was mighty hard to stand up with tied hands and a heavy backpack. She stepped forward and saw the first corpse with a swastika emblem on his sleeve. So did the second. And she guessed right about the third one also being a German.

She stepped forward, first peeking inside the room. Nobody was in there. It was dirty and old, as if nobody had been there for a long time. It looked like some shed.

When she was inside, he shut the door loudly. He seemed angry.

It wasn't pitch black in the cottage, but Alice's eyes did need some adjustment to the new environment.

"I saw from the distance that those men were Germans. If I could see it, you definitely could see it."

The Nazi pulled of his backpack, threw it on the ground in a grunt. That was one of the few signs that reminded Alice that he was wounded.

"So why did you kill them? They're on your side."

His hand went in his pocket and he pulled out a knife. With that knife in his hand, he went to Alice. She stepped away but he was quicker. He grabbed her lower arm and turned her around. She was already shaking. He released her arm but instead held her tied wrist.

"Vorsicht, America."

She gasped softly. His tone had been quiet and calming. And he said America.

The knife touched her hands and she kept completely still. That's when she felt the rope loosen around her wrists until her hands were freed from one another.

He pulled the rope off of her and threw it on the ground. He turned her around by her shoulders and gave her a warning look. Alice didn't know what he kept warning her about, but she voiced her first thought.

"I know you know those men were the Nazi but you still shot them dead."

She was going _mad_ , despite the fact that she was able to speak such words. The Nazi surely knew this, because her lips trembled and her voice was never steady.

"America?" she added as he'd said before he cut the ropes.

He nodded, pointing at her.

"Du bist America."

"Yeah, I'm from America," she said.

That's what he was surely asking her. Though his voice hadn't sounded questioning.

He reached in his back pocket. He pulled out a watch and held the ends with both hand.

"Darf ich?"

"I don't know what you're saying..."

He held up his left wrist and showed her a similar watch.

"Uh..."

If she understood correctly, he was giving her the watch. Partly, she didn't mind owning a watch. Especially now that she was in the jungle and didn't know what the time was.

She held up her left wrist and looked away.

"I still hate you."

He went to put the watch on her wrist, but stopped. Alice had her head turned away, but looked at what he was doing.

"What?" she said after a while when he only stared at her wrist.

"Entschuldigung," he said.

She didn't know what it meant and her face probably showed.

"Sorry," he said, though it was not the American version.

He said it with a short, hard _oh_ , making it sound like sohrry. Even the r was said in a different pronunciation. Despite the different version of the word, the meaning was still the same. The Nazi was apologizing to Alice, but she didn't know why. Nazi's didn't apologize. They weren't human.

He was apologizing, but Alice wouldn't put a bet on what on earth he was sorry about.

His fingers tapped her wrist. The bruises which had formed there were in his view.

Alice felt one of her eyebrows rise, not quite believing what she was almost believing.

"Hast du Pein?" he asked very slowly in a questioning voice.

Alice understood that Germans said _du_ when they meant _you_. And _Pein_ sounded much like _pain._ It became obvious what he apologized for and what he was asking her now.

She felt anger rise above her skin when he mentioned pain. She'd had enough of him. Of course she had pain. It started when he took away her friends.

She glanced at the watch. It was now 1.02 am. No wonder she was exhausted. She'd been on her feet since eight in the morning.

"Sechs," he said, showing her six finger.

He tapped his watch, then pointed at the door.

"Okay?" he asked.

She looked around. He said something about the number six, the watch and the door.

"Jetz," he said, pointing down. "Ein."

He raised one finger and tapped his watch again.

"Sechs."

And again he raised six fingers and then pointed at the door.

She scoffed and shrugged. It was no use trying to communicate.

"I still hate you," she repeated.

He went to sit on the opposite side of the door. His face showed exhaustion and frustration. He searched in his bag and pulled out something she recognized as a radio. He turned it on, but the words that came out were German.

In the silence, she heard two beeps. One came from her body and one from a distance. She looked down at the watch and noticed it was exactly two o'clock. Hence the beep. The second beep was from his watch then.

Occasionally during the night, she felt hunger and thirst, but ignored it. At some point, she wasn't even thinking of something. She was just staring ahead of her with a blank mind. The only thing reminding her that time was actually passing were those beeps.

The Nazi had come to her once. He placed a water bottle in front of her, along with a can with food. Alice ignored the food, the drink and the Nazi. She couldn't eat or drink while in the hands of a Nazi, with the death of her friends close behind her.

Sharp, cold air hit her face and her hands didn't seem to warm up. She hated to admit it, but it was the dead Nazi's coat that kept her torso warm in the freezing cottage.

She felt he'd come closer to her, so she raised her exhausted eyes. He bent through his knees and stared at her.

"What?" she muttered.

He held out his hand. Alice's eyes went to it as if it was venom.

"Adam. Ich bin Adam," he said. "Wo bist du?"

 _Adam._ That was his name, fake or real. It was the name he gave her. Alice didn't know why they were doing this introductory round, anyway.

She didn't take his hand, but she did reply in a thickly German accent one of the most common German names.

"Anna."

He watched her skeptically. She gave him the same look back.

"Esse etwas," he said, taking the can with the food and putting it on her lap. "Bitte."

He sat back in his corner and said no more. He lied down on his side with his eyes shut. Alice stared at him for a full minute, confused that this man was telling her his name and feeding her. She gazed at the dirty brown contents of the can. It was cold and seemed bland, but after a small bite, she finished it all in one breath. She took the bottle and downed it all down. Water never tasted that good. After a few minutes, her stomach hurt from eating too quickly.

She wondered if the Nazi had fallen asleep or not. His hand was on his gun and his breaths were deep. She decided not to try and find out.

Once he hissed, to which Alice instantly turned her head to him in fright. It'd been a sound of clear pain and distress and it frightened her to hear him make those sounds. It was probably the gunshot wound.

 _Let him die, Lord. Let that be the death of him please._

Her lower back hurt less now, but her wrists ached from the previous struggle against the rope and the Nazi. She glanced at them again. They showed a few nasty spots of red and blue. It was strange that the Nazi apologized for it. It was also strange how she hadn't even noticed he'd hurt her.

Then again, no pain could compare to the loss of her friend's, team and hope.


	9. Kill Em With Kindness

**_Chapter Nine  
Kill Em With Kindness_**

The Nazi stood up when the watches beeped.

"Komm," he said, nodding with his head to the door. "Es ist fast sechs Uhr."

He pointed up six fingers, then he tapped his watch. She glanced at it and finally realized what he'd been telling her previously. He meant six o'clock. She guessed that he told her it was time to leave.

It was still dark outside. Sunrise wouldn't come for at least two more hours. And it was freezing. She looked inside her bag for a hat or anything she might have pushed in there before they'd left the camp. But unfortunately there was nothing in there.

"I need to pee again," she said, taking her backpack in her hand.

Her eyes found the Nazi, who stood and watched her like a hawk with his hand on his gun by his hip. Obviously he was suspicious of her and the search she just had in her backpack.

"At least you're not pointing it at me. That would be so much ruder."

Alice knew he didn't understand her words, but the sarcasm was present in her tone that it was impossible for him not to notice it.

"I already said I have no weapons. But of course you dumbhead can't speak any English and you actually believe I could kill a machine three times my size."

With an exhausted sigh, Alice stood up.

"Why do you care if I wear this coat? Anyone can see that it's too large for me. So yeah, the Nazi might not kill me when they see me. But what about the Americans? They will shoot me instantly when they see the emblem on the sleeve."

"Komm," he said impatiently, opening the door.

He went through the door first, watching his surroundings carefully. His eyes ignored the three dead bodies whom he killed last night.

Alice had questions about this man's purpose in this war, especially when her eyes found the bodies on the ground. They reminded her how he'd killed his own kind.

She tried to ignore the bodies as much as she could.

"Is it safe to pee?" she asked with a sick feeling in her stomach.

He turned his head to her.

"Pee," she snapped, but not so much because she was angry.

Since yesterday afternoon she'd seen more killings than she'd seen at the safe camp.

He nodded, waving his hand. She took that as a yes.

She dumped her backpack on the ground and walked around the cottage. When she was away from his sight, she quickly undid her pants. With all the men she'd been living for the past few years, she'd learned how to be quick in the restroom. And she was grateful for that acquired ability. She didn't like having her lower body part naked for any longer than was necessary.

After she returned and grabbed her backpack, it was another stroll through darkness.

"What do you think they'll do with my friend's bodies?" she asked after a few minutes, again walking before him.

At least he wasn't shoving her or threatening her with his gun. He hushed her and she managed for another few minutes to stay quiet.

"Berlin is an active war zone, as we saw last night. Are you planning on staying in Berlin?"

"Mein Gott..." he muttered.

She could very easily hear he was pleading with God. That however did not mean he was a God fearing man. He was probably exclaiming God's name by means of frustration.

"It's eerily quiet. I wonder if this is what they mean with quiet before the storm."

Alice too was well aware of her surroundings as was the Nazi. She knew his name now, but she couldn't consider him human. He was still the Nazi to her. He kept his eyes around him and Alice did so as well, but there was literally no one. And they didn't see anyone for the upcoming hours.

She was tired and she started to get hungry. A dead guy's watch on her wrist told her it was almost noon. Despite the daylight, everything surrounding them was grey.

There were still the odds that they would come across people. Alice had thought it through what she would do if they saw anyone approaching them. In case she saw any American's, she'd yank the coat off and scream she was an American taken hostage. If it were German's, she'd hope the Nazi would proceed... not killing her.

Every few minutes Alice spoke, and the Nazi soon stopped hushing her or muttering things in German.

After all, it was futile.

"I hope my team's alright.

"What will happen to my friend's bodies?

"Are you working alone or something? Despite that friend of course, whom either Jacob or Seth killed.

"It makes no sense you'd patrol alone. That's way too dangerous. Us American's never patrol alone, so if you come ahead of any American's, it'll be at least two against one. Unless I'm your shield, of course, catching all the bullets.

"My feet are so tired.

"I'm hungry.

"This coat weighs a ton. Did you Germans make it out of steel? Jeez.

"Would you like a change of your bandages?" she asked at last, turning, pointing at his stomach.

She was exhausted and any reason to sit down was good enough for her. However, the Nazi's eyes narrowed as he watched in the distance.

"What-" Alice began saying, when she was shoved on the ground painfully hard, her eyes closing from the pain.

His chest was pressed against hers and his hand crushed her mouth under its force. Alice could only look at him and up, above her. She mostly saw bushes, as that's where he'd thrown her. In her own terror she noticed it was the perfect hiding place.

The Nazi and Alice looked at each other. He pleaded with his terror-filled eyes. This was strange, because what could the Nazi have to be so worried about?

She raised her eyes above to see if she could catch anything. She saw in the distance, vaguely, but definitely a large group of military men.

It was obvious who they were. They were so close and heading in their direction. She could be saved. Since the moment her three friends were killed she felt depressed, but now hope was restored.

This was why the Nazi looked mortified. He could get caught by the Americans.

At last, Alice felt joy again. Her fiancée's and friend's death could still be revenged.


	10. You Can't Always Get What You Want

**_A/N:_** I can't answer my reviews. I get an error, plus when I try to reply by going to the review page, I notice the reviews I received on my mail or not yet on the review page.

So here's a big thanks to 1348413. The quick updates are due to the fact that this story is written down till the end. I didn't want to post a new story with false promises. I will update this story till the very last chapter. In future chapters, it'll be revealed why "Adam" is doing certain things. Lol, stupid Jasper. Thanks so much for reading my story and writing that kind review. You rule as well!

To my frequent reviewer deltagirl74, something will definitely change. But it's not per se her change of mind. Thanks for the review!

And to all my readers, enjoy this chapter! I loved writing this one. And as the Rolling Stones said: You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, well you just might find, you get what you need.

* * *

 ** _Chapter Ten  
_** ** _You Can't Always Get What You Want_**

She took a long breath through her nose and was about to make a high pitched noise or moan, anything that would alarm her men. The Nazi'd felt the raise of her chest and shoulders as she breathed in and before she even had the chance to shriek through her throat, the Nazi knew her plan. His knee dug deep in her stomach quite violently, making Alice's intake of a breath come out soundlessly through her nose in a painful murmur.

It was just pain, she thought to herself. This was not the moment to give up. She was about to take a deep breath again, while ignoring the pain in her stomach, when the Nazi pinched her nose shut. She struggled for maybe three times, when the lack of breath panicked Alice. She could barely move under his dead weight, especially now that her brain and organs were deprived of oxygen.

Her eyes watered with panic and fright.

His own eyes were up, not giving Alice any attention. He didn't want to get caught. So help her God, he would not get his way with this.

Of course he didn't want to get caught. Alice knew that her men would kill him, the filthy Nazi that he was. Alice looked up sadly and found some energy when she saw her men were only a few yards away. She couldn't give up now, not when salvation was that close. She didn't want her God to be ashamed of her weakness. As long as she was still awake and not passed out due to lack of breath, she needed to fight him. She scratched his face with her nails, while he dug his knee harder in her stomach. Simultaneously his free elbow came hard in her sides. The agonizing pain was unbearable and caused teardrops to fall on her cheeks.

Slowly she was choking to death and losing all strength to fight the bear of a man. Her eyes went up to watch her men, even if they didn't see her. It was indeed the perfect hiding place.

Despite her watery gaze, she saw on each and all of those men the Swastika emblem on their chest.

A high shriek would have erupted through her mouth but of course that was impossible with his hand on her mouth and still pinching her nose shut. Nearly all air had run out.

Her enemy was within sight and would surely torture or kill her if they saw her. Quickly she shrunk away from the enemy, whom kept appearing in a straight, marching line just a yard away from her now. If only of one them looked down and looked hard enough, they would be caught.

They, as in Alice and the man above her, who was also avoiding those soldiers. The Nazi above her seemed to be avoiding his own men. He still showed terror in his eyes as they were shifting back and forth.

She came close to passing out. Not knowing how else to alarm him, she brought her weakened hand up and placed it on top of his, the one that was on her mouth. But she was too weak to keep it there and her hand slipped on the ground.

He looked down instantly when he felt her body go limp, thinking she'd passed out from lack of oxygen. He saw her tearful, petrified eyes and therefor leaned down, his hot breath on her neck. He hushed her once as he removed his fingers from her nose, but not her mouth. Instantly, Alice's chest went up and down, repeatedly, oxygen flowing in her airways painfully hard. She closed her eyes, her face turned away from the enemy.

Horrific images passed her mind in the bad case she got caught. Therefor, she did the only thing she could do. She prayed to her God, hoping he'd hear her and grant her her prayers. For the first time, she felt safe for wearing a coat with a Swastika emblem across its sleeve. If they got caught, it might save her life. However, she spoke perhaps three words German. That would blow her cover. Unless she could somehow trust the one who was not only saving himself right now.

The shaking from fright was something Alice didn't have under control. The weight of the Nazi above her did help some. She wondered if he could feel her fear through the thick coats.

The shuffling of silent walking faded into the background and when the Nazi was sure they were gone, he turned his head and looked around warily. Then he looked down. Alice couldn't open her eyes and was taking trembled breaths. She didn't know if they were gone or not.

He removed his hand from her mouth. Alice opened her eyes in a snap. She got a feeling, which she refused to believe, but it was a feeling that told her that this Nazi was more than what appeared to the eyes.

She didn't dare to move. Her eyes looked around, but there were no more soldiers in sight.

"W-Why are you r-running from them?" she whispered with wide eyes, afraid they might still be near. "They're one of y-you."

The look he gave her was a mystery. His hands came on top of hers.

She scowled hard, not having noticed that during her panic and fear, she'd put a firm grip on his shoulders. She had not even realized that she'd held him once she'd realized the danger she'd almost put herself in. He pushed her hands away from himself and was about to get up, when Alice quickly took hold of his hands.

"W-Wait," she whispered in fear.

He shut his eyes for a moment as if he was frustrated, but gently opened them to look at her kindlier than he'd ever done. Yet he didn't say a word.

"Are you sure they're g-gone?"

The Nazi stood on his feet and pulled her up. She was still shaken, but filled with adrenaline. It made her more alert than ever. She knew the enemy was close by, despite the fact that technically, she was already caught by the enemy.

It was killing her not to be able to speak to him. They couldn't communicate and for the first time it really bothered her.

She was an American lost soul, without a telephone or weapons, but with a coat that told the outer world she was a Nazi. And that caused a sudden thought to strike her mind.

"A-Are you like m-me?"

Her voice was still not much higher than a whisper.

"Do you wear a coat and show to the outside world that you're a Nazi, when...in reality...you're not?"

The look he gave her seemed as if he was pondering, as if he was thinking about saying something. In the end, he turned his back to her and started walking quickly.


	11. Eye Of The Tiger

**_Chapter Eleven  
Eye Of The Tiger_**

"W-Where a-are you going?" she whisper-hissed.

Never did those long, quick steps falter.

"Go to hell!" she called. "I'm not following you."

He snapped his head to her and for a moment she thought he understood her.

While Alice was still shaken from almost getting caught by an entire group of Nazi's, this man was perfectly calm.

He stepped to her in a few long strides, held her hand tightly and pulled her with him in his long strides. For each step he took, Alice took at least two.

"Don't drag me like some rag doll!"

The palm of his hand slapped on her face, covering her entire lower face. It was almost like before, only now, he'd turned her around and was pressing Alice's back to his chest so she wouldn't get away. He didn't remove his hand from her lips, but at least he didn't squeeze her nose shut like before.

With his free arm he pointed in the distance. Alice saw instantly. The group of Nazi wasn't out of sight. They were very much in sight. She pushed her body into the man behind her. She brought her hands up and held his lower arm tightly, for her own sake.

Thank God they hadn't heard Alice's loud voice, _thank God_ , but they were heading to a large group of men which she only now noticed. There were so many of them.

She started pushing into his body, willing him to move. They had to move away from them! He dropped his hand from her mouth, but she didn't release his lower arm. He scowled at her, but she only stepped closer to his body and never released that death grip she had on him. It was the only thing she had that came close to safety.

Deciding he wasn't going to push her off of him, he started a run. That meant she had to do a sprint behind him, because he was tall, quick and fit, all three things which Alice wasn't.

It was only when he stopped running, she stopped too. She collapsed onto the ground and panted hard. It felt like her lungs were burning. She couldn't stand, at least not after resting for a few minutes.

Fortunately, it seemed safe where ever they were now. To Alice's eye it all looked the same. A dark grey scenery with very little life in it.

It was after a minute when the Nazi seemed at ease to reach in his bag for two bars. He handed one to Alice, then ripped open his and took a large bite. Alice glanced at it, noticing it was some high protein bar, specially designed for men in combat. Feeling very hungry all of a sudden, she also ripped the bar open and finished it in probably less than a minute. It'd been more then twelve hours ago when she'd eaten that strange, nasty, brown, cold, tinned food, but it'd been very filling.

She felt a tap on her head and quickly she snapped away from his touch.

"Kommst du?"

With trembling legs, still exhausted from the previous exercise, they were back on their stroll.

"Where are we going?" she mumbled.

After she tripped for the third time from exhaustion, the Nazi sighed, looking around more closely.

"Sechs," he said, pointing up six fingers, then at his watch.

"Okay, six o'clock," she said quickly getting the hang of speaking with a foreigner.

Who was she kidding? The only reason she understood is because he said the exact same thing last night. This was only repetition, though it was still nice to know what he meant.

She shrunk away from him, because despite understanding what he said, she did not know the meaning of six o'clock.

"What happens at six?"

"Sechs," he repeated.

"I got _zex_ , but _what_ is about _zex_?"

It didn't surprise Alice when he didn't reply. It was two hours away from six o'clock, Alice noticed on the watch. They were far into the woods now, but it didn't seem like any real fights had taken place here. They walked past no houses, cottages, lanterns or other people.

"We're in the middle of nowhere."

When the sun began to drop, Alice grew nervous. As the face of her fiancée flashed before her eyes, she went ballistic, but she didn't show it to him. This Nazi or whatever he was, was a murderer. She'd witnessed it all.

"So I wonder, do you actually know where you're going or do you just make up the way as you go?"

Alice wasn't strong, but she could try and outsmart him. When she got the chance, she would kill him.

For now, it seemed they were on friendly terms and that worked in Alice's benefit. If he didn't think she was any real danger, her plan would work better.

"I haven't heard any bombs for a long time."

Soon it was pitch black again, and Alice couldn't see more than a few yards ahead of her. The tripping was worse now, because not only was Alice weary, but she couldn't see what she was stepping on. Once, she fell, hurting her knees and hands in the process. The Nazi offered her his hand, but she didn't take it.

"As if I'd willingly want to be touched by your filthy Nazi paws."

The lack of sleep was really starting to get inside her head and making her paranoia. She'd been up since seven in the morning, that is the previous day. That made for about thirty-six hours. It would not do in her best interest to drop unconscience from sleep deprivation. The Nazi could do numerous things to her.

Perhaps he saved her life, but most likely that was for his benefit only. She mustn't start seeing him as a human being. He was a killing machine and there had to be a simple explanation as to why he hadn't killed her yet. It would be a very unwise move to not keep all her guards up regarding this Nazi.


	12. Your Design

**_A/N_** : I should probably say that all errors are mine. My historical knowledge is something I'm rather ashamed of!

Enjoy the read.

* * *

 ** _Chapter Twelve  
_** ** _Your Design_**

It had been deadly quiet for a long time, nothing and nobody disturbing the peace for as much as that was possible during war.

Alice's nature slightly crashed and if anyone who really knew her noticed her silence, they would surely ask her if she was ill. Unfortunately, Alice wasn't in the company of friends who knew her well. She wasn't even in the company of a person who spoke her language.

Her eyes stayed before her. She imagined if she could ignore him, then she could pretend he wasn't even there behind her. Only occasionally did his presence become known to her, when she wasn't walking in the right direction.

That was another thing. They were walking in a certain path. But what did it matter? She could not imagine he was leading her to his camp. Why would his camp be so far away? She didn't want to admit it, but if he was walking in a specific direction, he had a very good mind. If she had to return to that spot where she had left her friends, she would most likely get lost.

She heard two beeps simultaneously, one coming from her wrist and one coming from his. The watch read 6.00 pm. No action was happening yet. She glanced back at him. Quickly, she turned back her head. His stare on her bothered her so.

There were a few more minutes of silence while all kinds of questions ran through her head. It was time, but what exactly for? She didn't see anything around her. Everything looked just the same sad grey. She hoped that they would rest at six o'clock. She wasn't hungry so very much, but she could use a sip of water as her throat had become the same as a desert. She coughed once, thinking she could get rid of that sandpaper feel with a cough. If something happened, it actually even felt worse.

Lord, she had no idea what real thirst was like.

"Wie bist du?"

Her body jumped. She didn't expect him to talk. She most certainly hadn't seen it coming when he was walking beside her instead of behind her.

Curiosity was a foul feeling. She watched him with a scowl and she raised her hand a little. It had to be a universal sign of confusion, she hoped.

"Du bist sehr still."

He spoke slowly as he pointed at her. Than his front finger touched his lips. Her lips pursed. She was almost certain that he was mentioning her silence. He noticed and he commented about it.

Anyone would be silent if they were walking in her shoes right now. Exhaustion, not only caused by a lack of sleep, but also war, would shut anyone's lips in a tight seal. She was thinking he would become angry, because she obviously knew what he meant, but wasn't responding to it. Her body almost expected a shove at any moment.

None of that ever came. They walked side by side, in total silence and with no hard feelings coming from his side. It was well past six o'clock. If that was a good sign or a bad one remained a mystery.

The Nazi did something he hadn't done before. He walked forward with purpose, walking ahead of Alice. She hadn't seen the house shaped shadow right before her eyes. It was hidden by the darkness of the night. Alice wondered if this was their hiding place.

Instead of following the Nazi, she started going backwards. She could run. She didn't have a shot at escape. But Alice owed it to her killed friends to fight back.

The Nazi glanced back.

"Komm hier."

That sounded to Alice's frightened ears a lot like come here. She felt weaker than ever for not carrying any weapons, in contrary to the Nazi. Also she felt small, literally small, as the Nazi, whom was the size of a beast, gazed at her like a hunter would glare at its prey. His eyes were daring her to go against him.

She was slowly stepping back, slowly. He would shoot anyway. Alice knew that. She could not outrun bullets or thrown knives, but by God, she wanted to be brave when he shot. She wanted to be brave for her three lost friends.

The Nazi walked to her while Alice stepped back sooner. Despite wanting to be brave, she could not hide the fact that she was scared. He pointed his thumb behind him at the house. That small gesture was a threat, to follow him along or else. Alice knew he was capable to torture her if she chose to run instead. Despite her resistance, she was too scared of physical pain.

She stepped forward with hunched shoulders, glaring at his blank face, until she was before him yet again, where he could keep a close eye on her. She stood before the door with probably a green face.

"So am I supposed to open the door and be jumped on by all of your-"

The Nazi shoved her away, to which Alice gasped in shock and repulsion. The Nazi showed no respect! She hadn't even finished talking yet.

While she was regaining balance, he was kicking the front door open with much force. He really was brutal. His gun was in his hand as he was on high alert, slowly stepping in. That gave Alice some hope that this might not be that place where the Nazi was meeting with the rest of his team. He was probably about to shoot any American he'd come across.

On the other hand she stepped inside carefully. She looked around warily for any other Nazi as she stepped inside. It was eerily quiet, not something one would expect from a room filled with the enemy. Instead it was filled with a horrible, horrible stench.

Like a martyr, she was waiting for the ambush, the five, ten, or maybe fifty Nazi men to attack her and torture her. The only thing that happened was the sound of a thud as the Nazi dropped his bag and her own being pulled of her back. She gave him a glare when he did that, but when she felt the heavy weight off her shoulders, suddenly she realized how much her muscles were aching. Now that her backpack was off, she was able to take off the offensive coat, her own American flag emblem shining in its glory. She did not care about the cold.

Now they were once again one American and one Nazi together in one single room.

She saw a big bed on the left, some pots and pans in a small kitchen on the right upper corner and an eating table with four chairs on her right hand. It looked all very old and dirty, probably because of the war. This was once somebody's home. A family or a couple lived her. But the war had driven them away, whomever they were.

A sudden feeling overwhelmed Alice. She didn't know where that had come from. If she could make a random guess, it would probably be that she was sleep deprived, abducted, almost caught by an entire group of Nazi's and had seen the deaths of her friends only yesterday.

She opened her mouth and screamed. It was unwise, but Alice wished any American's were near. She hoped by her God they'd hear her, come find her and see that she was caught by the Nazi. She was screaming and praying for help.

It was a fairy tale dream, but Alice was a young girl and still very naive. She still believed in the good. She ran, while screaming, to the second door she saw in the small room. Her instincts told her it was another exit door, right between the bed and kitchen.

Her screams faltered when she tumbled inside and smelled that horrible stench even more sharply in here. It was a filthy restroom, which meant a dead end to her sudden attempt of escape and rescue. But worst of all, it was a scene of total death.

The small area which had once been a place to shower, was now a slaughter room. Alice's eyes were rapidly moving, seeing several beheaded bodies. Their limbs were ripped out of their torso's. The heads lay cruelly next to one another two yards away from the door, all of them placed in a way so that the people who entered the restroom, would see those dead eyes in those heads first.

Five. She counted five heads. Somebody had done this out of sadism. This was the enjoyment of pain.

Not even a minute ago Alice had thought how she couldn't handle physical pain if the Nazi chose to torture her. Seeing how it was done to other people was probably more horrible.

A gurgled, painful, low, strange sound escaped Alice's mouth. She saw now with her own eyes what the Nazi did to the innocent.

She saw today for the first time such horror.

She learned the smell of death.

And it killed her.

"Bist du vollständig verrückt?" the Nazi yelled after her, when his own voice gasped.

The man behind her caused a vengeful feeling to come up inside her, especially because he had gasped. He had no right to be surprised, or anything at all. He was a Nazi, a robot and they carried no emotions. This kind of scenery was old news to him.

"Fick. Komm hier!"

He grabbed Alice harshly by the upper arm and was about to drag her out of the bathroom, when Alice's stomach turned violently. She bent over and vomited. The Nazi didn't release her when she sobbed and emptied her stomach in another violent heave.

Americans, those five people in the restroom were American soldiers. For all Alice knew, her faith would become the same as theirs. Her eyes could not leave the scene and each time she saw those horrified eyes, she heaved again. It never ended.

The Nazi dragged her with him when he saw that Alice didn't calm down. That would've possibly never happened while remaining in that restroom. Partly, she was grateful for that, because she was unable to move herself or to prevent her eyes from looking at her people.

For a moment she was disoriented. Everything around her spun and she could only think of the danger she was in. Pain, torture, that kind of sadism scared her too much. The war was too much for her. She would forever be haunted by that image.

Her head turned to the side and she saw a sign. It was shiny, black and lethal. His handgun was within reach. It was an impulsive decision to yank it out of its holster by his hip and fire it right in his face, only the trigger seemed to be jammed. The bullets weren't coming out. She thought in desperation that the gun had no ammunition in it.

Oh, of course! She'd forgotten to load it first, as she'd heard the men say so often. The gun had to be loaded before she could shoot with it.

How did she load the gun?


	13. Redemption Song

**_Chapter Thirteen  
Redemption Song_**

With that question in mind, the Nazi grabbed her elbow, twisted it hard so she'd not aim the gun anyway near him. Due to the sharp pain, she was forced to drop it. He caught the gun like a professional. She yanked herself away from him, but he kept his grip on her tight.

In her disoriented and shocked mind, she had thought she had a chance to make a run for it. She now regretted her stupid and impulsive move to try and shoot the Nazi.

He started pulling her with him. She was forced to take a step forward, then another.

"Let me go, you animal! Let...go..."

He was one of them. He belonged to the kind that was capable of killing in such torturous ways. She was alarmed, more than ever, because he wasn't releasing her and forcing her toward the bed. She gasped when he pushed her down hard, which forced her knees to come in touch with the hard edge of the bed frame. She fell on her stomach and felt how both her hard were brought behind her on her back. When she glanced back, she noticed a piece of rope in his hand.

"No, no, no, no! Not again!"

She forced herself on her back and kicked him on his chest with both her feet. Alice saw a piece of moonlight on the Nazi's face. His green eyes were set in a glare, obviously at her. He took hold of her hands again and tied her wrist behind her back. She was pulling, pushing and writhing around, but all to no avail. It was a rope of about two yards tall, Alice noticed when she tried to pull it out of his hand. He was quicker. In a speed Alice did not know was possible, he had tied the other end on the bed post which he'd thrown her on.

"NO!" she screamed, uncontrollably and for at least a full ten seconds.

She did not care for the dryness in her throat. At the same time, she pulled hard against the rope. If she was strong enough, perhaps the bedpost would break. It was only made out of wood after all. She also tried to untie the bit on her wrist, but it was a tight knot. Without seeing what she was doing, it was mighty difficult to free herself.

Her screaming stopped when he shoved a cloth in her mouth and placed another piece of rope around her mouth, tying it behind her head. Alice gasped through her mouth, momentarily choking. She stared at him with large, frightened eyes. She couldn't make out his face, but his frame left the bed.

"Ich komm zuruck in fünf Minuten, _okay_?" he snapped in a pissed of voice.

In her now weakened position, her eyes gathered tears. She saw him take his backpack and disappear behind that horrible door. It was the one that lead to the bathroom. Why would he willingly go in there? She listened closely and to her disgust, he'd gone to take a shower in the room of death, leaving her on a bedpost, tied and forced to stay quiet.

As if Alice would ever stay quiet. She was squealing and making throaty noises as much as she could. He wanted silence so she would do the opposite. She felt around with her fingers again. The knot was tight and it was impossible to get it loose. Her fingernails broke and she was positive her fingers were bleeding, but for once she did not care for acting so carelessly. She would do anything in her power to get free. While her fingers worked, her eyes searched in the darkness to see if there was anything, anything at all, which she could use.

Alice's eyes snapped to the door, because it was moving. She instantly became quiet and stopped moving. Her mind said that either salvation or something much worse was coming inside. Three men burst in with their guns pointed at her. Alice shrunk away once she saw that they wore the wrong emblem on their coat. She screeched, but the rope and her filled mouth didn't allow much noise to come out. But by God, she let out all she had, banging on the wall, hoping the other Nazi would hear.

They laughed when they saw she was an American. She should have never taken off the other coat. Two of them went to her with purpose. They yanked off her shoes and her socks. Their next movement was at her pants as they untied it. Alice kicked and trashed, while horrified tears escaped from her eyes.

"Wer ist da?" the third asked.

Alice tried to look back but she couldn't see anything. She hoped the Nazi would win this battle. Even if it was three against one. Even if he was in fact a Nazi himself. She hoped he would save her again, like he did last time.

One of her feet came in contact with one of the Nazi's faces. She was delighted, but that lasted as shortly as it came, when he brought his fist to her nose, effectively and immediately shattering it. The pain blinded her and she was nauseated for the fact that she couldn't scream out in pain. The relief of gasping and yelling when in pain was taking from her by that Adam Nazi. She felt hot liquid that was her blood flow out nose. It ran down her cheeks to her ears. She was having trouble breathing with the extra moisture in her nose. She kicked again, but to no avail and when one of them ripped her jeans open and pulled them off her legs, her entire body jerked when a shot deafened her momentarily. Someone had fired his gun.

A second shot rang through the air. The men above her laughed and Alice felt herself die a little. She couldn't be bothered to see who died, because she already knew who was the unfortunate one. The men on top of her laughed, because the third one had managed to kill the Adam Nazi inside the bathroom.

As her God had done before, save her, she prayed again, more and harder than ever.

It was all she had left, her prayers.


	14. Rescue My Heart

**_Chapter Fourteen  
Rescue My Heart_**

One of them had climbed on top of her. His rough fingers took hold of her crotch. She was wearing her underwear, but despite that, she whimpered and brought her knee up. He dodged it easily. He held her face and a pair of dark eyes stared at her in lust. Her body ached all over, but nothing compared to the terror one felt when realizing a man was about to commit the crime of rape. Each movement hurt her tied wrists and arms and it even ran up all the way to her shoulders and back. His fingers were digging against here private parts; a place not even Jacob had touched.

That's when Alice prayed for her God to pass her out. She didn't want to see and feel what was about to happen. She prayed she would go in shock. That was another way of not seeing your surroundings. She prayed for anything, really, to escape this reality.

Two loud gunshots filled the air, to Alice's confusion. The head above her exploded and she almost vomited in her mouth at the gruesome sight. The dead man's blood and pieces of flesh had splattered over her face and clothes.

The head snapped to the side, right before his body collapsed on hers. She was kicking, trying to get the dead weight off her tied body. It felt like a demon was crushing her poor, weakened body.

The second one was also dead, but luckily Alice hadn't seen how that had happened. She only noticed that he had fallen on the ground by the side of the bed in an awkward position and that he wasn't moving.

When she felt the heavy weight leave her body, she raised her eyes up to see how that could happen. It was the Adam Nazi. He wasn't dead.

She saw how he dropped the body on the floor with no respect. He reached for Alice. The first thing he did, was pull the piece of rope down to her neck and pull out whatever piece of cloth he'd jammed in her mouth hours ago. Or perhaps it was only minutes ago, though it felt nothing like that. Alice gasped air through her mouth as her nose was still radiating with pain.

He was still fully clothed, Alice noticed, which was not consistent with her previous thought. When she heard the shower run, she imagined he'd gone to take a shower. But that wasn't important now. His gun by his hip was her main focus. Alice knew what she had to do. This time she wouldn't fail.

It was probably her imagination, but he seemed gentler as he cut the rope from her wrist. Alice moved her arms when she regained her freedom and reached for the gun in an angry scream. He pushed her away, so she grabbed the nearest thing she could find and threw it at him. It was a lamppost, which he dodged. She threw several books, a dirty plate, a knife, a fork and when she was out of ammunition, she started a fist fight.

"Filthy Nazi!" she screamed, punching the place where she knew was his injury.

He hissed and she tried to do it again. He blocked the punch. She went for the gun, but he pulled it out himself. Instead of being frightened, she was angry so she jumped up to him, put her hand on his so now they both had some possession of the gun. She found the trigger with her front finger and pulled it back. A bullet fired and she did it again. The third time, the Nazi took hold of her waist. She dragged her elbow deep into his side.

"Fick!" he hissed, holding her tighter. "Halt! Stopp!"

"I'll stop when your kind is dead, you monster! I will kill you! You belong in Hell!"

She reached back with her hand and held his side, squeezing as tight as she could and hoping it was his wound she was hurting. He pushed her away from him roughly and she stumbled over the dead body beneath her feet. For a moment, she stared at the dead body horrified, seeing half his face was gone from the shot. Each time Alice thought she'd seen the cruelest of death, she saw something worse.

There was another gun, she saw. The dead Nazi's gun, within her reach. Without giving it another thought, she leaned down and took the gun. It felt heavy and very foreign. Holding that gun represented her captivity by a Nazi whom now had proven to Alice to kill Americans and Nazi's repeatedly. She didn't know who this Adam was and what his purpose in this war was.

"Nein!" the Nazi said, holding his gun in both hands and ready to shoot as well.

It wasn't the Nazi whom Alice aimed for. She could try and shoot him dead, but she was done with her unrealistic decisions. All of them had failed by now. She tried to fight the Nazi so many times, but each time she was the one who lost the battle.

She placed the gun against her temple and took a trembled breath. She saw he looked at her with wide eyes and tight lips. His face showed a mixture of surprise and frustration.

"I'm not trained for combat. You are. Whoever you are. I hope God'll forgive me for my weakness and that this war will end soon for all the people who are strong enough to endure the uncertainty of it all."

There was a reluctance where Alice waited. Killing oneself wasn't something Alice had ever given any thought. As a nurse, she chose life, never death.

The Nazi bent down, slowly, his gun no longer aimed at Alice. He dropped the gun when his hand was an inch away from the ground. It made a thud when it hit the ground. All the time, Alice stared at him in shock at his strange surrender. Her gun was not aimed at him. Still he chose to drop his own.

He slowly walked to her with his palms slightly up.

"Stay where you are!" she said brokenly, pressing the gun against her head.

However, pressing the cold tip against her skull did not make her pull that trigger.

Taking away a life, even her own, was one of the most difficult things to do.

"I will shoot!" she snapped.

He was stepping very slowly toward her. It was as if she was seeing the scene before her in slow-motion. She was very aware of her bare legs and how her own coat didn't reach very low, but his eyes remained on hers at all times.

Alice needed to think quick, because he would reach her after a few more steps.


	15. In His Eyes

**_Chapter Fifteen  
In His Eyes_**

He shook his head with a knowing look in his eyes. It was in either self thought or he was disagreeing with her. It looked a lot like the latter. If he was doing the second, that would mean he understood her.

Alice grew suspicious when a sudden thought struck her mind.

"Do you know English?"

Her voice could not have been filled more with accusation and offense.

The beginning of a smirk covered his lips and Alice gasped. Did he understand her?

It would mean that all this time he'd only been playing a game with her. All that time when she was really frightened, he hadn't bothered to talk back to her. She told him so many things in a certain trust, because he supposedly didn't know English. Now she wondered if she might've said something that could endanger her camp.

There came a booming sound from the wide open door. Both he and Alice snapped their heads. She brought the gun - even thought she was unable, nor trained to shoot - to the door. A large man stepped inside, speaking German which Alice didn't catch due to her mental brain freeze.

The Adam Nazi had seen how the Nazi by the door was aiming for Alice. He probably thought that a fellow comrade was about to get killed by an American.

The hand of the Nazi came over Alice's on the gun. He aimed her arm higher. Then she felt how her finger was forced to press the trigger back. A bullet was fired and Alice witnessed another head being exploded. He sagged down his knees and fell on the ground loudly.

"Took you long enough to notice," the Nazi said in perfect American English.

The Nazi could speak English. It was definitely with a Southern accent, but it was English either way. For whatever it was worth, Alice was a little pleased that she'd found out before he'd admitted it.

The pleased feeling didn't last for long. The feelings of terror radiated in her body as she and the Nazi stood side by side. His hand still kept hers locked over the gun. His front finger was still pressed against hers.

He shot a man.

She shot him as well.

They shot him together.

But she killed a man.

The shock of the Nazi speaking English did not outweigh the shock that she committed murder.

Her hand shook so the Nazi freed her from the murder weapon. He watched her with a scoff.

"Sit," he commanded. "Before you pass out."

She couldn't move. She only looked as the Nazi walked to his abandoned gun on the ground and walked toward the front door with a gun in both hands.

He looked around, his eyes focused. When seemingly satisfied, he put his gun in the barrel by his hip and started emptying the dead man's gun. All the while he kept a close eye on Alice.

On the other hand, Alice kept a close eye on the Nazi. He dragged all four of the bodies by there feet outside, leaving trails of blood coming from their heads. Now Alice was positive this man was trained to shoot for the head, or at least perfectly. Her fingers were playing with each other by her stomach nervously as she was surrounded by death. Even she herself had almost been dead. The worst of it all was that she now had the feel of being a killer, even if it hadn't been her will to pull that trigger.

There were corpses surrounding them. Fallen soldiers were in the bathroom. Killed enemies were dragged outside. Everything was done so coldly.

At the sound of a sharp bang, Alice jumped, snapping her head to where it had come from. It was the Nazi, who'd shut the door. She had been watching him like a hawk, but momentarily got distracted by her own thoughts. The Nazi knew English and Alice did her best to think about what she'd said, but as far as she recalled, she hadn't given him any crucial information which he could use against her team.

"Your nose is crooked," he said, staring at her from across the distance. "Broken, I'd say."

She looked away, then turned away, only to walk away. Now she was nervous, since they could communicate. This brought everything to a whole new level.

"Want me to set it for you?"

She shook her head quickly and reached for her nose to touch it. She hissed, a low moan coming from her mouth at how much one small touch hurt. It hurt if she breathed, let alone if he set it straight for her. Besides, she did not care much about looks. It was just a crook in her nose.

Upon her touch, some hard bit of something unknown was stuck on her finger. She stared at it and brought her thumb up to see if she could crush it. It was very hard and once the redness went off it, she saw that it was actually white. Her stomach churned and a light-headedness caught her. It was possibly a piece of small bone from that man who'd been on top of her.

The pain in her nose started to watered her eyes. She didn't dare touch her face again though. How on earth would she get her face clean? The bathroom was filled with corpses. As if that wasn't bad enough, Alice flinched when cold air hit her naked legs, realizing in horror her pants were still off.

She shook her head on replay now, barely knowing she was doing that. The room was spinning fast. Was she falling?

The Nazi took hold of her elbow, but Alice screamed, "Don't touch me!"

What Alice hadn't seen, was that the Nazi had indeed come closer to her.

What Alice hadn't heard, was the Nazi speaking to her numerous times.

What Alice didn't know, was that the Nazi was worried because for the first time since they met, she wasn't talking and she wasn't responding. As far as he knew, Alice always talked or responded. She was like a cat who couldn't hide her curiosity for long.

That was the moment Alice had a mental breakdown.


	16. Any Other World

**_Chapter Sixteen  
Any Other World_**

She fell on the ground, pushed herself away until her back hit a wall. She sobbed, her elbows on her knees and her face in her hands. Her heart was beating hard and she felt her head throb against her skull. That man was certainly playing a trick with her. She only didn't know how much she was being tricked. But she knew that since she met him, things were bad for her.

Her body was shaking, but not from cold. She tried to stop it but the shivers kept radiating through her body.

Despite her scream to leave her alone, the Nazi came to her anyway. He threw the large, abandoned coat on her bare legs, then sat beside her on her left with a bowl of water and a clean cloth.

She hadn't seen him get the bowl. Or the water. She was surprised he owned clean cloths. Was that his bowl or did he get it out of the kitchen? Why did she stop noticing these things?

"You have shit on your face."

Alice flinched away from his blunt remark, while shifting her bare legs underneath the coat. She was staring at the shut door. All danger seemed to be coming from there. First there were the three men who'd had cruel intentions for her. Second there'd been the man who could have shot her to death, were it not for the Nazi who saved her life. That's what he did. Alice could not deny it. And perhaps a third danger was on its way right now.

The Nazi could tell she was looking at the door, but her gaze wasn't focused. It was a sign of someone having deep conflicting thoughts.

"I'd offer for you to take a shower. But..."

At that he slowly trailed off. His eyes were on the wide open door to the bathroom on their right side. She caught glance of the ripped apart bodies and snapped her head away. For the first time she realized the water of the shower was still turned on.

She almost spoke when she looked at him. But her mind wasn't working at that moment. She had been meaning to tell him that she wasn't like him, but that she didn't stop him from taking a shower as it seemed that that was what he'd been planning to do, before the attack.

"Don't go weak on me, America."

She glared at the door. He didn't know her real name, but he sure found a suiting nickname for her.

America.

"You still have disgusting shit on your face."

She flinched, narrowing her eyes while rubbing her hand on her cheek to see why he kept saying that. When she felt hard bits on the tip of her fingers, she shuddered and felt her stomach twitch. She needn't a mirror to see what he saw. The images in her mind were plenty for her to know what she looked like.

A thousands times over and over she could see that man's head above her explode into countless pieces. Most of them were stuck on her body and she went paranoid. He was everywhere around her.

"Get it off me! Get it off! Get him off!"

Her body jerked violently, her hands touching her face in wild gestures. Partly she didn't want to feel or see any of the horror, but another part of her didn't want her to have those nasty pieces on her face. She was rubbing it away but the feel of it on her hands scared her even more.

"Okay, okay!" the Nazi said. "Hey, take it easy!"

"Get him off me! Make him stop!"

"Be quiet, right now!" the Nazi snapped quietly, touching her lips with his thumb.

He had gotten on his heels before her. His body pressed Alice's legs closer to her body.

"Hush now. We don't know who's out there. Okay?"

He waited for her to respond, but when he saw that same far away look in her eyes, he knew he lost her.

"This is war, America. This is what you signed up for the moment you came to Germany."

Deep breaths in and out, very forced, relieved her upset stomach from some of the stress. Alice brought her now dirty hands on the ground. She didn't dare to look at her fingers, to see what color they now were and what exactly the hard pieces were. It could be clotted blood. Perhaps they were pieces of his skull or teeth.

She quickly placed her hand on her mouth and pressed hard. Her stomach heaved, but she was able to keep herself from vomiting again.

"Does your nose hurt?"

A sob escaped from between her fingers.

"Yes or no?"

Than she nearly started hyperventilating, but she never released her mouth. She was afraid she would scream if she did that and he was right. They didn't know who was out there. Screaming was not an option, not again.

He got on his feet. She heard him shift, so she turned to see what he was doing. He was searching in her bag, finding that big needle with her bottle of morphine. He ripped of the foil, put the needle inside the bottle, and filled the tube with just enough morphine to kill the pain, but not enough to kill her.

He knew medicine.

He came before her, needle already close by her nose. She pushed herself away in horror, with a scowl, only to flinch again as the movement of her eyebrows went to her broken nose, causing more pain.

"Hold still," he said, the tip of it now close to Alice's face.

She whimpered and held out her hand to stop him.

"You need sedation. If not for your nose, at least for you own piece of mind. Do you understand?"

She shook her head to which he raised both his eyebrows.

"Morphine is not just a painkiller, America. Didn't anybody teach you this?"

She swallowed a few times because a massive lump was stuck inside her throat.

"I-It's...also...lethal," she muttered shakily and incoherently because of her hand still against her lips.

She shrunk away from his hard stare.

At least it could be lethal when someone used too much of it.

He took her wrist but surprisingly gentle and pushed her hand away.

"That's not what I meant," he replied curtly.

He held the side of her face with his free hand and was quick to insert the needle at the near edge of her nose, pushing the burning liquid inside her skin. He pulled out the needle, and repeated the same action on the other side of her nose. The morphine was promising at doing it's work. Everything was hurting a lot less. She even felt alright, just the tiniest bit.

The Nazi brought the clean cloth in the water, then started dabbing at her face. She blinked lazily and looked up at him. Perhaps she needed to stop seeing him as the Nazi. His name was Adam.

The pain near her nose and even her eyes had lessened significantly. He brought the wet cloth to the bowl, to her face, and repeated it until the water was too dirty to be used. She turned her head away once he was done, because she couldn't stand to see the insides of that bowl.

Adam stood up and this time she watched what he was doing. He emptied the bowl in the sink. There was a water pump and surprisingly, water came out of the tap. He refilled the bowl and placed it beside her. He handed her a bar of soap which she only stared at.

"Your hands have shit on them."

She looked at him in horror when again he used his blunt way of speaking to her. But when she looked at her hands, she noticed he was right. It was covered in dirt, blood and stuff she didn't even want to name out loud. Quickly she brought her fingers in the water and tried to clean her hands as fast as she could. In her haste and panic, she accidentally bumped the side of the bowl and it flipped over.

Her breaths were more like gasps as she stared at the mess she just made.

"It's alright," he said. "Come here, America."

He got on his feet and placed the soap on the counter. Then he leaned down and took hold of her hands as if they weren't disgusting and violated with dirt, grease and blood.

Once she stood on shaky legs, he placed her hands under the tap and started pumping. The water was ice cold and turned red when it hit her hands.

She glanced back to watch the door. Getting her hands clean was nice and all, but she didn't like to stand with her back against the door.

"I've got your back, America. Don't worry."

Surprisingly, he wasn't even lying. He was leaning with his side against the counter, while pumping the water pump with his right hand. His eyes were maneuvering from between the door and Alice.

She took the soap in her hands and rubbed it all over her hands and wrist. It wasn't a shower, but still it was worth gold.

He stopped pumping and looked at her face.

"I-I still have s-shit on my face, is that it?" she said with a weak voice.

"I did a decent job," he said with a smirk. "Are you talking to me again, America?"

"No," she mumbled, bringing her eyes to her hands.

He didn't understand how badly Alice was shocked.

"Lass dich nicht unterkriegen. Nur wenn dass passiert, hast du verloren."

She was very aware of her state. Her body felt sweaty, her hair was dirty. She wasn't sure what she was feeling. Everything seemed unreal.

"Talk to me, America. I'll translate what I said, if you talk."

She didn't even glance at him. Why should she care what he was telling her in German? Everything he told her could be lies.

She wasn't tempted, not even a bit.

"Don't let them get in here," he said, tapping her temple. "When that happens, only then have you lost. Roughly translated. It sounds better in German."

She turned her head to him. Despite her silence, he was still translating to her what he'd said in German. That wasn't the deal, was it?

This seemed like an act of kindness. Maybe even generosity.


	17. Life Will Go On

**_Chapter Seventeen  
Life Will Go On_**

She sat back down, quickly covering her legs again with the coat.

"You blew his head up," she whispered. "It just exploded. Right...above me."

He nodded once. "I know."

"You forced me to kill another person."

"I did not force you, America," he said exaggeratedly. "I took hold of the gun. I shot."

"A-And? My hand just happened to be between your hand and the gun? Is that it then?"

He nodded. He was actually being serious!

"It still feels like I shot that man," she muttered wearily.

"You were aiming for the sky. If you shot, your bullet would gone into the ceiling. His would have hit you right here, America."

He leaned down and tapped her between the eyes. She shoved his hand away with wide eyes.

"I don't care about that! Because that's not how it went. I shot that man. He's dead now."

"That man? That Nazi, you surely mean?"

"What?"

"You're referring to that thing," he said, pointing at the closed door where he'd put the bodies, "as a man instead of a Nazi. Coming from an American, I call that strange."

The Adam-Nazi was giving her a correction, to which Alice scoffed hard. He was making his own kind sound like the worse party. And all of a sudden she was very nervous.

"Are you telling you would rather have the alternative? Tell me now. Did he deserve to die? Or you?"

"I-I don't know!"

"You do know. You're just too ashamed to admit it."

"No, that's not-"

"Him or you?" he interrupted with a raised eyebrow.

It wasn't even shame why she didn't dare to tell him that she didn't deserve to die. It was something unknown to her. She brought her eyes to the front door.

"You tell me..." she muttered in confusion. "Him or me?"

"What do you mean? I thought I made it obvious who I chose."

She snapped her head to him. He chose Alice? And he admitted it freely.

"Who are you?"

In that question lay all the questions she needed answered. Why didn't he kill her? Why did he save her? Why did he kill Nazi? Why was he avoiding the Nazi?

"Somebody you should have never met," he answered harshly.

That didn't sound right in Alice's ear.

No, it sounded very wrong indeed. There was a finality in his voice that told him to drop that subject, the one as simple as his identity. If she wasn't allowed that, what could she possibly ask him?

Well, Alice had a creative mind.

"Do you always lie to you captives about not speaking English?"

He turned his head to her with hard eyes.

"What?" she asked in a small voice.

"Now that you've come out of your shock, it's best to remain quiet."

"That's not really an option when...well...you know."

He wasn't being helpful as he only stared at her.

"You've kept me in the dark for weeks...about...I don't know! Stuff. I deserve to know what's happening."

"Weeks? We met yesterday."

"Oh just...shut it!"

She crossed her arms and looked straight ahead angrily.

"Who trained you? You're heartless, emotionless, rude, blunt, mean-"

"When you told me to shut it, I assumed it was mutual. So why aren't you shutting the fuck up?"

She stared at him and felt a crack in her heart. She turned her head away and felt teardrops on her cheeks.

"Are you crying? You've got to be kidding me. What are you made of?"

"I'm not a rock like you so leave me be," she murmured.

"How old are you? I've been wondering."

"Leave-me-be!"

"You're not a spy?"

She turned a teary glare to him.

"You were patrolling. Women never patrol. Unless they're a spy."

"No, that's...I wasn't patrolling. Just...tagging along."

"Why?"

He was allowed to ask her questions, but she wasn't? She gave him a foul look. Especially because he was speaking so distastefully.

And she answered him.

"It was New Year. That's supposed to be a celebration."

"That's cute. You still believe in celebrations."

Now Alice wasn't sure whether she should cry or accept the fact that this guy was who he was.

"It was stupid of you to tag along. I almost shot you."

"Yeah, stupid me!" she snapped. "But you shoot everything. Americans, Nazi, everything."

He released a hard sigh.

"Shut up, America."

"If you're someone I should've never met then why...are you keeping me alive?"

He ignored her. The effect was immediate; more tears fell.

"I-am-terrified! I need to know...something. Tell me anything. Please. Will I die if the Nazi catches me? Or will you-"

Or would he help her, that was what Alice tried to ask him. But all of a sudden she felt silly for asking him that.

"If the Nazi ever catches you, stick to your original story. I'm a Nazi who killed your fiancee and friends. I never killed any Nazi and I never spoke English with you."

Alice gasped at that notion. He wanted her to lie. He was a spy or something himself! She was snapped out of her mind when he tapped the watch on her wrist once.

"I want you to never take this off your wrist. It's got a navigation system in it. Somebody knows where you are right now. You're not alone. Okay?"

He held up his hand before Alice could speak. She had a thousand questions. Who exactly was that person who knew where she was? Could she even trust the watch now?

She saw him reach in his pockets. He had two small bottles in his hand. He gave one to Alice, while he put the other back in his pocket. The bottle was very tiny, maybe half the size of her pinkie. The liquid inside was a little yellow and had an oily structure.

"If you ever get caught and the Nazi asks you about Marcus Volturi, Caius Volturi, Aro Volturi or Jasper Hale, then don't hesitate to drink the bottle empty. You can easily take off the cap with your teeth and drink the contents."

She raised her eyes up to the strange man. He closed her fingers around the bottle, while holding her hand while he said the next frighting words.

"It kills you irreversibly within seconds. Quick and painless."

Alice was speechless, while the Nazi motioned to her with his hand.

"Go ahead, kill me with your questions."

"Oh," was all that Alice could manage.

They sat in silence. The Nazi was completely at ease.

Alice was staring at the possessions that were once the Nazi's, but now hers. She was given a watch with some technology in it and poison like she never heard of before. Quick, painless and irreversibly? And there was of course that coat, currently keeping her legs warm.

She could only think of one question to ask him.

"Are you the good guy or the bad guy?"

"I'm the guy who shot your fiancee and friends. What does that make me, America?"

She looked away in shame.

"You needn't remind me, because I have not forgotten," she whispered with newly formed tears in her eyes.

"Then why would you like me to say that I'm either a bad guy or a good guy, when really you already know the answer?"

"No," she said, turning her eyes back to him. "No. The bad guy would've shot me, because I'm an American. The good guy isn't a Nazi, because the Nazi slaughters everyone who is different."

He listened to her with raised eyebrows.

"You're somewhere in between," she said uncomfortably.

Alice saw his hand go in his pants pocket. He pulled out a pocket knife. Only it seemed like the blade was broken off. She gave him a stupid look.

"Can I trust you with this?" he asked with hard eyes. "Don't make me regret this, you hear?"

She took the broken knife from him with her left hand. She was still holding the small bottle in her other hand.

"It's mine. Much more useful then the ones your men carry."

"What's wrong with those?"

"This one was your friend's," he said, showing her. "You need both hands before you can use it."

"So? Yours doesn't even have a blade."

He reached over and placed his hand over Alice's, closing her fingers over the blade and placing her finger on a button by the side. He pressed her finger against it and a blade shot out soundlessly. He pressed again and the blade went back in.

"Oh, that's...impressive."

She handed it back to him and he looked from the knife to Alice.

"I'm giving it to you, America."

"Oh...alright."

She held the knife with its dangerous blade safely tucked inside it with only two fingers. She wasn't sure she liked weapons.

"Definitely the guy in between," she muttered more to herself than to him.

Still staring at the knife, she hadn't noticed when he took out his gun. She did however feel it when he placed it in her lap. Alice shrieked and tried to get up but instead she sat frozen with her hands next to her on the floor. There was a gun on her lap. He put it there. She held a gun before today, but that was different. Now she felt like she was a murderer and that gun was part of the reason.

"Take it easy, America. This war is fought with tanks, bombs, automatic weapons and things you've probably never heard of. The least you could try is learn how to handle a handgun, since I shot your protection dead."

Alice flinched at the brutal words which reminded her that he was the foe, the friend, something in between.

"I could shoot you right now," she said, even though she was too scared to pick up the gun.

"I could shoot you right now as well."

They turned their head to one another.

"But we won't, will we?" he asked.


	18. Are You With Me

**_Chapter Eighteen  
Are You With Me_**

"Is it loaded?" she said shakily.

"Try it."

"I must be out of my mind," she whispered more to herself than him. "Probably because my friends are dead and I'm so exhausted. I can barely make out if this is really happening or if it's only a strange dream."

"You dream of a Nazi giving you weapons for protection?" he asked in mock.

"I dream that I might someday see the end of this war," she said hopefully.

"Hmm."

"What do you dream off?" she asked lazily, putting the scary and heavy gun on the ground beside her - just in case she needed to use it against him.

"Nothing."

Alice wondered if he was only brushing her off or if he truly dreamed of nothing. To her it seemed horrible to have no dreams, in the mind or at night.

"We leave at six again. You might want to catch some sleep."

She raised her eyebrows at his change of subject. It was done very poorly.

"Sleep?" she said, shaking her head.

"Yes, sleep," he said seriously. "You just said so yourself that you're exhausted."

"Being exhausted isn't the same as wanting to sleep. After all that death, how am I supposed to sleep?"

"I'll give you something to help you sleep."

She'd heard about certain medication that could help you sleep, but what if she couldn't wake up instantly when needed?

"How can you be sure if it's safe in here?" she asked. "While I'm on sleep medication, somebody could come in."

"You can never be sure. It's a war, America. It's a risk you take."

Uncertain as she was, she hugged her knees. Her eyes were on the door.

No, Alice wouldn't get any sleep tonight.

The Nazi got up, or, she might need to think of him as Adam now - even though he did call himself a Nazi just now.

He took his and her backpack and brought it with him to where Alice sat. The floor was hard and cold, but it gave them both a good view of the door.

Once seated, he went through his bag and took out a large black phone. He dialed a number. The talk was quick, short.

"Ich brauche jetzt Hilfe."

She kept her eyes steady in front of her. She heard him say help again. He was calling for help.

"So schnell wie möglich ist nicht gut genug! Berlin ist ein Kriegsgebiet. Ich kann hier nicht bleiben."

He listened to the receiver. Alice only heard Berlin. He said something about Berlin.

"Danke sehr!" he snapped angrily in a sarcastic tone, taking the phone from his ear and throwing it back in his backpack.

He was shaking and rested his elbows on his knees. He dropped his head in his palms. Alice nervously kept guard, her eyes staring at the door.

She didn't like to she him in that state. It seemed like something was wrong.

"What was that about?" she muttered.

He shook his head. He wouldn't tell her.

"I'm...uhm...Alice Brandon, by the way," she whispered. "You're uhm...not really Adam, right?"

He raised his head and dropped his arms between his legs.

"No," he said, surprising Alice with his honesty.

She knew that he wasn't much of a talker on certain subjects. He refused to tell her so many things. But he was talking now so Alice gently continued.

"You...uhm...mentioned three names earlier. Uhm, Mars and Kai and uhm...another strange name, those three all had the same last name I think and, uhm, what was it, Jack... no, Jason? Or, at least, something that sounded like that."

He stared at her, eyebrows slightly raised. There was no response from him and her nervous rambling. She swore he was smiling a little.

"I'm not very good with uhm...names."

"I can see that."

He was mocking her definitely. Now she could tell for sure he was amused.

"You are one of them, aren't you?"

"Yes. Keep asking questions and you'll be digging your own grave."

"Really?" she asked in a raised voice. "I'm in the middle of a war with somebody whose intentions couldn't be more foreign to me. You refuse to tell me anything and the stuff you do say make no sense. One of my feet is already in my grave. Which one of the four are you?"

"The latter."

She opened her mouth to ask which one the latter was, when she remembered she said Jason _._ That wasn't his real name, she knew that. She gave him a look and for the first time this Nazi's face transformed in a kind smile.

"Thanks for saving me, Jason," she said, despite still not knowing his real name. "Three times, I believe. Uh, _dan-keh_."

Now why did she do that? Why did she speak German so horridly as she clearly couldn't speak German.

"That sounded bad," she quickly said, insecurities catching up with her.

Suddenly, it was important what he thought.

The corner of one of his lips went up.

"Bitte, Alice."

He turned his head to her.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked. "Before, when I tied you and when we fought."

She shook her head too quickly. He grimaced, looking away.

"Well, I hurt you too, didn't I?" she muttered.

"No, you didn't."

At remembering their previous fight, she also remembered all the things she said when suturing his wounds. She'd been telling him she hoped he would die from his wounds. All the time he'd been pretending not to understand her, and still she didn't know why.

"What?" he asked, probably noticing the change in her expression.

"I was thinking of all that time I was speaking English and you knew what I was saying."

"Yeah, that was fun."

At least one of them was amused.


	19. With or Without You

**_Chapter Nineteen  
With or Without You_**

She looked down at his stomach. Perhaps she wasn't strong, but they had fought.

"I should check your wounds," she said. "A stitch might have broken."

He was already seated by her left side, so he only needed to bend forward and she could check the wound on his back.

"I can be quick," she said awkwardly when he didn't reply or move.

All his previous humor was gone.

He pulled up his clothes, exposing both wounds at once. Alice quickly found her scissors and cut off the bandage. She stared at the sight in fright, then brought her worried eyes up to his. He was gazing at the wound on his stomach, then brought his head up to the door with hard eyes.

Both wounds were highly infected and infections like these were highly painful.

He hadn't bothered telling her.

"When did the pain start?" she muttered.

It would be good to reopen the wound, put some strong antibiotic inside the wound, then stitch it back close again, only not so tight this time. The scar would be nasty once healed, but it would improve his chances of not dying of infection.

He didn't answer. She grabbed her morphine along with a sterile needle.

"No morphine," he said.

"This thing between us started with you asking me for help with your gunshot wound! You can drag me across Berlin as much as you want, but when the case concerns this gunshot wound, I'm making the calls. And I say you need morphine."

She ripped the foil off the needle and filled the tube halfway. She pierced his back and pushed half the contents inside. Then she did the same with his stomach, emptying the contents.

Waiting for a moment for the morphine to work, she cleaned her hands, along with her surgical scissors and knife.

"It's been hurting since yesterday when you stitched it," he said eventually. "Vague shots of pain. I tried to ignore it."

"Not a smart move."

"Is it bad?"

"You could die of infection."

"Thank you, America. That reassures me."

He didn't realize that she wasn't joking.

She cut all the stitches open and pulled them out. The tube of strongest antibiotics she had already placed on the ground.

"Why should I reassure you?"

First she placed the tip of the blade on the wound of his back, then pressed it into his skin. He didn't flinch, so Alice figured he wasn't feeling it. Slowly she cut the wound back open and dead white cells, or as others would say pus, oozed out of the wound. The infection was very deep inside and she didn't dare cut him deeper for she might cut something important.

She removed most of it with a clean cloth.

"Can you take that tube and press some of the slave on my finger?"

She had her finger up and he did as told. With the slightly cold salve on her front finger, she applied it into the wound, as deep as she could get it. She packed it without stitching it. Stitches were dangerous with infections so deep like these. She had no idea it was as worse as this.

Her lips were pressed against each other, which he took notice of.

"What's the matter, America?"

She shook her head and was in time to cut his wound on his stomach with a clear vision. When she held up her finger - her eyes were low for him not to see - her eyes had watered completely. She was working blind now, but she wasn't doing anything important now, like cutting. She was only getting as much of the salve in his wound as possible. She packed that wound as well.

"Best not to stitch it yet," she said with a sniff. "The infection is deeper then I thought. Closing it will only make it worse."

Before she went to the bed so she could sit away from him as far as possible, she searched in her bag for her thermostat. She jammed it in his mouth unladylike and then tried getting up on trembling legs, while trying hopelessly to keep the coat around her bare legs.

He stopped her. He pulled her back on her behind and steered his head when he saw tears on her face.

"Why are you taking my temp?" he asked with a scowl.

"To see how bad the infection is," she mumbled. "If you have a fever, it's bad. Horrible. Dramatic."

"What?" he asked with a little smile at her exaggeration. "It's only an infection."

She brought her wet eyelashes up to meet his cheerful eyes.

"I've seen more men die than live from such infections."

"How many?"

She shook her head, looking away.

"How many live, Alice?" he asked strictly.

"It's not important for you to know," she whispered. "It good to have hope that you'll be alright."

He watched her deadly and asked, "How many live, Alice? Give me the number."

"One in..."

He raised an eyebrow, seeming to almost want to shake the number out of her.

"One in a hundred. Give or take."

The hope in his eyes, like an almost dead candle, vanished. There was an eerie smile on his lips, probably because he now knew how little chance he made. Death was close behind him.

It all depended on if he had a fever or not.


	20. Looking Too Closely

**_A/N:_** I'm going to Greece in a few days, so that explains the numerous chapters!

* * *

 ** _Chapter Twenty  
Looking Too Closely_**

He took the thermometer out of his mouth and read the number out loud to which the red liquid had risen.

"101 degrees. Give or take."

Give or take, he was one degree away from serious concern. And his temperature would rise. That was something Alice didn't doubt.

"One percent?" he asked casually. "How certain are you?"

She could not repeat it to him. She could not tell him yet again that only one of one hundred men who got such infections lived once healed. She could not repeat to him that it was indeed a one percent shot.

"If you're feeling hot, try take off some of your clothes," she muttered. "It'll help keep the fever down. Or take a cold shower, despite the...situation in the restroom."

"No, thank you, to the shower," he said with a grunt, getting off the ground.

He moved a large side desk in front of the front door. He took out two of his guns and placed them on the bed. He kept one in his pocket and the fourth was in Alice's possession. He took of the coat and his sweater, remaining only in his green sleeveless shirt and pants.

Yeah, Alice could imagine how hot he felt with such a fever.

He walked to the bed and picked up her pieces of clothes the now dead men had pulled off of her. He placed the pants, socks and shoes beside her.

"Wear them. In case you need to run."

"Me? You mean we? Right?"

"Yeah," he said dismissively.

Her eyes felt wide.

She was surprised to see that he turned his back to her while fumbling in his backpack. She quickly put on the pants first, buttoning it up. It reminded her of that moment when those Nazi men were fumbling with her buttons, but she tried not to think of that now. She sat on the ground and pulled on her socks and shoes.

He had his phone in his hand again. Alice could somehow see that his body seemed tense.

The phone went to his ear and Alice scowled. He was making a call again.

"Ja, es gibt ein Problem. Ich gehe tot. Nein, ich bin serieus."

Again there was that German and Alice shut her eyes in frustration. She only caught the words _problem_ and _serious_. For the rest, he kept her in the dark.

"Du schuldest mir. Weisst du noch? Folge Aro's Koordinate. Es gab ein Mädchen. Hilfe ihr, bitte."

At this point, Alice was absolutely clueless. It did not help either that he spoke fast. She believed she heard something like coordinate, but that was it.

"Alice Brandon."

She snapped her eyes open and it seemed that he'd given her name to whomever was behind that phone. She couldn't miss her own name, whatever language he decided to speak. And the only thing she could connect the word coordinate with, was that watch on her wrist.

"Ja, danke. Tschüs."

The words didn't make much sense, but they brought Alice's little trust in the Nazi down the gutter. The watch on her wrist felt like a piece of rock. She did not know technology well, but she was frightened that whomever knew her position would find her soon.

The gun, suddenly her best friend, was instantly in her hand and she pointed it at him. She got on her feet and walked very close to him, so her aim wouldn't miss.

He pressed a button on the phone and turned. When he saw her shocked eyes staring at him in horror, he quirked an eyebrow. He barely glanced at the gun.

"How much did you catch?" he asked.

"Enough! _Problem. Alice Brandon._ Couldn't have been a bit more discreet, could you? Or the simple fact that you talk German all of a sudden? God, I cannot believe you had me fooled."

"If you think a little harder, everything would make sense."

"About what?" she snapped, her hands shaking. "About how you tricked me? Now you know you're dying, you're calling a Nazi buddy to finish whatever job you had with me?"

He stepped forward.

"Stay there or I'll shoot you!"

"Go ahead. I'm dying anyway."

She watched with wide eyes how he closed distance between them and Alice needed to think fast. She needed to trust her instinct, right now. It was telling her to shoot. _The man in between_ shot her three friends dead.

After a shaky breath, she pulled the trigger. She flinched at the small sound it made, but nearly not as loud as she expected it to.

He smiled, and said, "Good for you, Alice. You've the killer's instinct. That reassures me."

Alice dropped her arm, feeling stupid for believing he would actually give her a loaded gun.

With some quick thinking, she jumped forward with her new knife and pressed the button, just like he taught her. He quickly leaned away, turning his arm and covering her dangerous hand with his.

"Let me go!" she said, pulling her arm hard.

"Let the knife go, America. You're acting like an enraged teenager."

Those words hit a soft spot inside her.

Whatever was in the small flask might save her. If she believed what he told her and she chose to believe him. With her free hand, she took the flash and took off the cap with her teeth. It was on her lips, tipped...she could almost taste the poison...

Her head was snapped sideways, her hand flying away from her lips and the flask slipping from between her fingers. A second later she felt a sharp sting on her cheek.

"Spit it out!" he yelled.

He was in full panic mode, while Alice hadn't swallowed a drop.

Then again, how was he supposed to know that? He gripped her head tightly with one hand, and shoved two fingers in her mouth, touching her deep inside her throat, causing an instant gag reflex. He pulled his fingers away from her mouth, certain she would bite if they stayed in her mouth for long. She gagged again and couldn't help but spit some bile out on the floor.

"Good," he said harshly.

"You slapped me!" she said in horror, holding her cheek.

"I was saving your pathetic life!"

"It was all still in the bottle," she murmured defensively.

"There would still be a bottle if you didn't choose to act like an impulsive teenager."

Again, he hit her with a soft spot.

"I hate you," she snapped. "Thank you for giving me an empty gun."

"Should have tried it out when I told you to," he reminded her.

"Preferably on you," she hissed. "Now I understand why you're keeping me in the dark. It was to gain my trust."

"There are things I won't tell you," he said tightly. "People, if they get the chance, will torture it out of you."

His hand came up, pointing at the restroom.

"Do you need to see that again? That's a reminder for you what torture is."

Alice flinched and suppressed the bile from rising to her throat.

"The only thing I'll say, because you showed me clearly that in this room either I or you need to die, is this. I called a friend to whom I spoke German, not because you were not allowed to know what I was saying, but in case the Nazi was listening in and heard English. When they catch English words, they'll do anything in their power to find us. Separate us. Torture us. Experiment on us. Kill us. I spoke English, to avoid the Nazi."

There was so much passion in his voice that had Alice staring at the man in a strange way. He scoffed when he noticed her goofy way of looking at him.

"What's the matter with you now?" he asked with a scrunched up nose.

"N-No, oh... uh... n-nothing," she stuttered too quickly.

He was now staring at her in a rude manner that made Alice look away nervously. He must've found it odd that she was suddenly so squeaky and nervous. He could not make out what changed this woman so drastically.

The knife was still in her hand. Her finger went up and she pressed the button so the blade would shoot back in.

Not only did he speak so passionately about why was keeping her in the dark about certain things, but also - for the first time - he admitted to avoiding the Nazi. That gave her hope. She did not think she'd ever feel hope again. This stranger, however foreign, had helped her from the beginning. She was well aware of his crimes as well, but she wondered if he possessed a certain power or immunity. She'd heard about it from Jacob, but never gave it that much thought.

Men with such power or immunity were rare. They gained crucial information.

"Seriously, what's wrong?" he asked.

" _Nothing_ ," she gritted out. "Although, if you call my life pathetic, why try and save it?"

Her voice showed pain and she didn't even bother to hide it. He hurt her when he said that.

"It would be," he said with a hard voice and steady eyes, "if you died now. During this war. But you won't. I refuse it. Suicide is not a noble way to go, America."


	21. Sorry seems to be the hardest word

**_A/N:_** I'm back from my holiday and college introduction! Hope to finish this story asap!

* * *

 ** _Chapter Twenty-One  
_** ** _Sorry seems to be the hardest word_**

Alice was uncomfortable from the way he told her that her previous suicidal attempt wasn't noble. She felt like she needed to apologize, but it was too hard.

"So if I asked you what you were saying in German, you would tell me?" she mumbled.

She couldn't look at him. She bore a lot of shame. And if she thought about it well, she knew that wasn't her first attempt. The first time she tried to kill herself, was with the gun not even an hour ago.

"Yes," he said. "If you asked me. Kindly."

She thought she heard something of a joke in his voice, but she decided to remain serious.

"If you're sharing, could you please translate?"

"I called a friend in England. He owns me a favor. I told him I needed to use that one right now."

She scowled, wondering if he meant his wounds.

"Do you think he might be able to save you? Because I don't believe anything can heal you except rest, antibiotics and disinfectants. And fluids. You need to drink lots of water."

Her mouth was open when the sudden sharpness of his possible death reminded her again that she might be left alone. She brought her feet up and hugged her legs, knife still in her hand. If he was dead, she would need to learn to protect herself after all. It was never too late to learn and get used to weapons in her hands.

"That's not why I called him," he said. "I told him to follow the coordinates of Aro's watch."

Alice watched him with a scowl.

"The watch on _your_ wrist," he continued with raised eyebrows.

"W-What? I don't think I get it."

"I thought a girl as clever as you would get it."

She looked away in fright, because the compliment he gave her seemed sincere. It was different from his previous insult.

"My friend is coming to get you, Alice."

"Why?" she asked, feeling sick to her stomach.

To kill or save her?

He steered his head in disbelief.

"Nurse Brandon," he said. "What was your previous diagnosis?"

She shook her head but he chuckled.

"A one percent healing chance equals pretty much death, wouldn't you say? If I'm dead, the least right thing I could do is get you safe. Then all of my efforts won't have been for nothing."

"Y-Your friend...is c-coming here? To get me...someplace s-safe?"

He nodded.

"And when he's here...y-you won't come to the safe place as well?"

"I wish I could," he said with a tight smile. "But I'm going to finish my job."

"Alone?"

He nodded again.

"Why?"

Then he shook his head and refused to answer.

"What efforts won't have been for nothing?" she asked, not sure she understood what he meant by that.

"My efforts at keeping you alive."

She widened her eyes and he instead raised an eyebrow.

"How can you be sure your friend who's coming here won't get shot?"

"I can't be sure."

"Well, then how can you be sure this watch is still functioning?"

"I can never be sure."

"There must be something you're sure of!"

"When treating your patient, are you sure? About the outcome? No. There are always risks."

"There are miracles as well. You might not die. You might live."

Alice was an optimist.

"How are you feeling?"

"Cold, now you mention it."

Alice took the abandoned coat off the ground and gave it to him.

"Take this and the sheets. Sleep. I'll stay on the lookout."

He looked her up and down as if she'd grown a second head.

"Please rest," she pleaded, knowing he needed it more than her. "It's good for you. I promise to wake you if I hear someone. We'll trade shifts, once you're up. Deal?"

There was only his stare on her and Alice tried to keep her face straight.

"Jackson," she pleaded nervously. "That's not even your name... Anyway, your body needs some serious heeling. I-I've seen people go mad with fever and it were the stubborn ones who didn't make it. Now isn't the time to act stubborn and tough. Give in to sleep. It's the ones who put their pride away that make that one percent. I promise."

She hesitated, but then used his stop word, "Okay?"

Unfortunately, she could see in his eyes he wasn't convinced.

Therefor, Alice put away her pride and voiced out her fears.

"I need you. I can't speak German. I can't fight. I haven't got the poison anymore. I'm nothing without you. Your friend, the one you called, might not come for me. Or he might die. And if you die...I don't want you to leave me alone."

His eyes softened and he stepped forward.

"You need sleep more than I do."

"I don't think so," he said. "You haven't slept for over two days now."

"I don't want you to die," she said sincerely. "I'm so sorry I tried to kill myself. You're right, it's not noble. I promise I'll never do that again. You did that for me. You made me see it. If you don't sleep now, that's the same as..."

She didn't want to offend him, but she meant what she said. If he chose not to sleep, it would be the same as committing suicide.

First his eyes turned hard and she looked away quickly, afraid she'd gone too far.

"I forgive you," he said. "Okay?"

She looked at him in surprise. But then she nodded in relief. He forgave her for trying to kill herself.

He reached inside his pocket and handed her another flask.

"Please don't do anything stupid with this, okay? It's my last one."

Her eyes went up to him, to see if he was serious.

"I c-couldn't take yours...t-thank you, b-but no."

He slid it inside her pants pocket.

"I wasn't asking you to take it, America," he whispered, withdrawing his hand.

Alice swallowed nervously. His hand came on top of hers, where hers was still touching the flask.

"Just in case, okay Alice?"

"I'll only accept it, if you get some rest right now."

Then, to her greatest relief, she heard a consent.

"Okay," he said, giving in. "But only because my bet is on your expertise, Alice."

Expertise, Alice thought. She would hardly call it that.

"I don't want to hurt you."

"Sorry?" she said, watching him with a scowl.

"Your cheek. It's bruising."

"Oh..." She reached up and touched her right cheek with her cold fingers.

"I'm sorry."

She shook her head awkwardly and muttered, "Just stay alive. Please stay alive."


	22. Geboren Um Zu Leben

**_Chapter Twenty-Two  
Geboren Um Zu Leben_**

"I have one more thing for you, Alice."

She watched nervously as he stepped to the gun on the ground and handed it back to her, holding the end so Alice could take the gun.

He handed her a black square like piece of metal. When she took it, she noticed bullets inside it.

"Push it in the bottom of the gun."

She did, though her hands moved through an unknown force.

"Alright. There you have a loaded gun."

"W-Wait-Wait!" she stuttered. "I-I-I've no clue how this thing works, how to aim, how to shoot-"

"Before you shoot, turn this safety switch. You shot me, which says you can shoot when having no other option," he said with simplicity.

She was reminded of that moment. She had pulled that the trigger back and her aim had been close by his chest. If that gun had been loaded, he would've been dead.

"Would you have stopped me? If the gun had been loaded I mean. You wouldn't have let me shoot you? Would you have...stopped me?"

"Of course," he said. "I do not have a death wish, if that's what you mean."

She nodded, muttering, "Good. Good."

"You really did change your mind about wanting me dead," he said, as if only believing it just now.

She gave him an angry look, saying, "I wanted you dead because I thought you're the bad guy. But you're not."

"I killed your loved ones," he reminded her.

"With immunity, right?"

They stared at each other hard, both not willing to give away a single piece of emotion.

"You believe I have immunity?" he asked sharply.

"American immunity," she corrected. "You're obviously on an important mission. When the war is over and say I wanted to sue you in a court of law for the death of my friends, your immunity will save you from murder. The American immunity, which is granted only to highly professional military men, who work undercover to gain information from the dark side. They're allowed to kill fellow American men, women and children, to keep the mission alive. If you have such immunity, it means, really, that you're the good guy. If you have-"

He stepped forward and placed one long finger on her lips. She felt her breath hitch.

"Shut up, Miss Brandon, you hear? Shut up."

"Am I right?" she asked instead, her lips moving against his finger.

"Shut the fuck up."

He narrowed his eyes as Alice was not fazed by his cruel words.

"Are you from Texas?"

His hand dropped and he looked at her with several emotions setting free on his face. She saw a hint of shock, which was followed by fright, only to be replaced with anger and frustration.

"You speak with a funny accent."

He barked out a laugh, the anger and frustration in his eyes vanishing at those innocent words said by the young woman before him.

"I'm going to pretend you didn't say all those things," he said with a straight face which he seemed to have difficulties with maintaining.

"Because I'm right?"

"No," he said too harshly and too quickly. "Drop it."

She smiled, looking away. Alice knew now for sure that he was the good guy, with immunity.

"I'll drop it, but I want to say just one more thing. Then I'll drop it, okay?"

He looked away, but didn't seem to stop her.

"You slipped," she said carefully. "You weren't supposed to kill Nazi, especially not for me. You weren't allowed to speak English, but you did. You slipped, but nobody needs to know. You're only a man after all. Not a machine. And, I think you're alone in this war. Like I am now. Of course you have technology and navigation and phones, but it's never the same as a face to face conversation."

His head turned and she instantly caught the warning look in his eyes.

She stepped back with her eyes on the ground.

"Don't you dare die from the infection now," she said with a tremble in her voice.

After that, she found a chair in the corner of the room, which gave her great view of the bed and the front door. She sat in it, brought her legs up, hugged them with one hand, while holding the gun in her free hand as it rested on her stomach.

She watched how he put on back his clothes, while his eyes were on her, obviously not caring he was dressing in front of a woman.

Or actually a girl.

A young one.

"It's Jasper," he said as he sat on the bed. "My name is Jasper Hale."

Alice smiled a little at him, but she felt also grim. He might just be giving her name, because he knew if he went to sleep, he might never wake up.

"Dan-keh," she said in again her awkward way.

He watched her with a scowl.

"Danke," he said fluently. "It's one word. Danke."

"Oh... _danke_ ," she tried again, looking away nervously.

"Bitte schön, Alice," he said.

She turned confused eyes to him.

"You're very welcome," he translated.

"Goodnight," she told him quietly, feeling a little pleased that he wasn't too upset with her probing and guessing.

He nodded, while watching her skeptically.

Jasper lied down on the bed and surprisingly, fell asleep quite fast.

She heard two beeps, one coming from her watch and one from a distance from Jasper's watch. It was seven o'clock. She glanced at the display repeatedly. Her eyes also shifted between Jasper on the bed and the front door, sending eerie sounds caused by the wind. It unnerved her to not know if it was the wind or a possible intruder.

Either way, she held the gun close to her.


	23. Chapter 23

**_Chapter Twenty-Three_**

It was only an hour later when she saw that he was starting to tremble. The fever had turned into chills, indicating the infection was real now. He was freezing and his t-shirt was still soaking wet. She pulled it off of him and covered him with both the large coats. She pulled the sheets of the bed onto his body, until he was covered up up to his chin to keep him warm.

She stayed seated on the bed, running her hands on his back. She hoped it helped to give him more warmth.

When the chills finally stopped, he broke into a sweat. She kept all the warm items on top of him, because sweating was a good process. The more, the better, but she tried to get him to sip some water out of the canteen as well. Luckily, this job proved not to be so hard and she spilled nothing on him or the bed.

She found a towel in her bag and made it wet in the kitchen sink. Gently she cleaned his face, neck and shoulders, getting rid of the sweat. This she repeated every so often, but most of the time she let him be.

It was pitch black in the cottage now. Only some light streaked inside the room through the window by the bed, covered by curtains. Occasionally she looked at the constant move of Jasper's covered stomach. If she looked with squinted eyes, she could make out that he was still breathing. Sometimes, she would see that the movement had stopped, to which her own breaths would falter. Before she stood to check his breathing and pulse, she'd say the same prayer over and over again. She knew it so well, for she had said it many times before to men, women and children very close to dying.

"The Lord will sustain _and_ strengthen him on his sickbed; In his illness, You will restore him to health."

Upon each check up with trembled hands, she'd feel his hot breath on her cheek and a very fast heartbeat on her front and middle finger. That instantly gave her back some hope, while sending another, more simple prayer.

"Thank you, Lord. _Thank you_."

Nobody could hear how sincere those words sounded, except Jasper's unconscious form.

Time was eating Alice's brain while all the time she stared at the man fighting his way through infection. She checked the wounds every two hours, each time applying some more salve. When she ran out of the salve, she cleaned the wounds with her disinfectant. After twelve hours, she gave him more morphine with a little extra to fight off the pain he was probably experiencing.

He woke up once, very hazy and dreamily. He tried to get up.

"What's wrong?" she asked, placing her hand on his head.

She inhaled sharply when she felt his hot head. It felt even hotter than before.

"Pee," he said, with what she swore a slight chuckle.

"Uh..." she said nervously, remembering the slaughterhouse that was the bathroom.

She herself needed to use the bathroom as well, but had avoided it on purpose. However, she could not refuse her patient's simple wish to pee. With a sigh, she helped him to the bathroom while forcing her eyes not to see what the room was covered with or smell what the room was filled with. It proved to be a hard task and when she brought Jasper's exhausted form to the bathroom, she tried to slip out quickly to give him privacy.

"Alice," he said in a throaty voice.

Her worried eyes looked back at him. He had on hand on the wall and the second on his pants. He seemed like he was about to pass out.

"Lord, renew my strength," she whispered.

In the past, her fellow nurse colleagues would always help the patients in the bathroom to do their needs or freshen up.

Alice had never. She'd never seen another man's or even woman's private parts. But this was her job and she could not run away form tasks that scared her. She would have to take comfort from the fact that her actions would give help to a man in need.

She stepped forward and did the easy job. She unclasped his belt and unbuttoned his pants. Pulling them down until his tights was also an easy job. He still stood with on of his hands on the wall with eyes closed. She feared he would fall asleep and she would have to drag him back to bed while this half pee attempt would have been for nothing.

His free hand was _searching_ she saw and she pondered if he needed help some more or not. She could maybe push his underwear down a little but then, with no warning, his hand had found what it'd been looking for. She came face to face with something she'd never seen before. It was strange and probably the reason why she couldn't even look away.

She saw dark blonde hair low on his stomach. In his hand was his large, thick _private part_ and she saw a stray of urine coming out the end. It landed partly on the ground, partly on the toilet seat and when she snapped out of her shock, she managed to steer his elbow so his aim was in the toilet.

After one more stare, which may have been rude because she was now only staring out of interest, she quickly looked away and felt deep shame. She felt like she'd violated his privacy, while he was barely conscious.


	24. Chapter 24

**_Chapter Twenty-Four_**

The sound of urine hitting the bottom of the toilet came to an end after nearly half a minute. His bladder must have been really full, but so was Alice's. However, she would be very pleased if she was out of this room again.

She turned her head with the intention to help him with his pants quickly so she could but this awkward moment behind her. Unfortunately, what she saw was his hand, still holding unto that thing.

"Can you put it back so I can close your pants and get you back to bed?" she murmured shyly, casting her eyes to the wall to see his other hand still on the wall.

He only hummed but she did feel his shift, to which she hoped he'd tucked it safely away in his underwear so she wouldn't need to do it.

Another glance down and she sighed in relief to see he'd managed it on his own. She brought his pants up and closed the button. The belt was slightly more difficult and when he nearly fell over, she decided to let the belt be. It wasn't important. With his arm around her, though her small frame couldn't do much to help his much taller frame, she brought him out of the room and placed him back in bed. She tucked him tightly in the second coat and covers.

She kept seeing the thing between his legs behind her eyes, an image she couldn't erase now that it had been seen. She felt certain she would never be able to watch him properly again. It amazed her how other nurses saw other people's private body parts with such ease.

She sat on the bed and took his temperature. It was now back at 103 degrees. That was still high, but his shivers suggested that he was cold.

Alice was at a loss. He either needed to be cooled down to drop the fever or stay warm to get those shivers away. He was shivering very hard and despite what the thermometer said, she decided to listen to his body instead. She decided to keep him warm and take his temperature regularly. If it got too high, then she would start to cool him down instead, despite the shivers. It was very possible that he was going into septic shock.

Her eyes went to the front door each time she heard it move. She thought that at any given moment, the door could fly open and men would come in, kill Jasper, and hurt her. She was scared that this time, she was all alone. Nobody would save her, unless she managed to shoot or kill someone with the pocketknife or gun.

Upon each hour, she heard two beeps. One came from her watch, the second from his. Those two beeps were her only friend. They were time and time was passing on continually.

His temperature was at 100 degrees and Alice looked twice to make sure she saw it correctly. That meant the fever was gone.

She was dreaming, Alice was sure. Despite the dream, she thanked the Lord for this comforting dream.

"For giving me strength; Thank you God. For guiding me through the night; Thank you God. For granting him life; Thank you God."

The watches both bleeped. It was eight in the after noon when Jasper's eyes opened lazily and looked around. Then they turned wary as he got up to a sitting position and saw Alice watch him like a ghost. _She_ looked like a ghost. A tired, hungry, thirsty ghost.

Alice felt herself smile at the pretty dream. She liked it very much.

"For even if this it only a dream inside my head; Thank you God. For giving me peace during war; Thank you God."

"Are you okay?" he asked with a scowl, upon glancing at his watch.

She felt her smile deepen. A dream with a healed Jasper was beautiful.

"What happened? I feel like I've been sleeping for a day."

But a dream in which he also spoke as if he really did heal, that was unimaginable.

"You have," she said.

Alice's voice was raw from not having spoken for so long and for not having drunk anything. She felt a very large discomfort in her lower belly.

"Sorry?" he asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"You got ill. You've been fighting a fever since last night. Possible sepsis. I'm not sure."

His eyes widened. Of course he was shocked that he'd been out for an entire day and not just a hour like he'd originally thought. But he was more appalled by the robotic way that Alice spoke. She seemed inhumane.

"The worst is over. You're back to 100 degrees and the wounds are more settled now. Less inflamed."

"I've been out for a day?" he asked, just to be clear.

She looked at the watch, then muttered, "About twenty-five hours and a few minutes."

His eyes were at the door and the unmoved side desk.

"Nobody came?"

"No."

"Did you go out for some air?"

"I wouldn't dare. I'm the same with or without the gun in my hand."

He looked back at her in sympathy.

"Have you slept, America?"

"I am now."

It was a lovely dream.


	25. Chapter 25

**_Chapter Twenty-Five_**

"Sorry?"

She shrugged with a smile, afraid the dream would be spoiled if she told this man inside her head that he was only inside her head as a dream. She wanted it to last. As soon as she'd wake up, she would see the ill Jasper again and she didn't want that.

He got off the bed, his eyes roaming the bed and ground. He noticed at least a dozen dirty wraps, all yellow from a fought infection. There were needles on the bed, all used. The bottle of morphine was empty. The tube which had the strong antibiotic was squeezed tight for the last bits to come out. He also noticed many other wraps, which were less dirty. The smell of disinfectant filled both their noses.

It was uncommon to feel pain in your lower belly and smell anything in a dream, but Alice sure did both. She brought her hand to her stomach and squeezed her eyes shut as sharp pains radiated through her belly to her back. When the pain subsided, she saw that Jasper's hand was playing with his loose hanging belt.

"You never answered my question, America," he said strictly. "Are you okay?"

"Let me be," she whispered, not liking his strictness. "Let this moment last for a-ahh!"

She bent over on the bed, her nose almost touching the sheets as the pain became unbearable. Dreams were not supposed to hurt.

"Alice," he whispered in shock, getting on the bed and leaning over to her.

"I thought," she said through gritted teeth, "that in dreams, one cannot feel any physical pain."

With deep breaths, she forced herself upright. He sat on the bed with his arms on his knees. He smiled softly, leaning forward.

"In dreams, one cannot feel any physical pain," he agreed.

"Okay," she said, "okay, then how is it that I do?"

"In dreams, one also cannot touch anything in that dream. No objects, no food, no people and if you try, you instantly wake up."

She nodded her head quickly in agreement.

He brought his hand up and pulled her ear with a smile. She flinched at the touch and stared at him wide eyes. Now he would disappear. He ruined her dream.

"I'm still here, darling," he said, his full Southern accent giving away that he was from Texas. "You're not dreaming."

His hands came to hers and he took the gun from her.

"You did well. How about I check if the area is clear so you can take care of that?"

His finger pointed at her stomach and she realized her pain came from her overly full bladder.

Before she could ask what he meant, he was already pushing away the side table from the front door. He opened the door and carefully stepped outside into the dark, new evening. He reappeared in about a minute, during which Alice had looked around her strangely to figure out if her dream had really been not a dream all along.

"Coast is clear. Take a leak before you explode."

Her mouth dropped in shock. He however didn't seem very bothered by his words, but instead was putting the non-buckle end through the buckle opening of his belt. He watched her with he scowl as his fingers worked.

"Are you sure the coast is clear?" she asked, distracting herself from the image of what lay behind those pants.

"One can never be sure, Alice, but it's either that or the bathroom."

She nearly vomited in her mouth if she was forced to get inside the bathroom again so she got off the bed and slowly walked. She hadn't realized how badly she needed to go.

"Thanks," she muttered. "For checking the area. I'll be back quick."

"You did the same thing for me."

"What do you mean?" she asked with wide eyes. She certainly never checked any area's for the enemy.

"You helped me. Or was that a vague dream and did I unbuckle my belt during my sleep for no good reason?"

"I-I-I have no idea what you're talking about!" she said, moving through the front door with a flaming face.

When she was at a fairly distance, she muttered softly another prayer.

"Lord, please don't make this situation harder for me than it already is. Grant me the strength to forget what I saw."

Her eyes shut when she found a bush, dropped her pants and got on her knees to relieve herself. It was the best feeling she ever felt and after a minute her ankles and calves throbbed. She took deep breaths and pressed out the final drops and vowed with herself not to drink anything anymore ever. That way, she'd never have to pee again and endure such pains.

No, indeed, never again.

She entered the cottage with her head low, but Jasper caught her shoulders. She looked up in surprise. Also, she was battling sleep at the moment. Each time she thought she'd fall into it, she saw his eyes.

He brought his grateful eyes to Alice's and shook his head.

"You haven't slept, America."

She shrugged, looking around.

"You wanted to leave at six," she said with difficult, her dizziness causing her to sway. "Did you need to be somewhere by now?"

He laughed out loud, steering her body to the bed.

"Honestly, why would think about those things now? Sleep. Okay?"

"B-But-"

"No arguing, America," he said, allowing her to get on the bed. "Sorry, the bed is damp on this side. Crawl a bit to the end."

As she did, he turned the pillow around and put it on the foot's end of the bed. It was clever, because there the bed was not damp from sweat.

Her head touched the pillow and instantly her eyes started to drop heavily shut. She didn't open them. She brought her legs up and lied in fetal position. Her sleep didn't come instantly. First she felt a sheet or coat being placed around her body.

She was aware that any minute now sleep would come. Even her breaths were calmer and deeper. Before she did get into the unconscious slumber, she felt a dip in the bed and a soft touch on her cheek.

A kiss.

Her hand went between the pillow and her cheek. She sighed in exhaustion, because the war was everywhere. Even inside her head. Even while she slept.

She was gasping in the bathroom, seeing again all the beheaded bodies. Her eyes went over their limbs, fingers, the blood. There was so much blood. It covered the floor.

She scowled, because inside the blood she saw another scene. It changed to exploding heads. First there was a face, with eyes, a nose and a mouth. But then shots filled the air and the face shattered into a million pieces. She felt many of them on her face and in horror she realized this had happened to her before. It was in another place, another life, another time.


	26. Chapter 26

**_Chapter Twenty-Six_**

With a jerk, her eyes opened.

"Nightmare," he whispered. "Just a nightmare. You're awake now."

She was panting with fright, her eyes quickly going through the small, darkened room.

"W-What?" she asked confusedly.

"Slow, deep breaths," he said.

She nodded and sat on the bed nervously. After a glance at the watch, she saw it was a quarter to four in the night.

"Have some water," he said, giving her his canteen.

"No," she said hastily.

He raised his eyebrows at her quick response. Alice refused water, because she refused to pee.

"I know you helped me. I know you did things that made you uncomfortable."

She quickly brought her eyes down.

"But America, don't be embarrassed. You were only doing your job as a nurse. It's okay."

He handed her the bottle and insisted she took it to drink. She didn't realize her thirst, until the water went through her throat. Then she nearly inhaled all the water until the last drop.

"You can sleep as much as you want," he said. "We don't have to leave at six."

"What changed?"

"You deserve rest after throwing away your needs for a full day to save my life."

"Oh. Well, I'm a bit rested now. Besides...I'm sick of the nightmares."

He nodded carefully.

"Hungry?"

She smelled something amazing, but imagined it was just a hallucination. She didn't know what he'd killed in the woods or how he'd cooked it, but she wanted to have it.

She was nodding very hard.

"Let me get it for you."

Alice was famished and impatient, but when he returned, it'd been worth the wait.

"It's probably dry now, but still warm."0

In his hand was a bone with meat on it. Alice did not even care what animal it was, but she guessed it was a bird. Or a pig. Maybe a cow. She couldn't see clear because of hunger and the smell of that food.

She got up on her knees and took it from his hands in both hers and took a large bite. Her front teeth grazed the bone. It wasn't dry, it was delicious.

"Thanks," she muttered, sitting back again.

He hummed softly.

When she finished, she realized he was staring at her. He was staring quite openly.

"What?" she asked in a small voice.

"You saved my life."

She nodded, looking down at her lap. Yes, she saved his life.

"You didn't have to."

He leaned down to sit on the bed, staring at her like one would when not wanting to lose focus.

"So did you," she whispered. "You avoid the Nazi. You've killed my friends, but you've killed more Nazi than good people, as far as I know. I believe it was an honest mistake. We saw Nazi, so naturally, we shot. You and Aro defended yourself, because we shot. You work undercover, I'm certain. It must be a special mission to uncover some secret of the enemy, and I think you have immunity to protect you against murder of your own kind, but-"

She looked away, feeling strange. He'd kept her alive, while he could've easily chosen not to. He could kill her if he wanted to. But he hadn't.

"I can't figure out why you'd help me. I must be more of a load than help to you. So that's why I needed to save you. Because for a strange reason, you've saved me as well."

He shook his head.

"No? No to you're not undercover? No to you're not avoiding the Nazi? No to what?"

"W-When Aro was killed," he mumbled, his voice trembling, a sound Alice had not heard yet, "my odds of survival shrunk. Also, I was in pain from where you're lover shot me."

"Jacob shot you?" she muttered with wide eyes.

"Yes. Aro shot Jacob, but hit him in the abdomen, not fatal. Seth shot Aro dead. I shot Seth and Leah in the head. You ran. I ran after you to kill you. I wanted to look you in the eye before I did that."

Alice gasped audibly at the harsh statement. He actually had been planning to kill her. Alice wondered if that still was his plan, because he made no signs of wanting to kill her.

She could not avoid her lips from trembling now she knew so precisely whom shot whom.

"Lucky for you, you were a nurse and that's what I needed. I thought that I could might as well use your expertise before I killed you."

Alice flinched. He spoke very easily about murder. More importantly, he spoke easily about killing Alice.

"B-But you didn't kill me," she said, reminding him of a pointless fact.

His lips twitched.

"Am I a dead girl walking? Was my time up when we met?"

"You talked," he said instead. "You showed me your strange way of dealing with your suffering. I tried to shoot you, you must remember."

"What stopped you then?" she whispered.

He shook his head.

"You won't tell me?"

"I can't."

"Will you tell me after the war?"

He looked at her in amusement, then asked, "Do you believe we'll see the end of it?"

"I must. Why else would I be an American Army Nurse? Why else would you be...whomever you are?"

Perhaps she spoke too optimistically, too hopefully, but she needed to remain those things in order to not fall prey to the depression of the war.

"Come ask me after the war," he said a chuckle.

"I will," she said with a firm nod.

They were both aware that that day might never come, but they chose to believe that their small deal was possible.

"So does this mean you're _not_ planning to kill me anymore?" she asked uncertainly.

"Alice, you have shit in your hair," he said, looking at it.

"Oh," she said, running her fingers through her now greasy hair and to her shock, she felt dirty hard bits from probably the Nazi whom Jasper had shot yesterday.

She felt the blood drain from her face, because maybe she'd been foolishly misled. How could she know what his plans truly were? He really seemed like the good guy and the shooting between her team and his team was, how cruel this may sound, an honest combat. It was a war.

"Go take a shower. Everything's set."

She looked in horror, but he watched her pointedly.

"Trust me, okay? Go."

Alice was yearning for a shower, but not one where the dead was watching her.

"Your friend never came," she said instead.

She wondered if he was dead.

"No, he didn't."

She got up reluctantly and dropped the bone in a trash bin where Jasper had thrown all her used and dirty medical supplies.


	27. Chapter 27

**_AN:_** Sorry for the late update. College's been hectic. Around 13 more chapters are on the way until the end.

* * *

 ** _Chapter Twenty-Seven_**

As slow as one could was, she stepped into the bathroom and was met with a space that no longer held the dead. She blinked and pinched herself, but it really was true and she was awake. All the body parts were gone.

She stepped out of the bathroom and stared at him wide eyed, unable to say a word.

"I buried them in the backyard. It's not much, but a grave either way."

That's when Alice knew with a one hundred percent certainty that this man was not one of the Nazi.

The Nazi would certainly not bury American men.

"That was very noble of you, Texas," she said with a tremor in her voice.

"Texas?" he asked with raised eyebrows.

"You speak funny," she said. "Texan English."

"That's the second time you said that I speak _funny_?" he said with a scowl.

Alice looked away quickly, for briefly, she thought of him as cute. He seemed like a silly child in that moment because he somebody made a little fun of him.

"Wait," he said, walking past her to his backpack, pulling out a few clothing.

He handed the clothes to her. She wasn't sure what they were, but took them anyway.

Once inside the bathroom, she shut the door and stood alone in the small shower. The door couldn't be locked and Alice wondered again if she should take that shower or not. The previous day had made her body sweaty and dirty. Jasper had kept his own washing supplies by the shower. She noticed in her other hand a clean shorts, clean socks and a green clean shirt. He'd given her clean clothes. That was far too kind.

The water was ice cold and Alice kept her foot in the spray, wondering if the water would _ever_ get warm. She remembered him putting on the water _before_ he'd even taken off any clothes. Perhaps she had to wait a minute, so she did. Alice smiled for the first time as slightly warmer water hit her foot and she made a quick dash for it, because it was the only warmth she'd get in this cold, dark war zone. She didn't dare shutting her eyes, but allowed herself to enjoy the feel of warm water soaking her from top to toe.

The scent from the soap was very strong and musky. It reminded her of a man's scent, which brought her mind to Jacob. Her dead lover, left behind in an open field, without a proper burial. But the sent also reminded her of a life before the war. She shook a little as she refrained herself from sobbing. Unsure of how thin the walls were, she didn't want him to hear her cries. She stayed there for a long time. The warmth was comforting and the soap felt cleansing.

Alice shrieked when the water turned ice cold without warning, jumping out of the spray and turning the knob. She used her old shirt to get rid of most of the moisture in her hair and body. She put on her bra and the large, green shirt, which covered her chest quickly. It reached low, halfway until her thighs. That little fact reminded her of her smallness and that he was large and strong and able to kill. Alice had never killed a person in her entire life. Instead, she'd saved them as a nurse.

After an examination, Alice gave in. She'd been planning to throw away his underwear and wearing her own. However, hers was dirty and his really seemed very clean. The nurse inside her appreciated clean things. So she threw hers, her wet shirt and her dirty socks away in the trash bin beneath the sink and put on his shorts with some reluctance. She was growing cold with her bare limbs. Quickly, she put on her pants and sweater. The cold would not be so unbearable, were it not for the fact that she felt all alone.

The mirror above the sink was broken. She looked at herself for the first time, hating she saw several pairs of dark brown eyes looking back at her. Her hair was soaking wet, appearing black. Alice didn't like to look at herself. It reminded her that she was alive while here three friends were not. Angrily she brushed her teeth with here eyes low. She spit, rinsed, threw her things back in her bag.

It was perhaps her foggy brain for trusting Jasper so quickly. She started doubting it again. Her hair was soaking wet, but she ignored it. Jacob was fresh on her mind and she had questions for Jasper.

When she went back into the room, he was sitting on the bed. His eyes turned to Alice when he heard her approaching. It was very dark in the room, but they noticed each other just enough.

She would get answers.

"Where are you taking me?"

He shook his head.

"When will we get there?"

"I'm a soldier. Not God. I cannot give such details with certainty."

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she snapped. "You can't tell me _anything_? _Who_ ever you are, _what_ ever you do, you and Aro were obviously on some mission. I'm not stupid. At least give me credit for figuring that out!"

He raised both eyebrows and she stepped forward angrily.

"You're a liar! You play games! Oh, you thought it was funny to not let me know that you speak English? Because I'm not laughing! I just want to say that if I'm the Joker in your game, then really, kill me now and finish that mission you and Aro started for whatever Nazi, English, American or whatever secret nation you're working for."

She crossed her arms when his face remained passive.

"Whatever," she muttered. "Obviously you're of some other specie. Who many people have you killed? How many women? How many children? What have you got running through your veins?"

"There's no mission any longer, Alice," he said in a hard voice. "The mission was made for four men, and if necessary, three. When only two of us remained, we were to abort the mission."

Alice scoffed, her hostility toward him softening for the way that he spoke. Despite the hardness, there was emotion in it.

"Where are those other two men?" she asked.

"Marcus and Caius were killed last week. When Aro died, our mission died with it."

Alice felt sick all of a sudden.


	28. Chapter 28

**_Chapter Twenty-Eight_**

"What's the mission?" she tried

He shook his head.

" _What_ can you tell me?"

He looked away tiredly.

"Last night, you said that you'd continue your mission alone. Now you're saying it was a mission for at least two men."

"Sharp," he said, to which Alice raised her eyebrows. "I figured, if I'm dying, I might as well die fighting. But I did not expect to lay in bed sick for a day, barley conscious."

"Noble..." she muttered. "Wanting to die for your country. Which is..." She waited for him to name the country he was fighting for.

He gave her a look.

"You might as well say Texas. You can't hide your accent."

He kept giving her the same look.

"At least admit that you're an American!"

"Alice, I'm not giving you that information."

"Fine. Why am I still alive?"

"Didn't we agree I'd tell you after the war?"

She stepped forward, until she reached the bed. She sat on the bed, just a few inches away from him.

"I think it's important to live in the now. Your friends died. Mine did too. We could be next. Then I'll never know."

He grimaced, staring at her for a second longer than necessary.

"I was chosen for the mission," he said, staring into the distance, "for certain reasons. As you've seen, and pointed out so nicely a moment ago, I'm of another specie. I kill. I rarely panic. I've been told to be heartless."

Alice inched away form him with large eyes.

"Then I thought that perhaps that's a lie. Because I met you."

"Met me?" she asked baffled. "Not quite. You don't know anything about me."

He leaned closer to her before saying, "You were different. Hopeful. Your small talk during your hell was unexpected."

She felt anything but hopeful so she wasn't sure what gave him that impression.

"I felt different when I met you."

Jasper looked away with a smile.

"Partly, it's driving me insane when you talk. You have no pause button."

She glared at him openly for insulting her.

" _But_ partly I like it."

"Yeah, because I'm the Joker in this game, right? Like in the woods when you pretended not to understand me while I tried to say I had to pee. Yeah, I bet you like that."

He laughed out loud. Truth be told, Alice's feelings were hurt. When he saw her saddened face, he recovered from his fit.

"I like the way that you speak, Alice. I'm not used to so much talk. I've been with three other men for the past... _time_ and us men don't speak often. You heard my telephone call. That's how it always goes, give or take. Hell, even my fiancee didn't talk as much as you."

"I can't help it," she hissed quietly.

"Then don't. I've grown used to your voice now."

She gave him a look.

"What?" he asked with a shrug.

"Could you be any meaner?"

"You had it coming for calling my accent funny," he reminded her with a nudge.

Alice froze at the small, chosen physical contact. He lied down on the bed and sighed.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

After a second, she repeated it.

"Where are we going? Where are we going? Where are we going? Where are we going?"

He sat up and watched her in annoyance.

"Where are we going?"

"America," he murmured. "You little child."

"Where are we going? Where are we going?"

"I just told you, lady!" he snapped.

"When?" she said with wide eyes. "You never told me where we're going."

"Ah," he said, realizing her mistake. "When I said America, I wasn't calling you on your nickname."

"What do you mean? I mean, are you talking about America? What do you mean with America? I thought you were calling me America again. How can we go to America?"

He rubbed his front head with his fingers, his eyes shut.

"I helped you, have I not?" he asked. "Keep holding unto that."

"It's a very vague thing to hold unto."

"I'll bring you back home, America. Okay?"

She bit her lip nervously, afraid that starting to believe him might damage her if he was lying.

"Is my home also your home or is yours somewhere here in Europe?" she asked.

He shook his head.

"Afrika?" she joked.

He chuckled.

"Perhaps you own the lone continent of Antarctica. I hear it's cold there."

"Ah, little Alice shows me her dark side."

"I've had a good master to learn from."

He shook his head with a smile.

"I don't have one," he said quietly.

"A master?"

"A home," he said.

Alice grew quiet.

"Uncomfortable now? Ah, you must have a much larger light than dark side in you."

She smiled nervously. "You caught me off guard, is all. But I thought you mentioned a fiancee. Did she...die?"

"She broke off the engagement."

"Why?"

"I told her I was going into war. She didn't want me to do that. So she broke us off."

"Did it hurt much?"

He shrugged. "A little, but I couldn't have not gone because of her. It's something I had to do. Choosing to not go for her sake would have been holding back on myself. I don't want to be that person, the one who slacks his own tires to make another person happy."

"Couldn't you have come to a certain agreement which made you both happy?"

"It's either going to war or not, America. I couldn't have gone _half_ to war."

"Yes, I know, but pretend she really badly wanted to become a doctor. And if you told her you'd help her accomplish her dream once you were back, couldn't that have been a good agreement? That way you are happy and she is happy."

"I believe it's a mindset someones has or hasn't. I get her frustration, but she gave me an ultimatum. The war or her. I've blamed her a long time for giving me that ultimatum."

"Sorry."

"It was about five years ago," he said with a shrug. "I've gotten over it."

Then he asked with a scowl, because a sudden thought crossed his mind;

"How old are you, America?"


	29. Chapter 29

**_Chapter Twenty-Nine_**

"Who cares?" she said defensively.

Alice did not like giving her age away. It was a weak subject, something that made her uncomfortable.

"I'm just interested. Aren't you interested knowing my age?"

"Not really. You're about twenty-two to twenty-six. Who cares about knowing for the exact number?"

"Twenty-seven," he offered quietly. "You're about twenty-one."

Yes, Alice knew that she looked older for her age. In fact, to the outer world she was twenty-two, almost twenty-three.

"By the looks of your guilty face, you're younger then twenty-one...you lied about your age to get in."

Before he caught more things of her face, she made sure to look away so he would not see it.

She nodded.

"When I went into war as a nurse last year," she said nervously, "I signed up with a date of birth that counted that I'd just turned twenty-one. It's a rule to be at least twenty-one if you want to enroll. So, twenty-tree now...I seem twenty _ish_."

He narrowed his eyes, seeming to understand what she was saying.

"You're twenty-three according to some date of birth you made up. What's your real date of birth?"

Before she gave him a date of birth, she thought well. Nobody, not even Jacob knew her real age.

But Jacob was gone now. She didn't like to have secrets. So she told Jasper. She told him the truth.

"1927. December. The twenty-fifth."

The fact that her birthday was on Christmas did not make Jasper gasp. He calculated her age very quickly.

"You turned _seventeen_ last week?" he asked with hard eyes. "Fick meine Leibe! Du bist ein Kind!"

"What was that?" she muttered, meaning the part he spoke in German.

"A kid," he said in disbelief. "You're a kid."

"I really had to join the war. You understand that, don't you?"

"No, I do not understand a child's business in war. You were fifteen then, when you enrolled?"

"Only for two weeks," she whispered. "I went into war on December the ninth. The need of medical assistent grew and I'd finished my education. The times were hectic. Many girls were able to fool the system."

She remembered well how it went. It wasn't even a little difficult to get in.

The man was staring ahead of himself, seemingly very upset.

"We all have our reasons," she said in her defense. "I've told you more than I've already told anyone, but this is the reason why I never told anybody. Because this is the look they'd give me. One of weakness. As if I'm small and-"

"You are small," he said in a hard voice, staring at her frame briefly. "Lied about your height as well?"

She swallowed and looked away.

"I'm not going to _examine_ you, America. Just wondering, how tall are you? The army requires women to be at least 5'0 feet."

"I am 5'0 feet...almost. I wore shoes with some heels to gain an inch."

"To gain an inch, huh? So you're 4'9 feet? Plus you're four years too young to fight this war?"

"They're just rules, created because the law wants a set of pointless rules," she muttered. "Besides, I had my reasons."

"Yes, you told me you had reasons. And I have no interest in knowing what they are."

Her mouth was still open to continue _their_ war, until she realized that he put it to a rest.

"It's my hair, I suppose. I used to have hair until my waist. But I cut it off."

"Trying to become a boy?" he asked in mock, his lips pursed.

She gave him an angry shove.

" _No_. They say short hair makes you look older. It worked, did it not?"

"Certainly. Well, I respect your honesty, America. You could've chosen to lie. Danke."

"Your welcome," she muttered. "Bitschn."

He laughed and Alice flinched. There she did it again, making a fool of herself.

"It's _bitte schön_ ," he said slowly.

"That's what I said. Bitt shin."

" _Not quite_. They're two words. _Bitte_ and _schön_."

"Bitte shin."

"Not _shin_. _Schön._ You need to purse your lips."

"Sheen."

His hand came up, holding her chin.

"Shön. Lips pursed. Like you're trying to kiss a guy."

She didn't dare and say it again. She was staring at him wide eyed. Especially now that he touched her.

For a moment, she thought he was going to kiss her.

He didn't.

Of course he wouldn't kiss a girl ten years younger than him.


	30. Chapter 30

**_Chapter Thirty_**

"We're almost out of Berlin. I made calls to my friend, but he's not picking up his phone."

"Is he alright?"

"I don't know, but we can't wait for him. You can still rest for a few hours."

"I'm up for a walk until we're out of this target zone," she said. "Rather now then later."

She checked her medical supplies. Still plenty of gauze, tape, band-aids and disinfectant. Her morphine and needles were all used up. The last items she also had enough of were suture needles and thread. Having those was very useless, because she was uncertain anyone would want sutures without the anesthesia.

"Why did you refuse the morfine?" she asked with a scowl. "It was unexpected to refuse it."

"I did not trust you. For all I knew, you would inject poison inside me."

"Uh...well, perhaps the first time we met. What about yesterday? You refused the morfine again. O-Oh...silly me. You still didn't trust me."

"By then I did trust you. I wanted you to save it. In case you got injured and needed it. Guess I lost that battle. Have you got any painkillers left?"

"Why? Do you need any?"

She went to check her bag, making sure she looked inside all pockets. Perhaps she'd missed some aspirins somewhere.

"No, silly girl," he said, mimicking her own words. "I meant for you, in case you need them."

Her hands stopped moving and she felt strangely warm for being thought of.

"I haven't got anything left," she admitted. "Let's just hope nothing horrible happens."

"You're allowed to stay optimistic. I cannot. Once we're out this cottage, I'm a soldier again."

"Yes, I understand."

"So I apologize beforehand if I cause you any harm. It's only because I'm trying to protect you."

"Yes, I get it."

"Ready to go?"

She nodded as she put on the Nazi coat and her backpack.

The air outside was damp but much fresher than the air inside. She took a deep breath and followed Jasper. It was still dark outside, and it would remain dark for a few more hours.

She did not like being outside, so close to danger. Not that she thought it was very safe inside, for a bomb could easily destroy the entire cottage at once. But still, a roof over one's head still made a difference. She only had a dark sky above her head with faint stars. The dust made the sky very grey. It was an immediate result of the war, such dreary views. One day she hoped to see the stars shine brilliantly from perhaps a farm, where there were no city lights interfering with that shine.

The walk lasted for hours, when Jasper motioned to a fallen tree where they both sat on. He gave her one of those bars again and placed his canteen of water in between them.

"You haven't said a word," he told her. "Something wrong?"

She shrugged, taking a bite. Her stomach grumbled, but she did not feel hunger.

"May I...apologize? I shot your friends and I've been thinking for a while that I never even apologized to you."

Alice did not comment, to which Jasper gained courage to say, "I'm truly sorry for the tragic shooting. It was a brutal meeting and in a flash, you lost so much. Even your team."

"My team?" she said coldly. "They're alright. I'll see them after the war."

She knew she was too optimistic now, but she didn't like to show her weak side. Hearing his apology somehow saddened and angered her, so she tried to remain cool.

"You won't," he said. "We shot them. Six men, two women. That was your team, wasn't it?"

The air drew out of her body, leaving her breathless.

"I'm very sorry. They had their guns pointed at us and were about to shoot. We're trained to aim and shoot quicker."

Without her team, Alice was all alone. She had nobody left.

"And I'm sorry we shot Aro," she said monotonously. "Apparently, you're not trained to aim and shoot quicker than us."

She could not meet his gaze. Instead, she focused on finishing the bar, taking a sip of water and standing on her feet again before Jasper was even finished.

"Are you ready to go?" she snapped, not looking at him, because the atmosphere felt too tense.

"Yes," he said.

Obviously Alice was very hurt to find out so roughly that also her team was dead. All she now wanted was get out of the war as quick as possible.

Insomnia of a previous life was slowly killing her, but she wanted to stay strong for the man she once loved. It was his spirit keeping her upright in that moment. Without his love, she would tumble over and never get off the ground. Then soon she'd die of a natural cause or somebody would kill her.

She would stay strong for her Jacob.

"Wait," he said, his eyes up in the sky.

Then Alice heard it too.

"Duck," he said, dragging her with him on the ground beside a tree.

She shut her eyes tightly, wondering if the bombers were up there. The idea of being killed beside a killer seemed appalling.

"Nein, fick..." he hissed, his voice frustrated. "I thought it's my friend, but it's not. We've been spotted."

"W-What do y-you mean?" she asked, looking up to see a helicopter starting to descend. "I don't...d-don't want t-to be t-t-tortured."

He hushed her.

"Shoot me," she begged, taking hold of her thick coat.

His eyes came down to hers, watching her darkly.

"Please?" she whispered, tears gathering in her eyes.

"No," he snapped, looking up again.

Three Nazi's were staring down on them from quite a distance, their guns ready to shoot. They were probably checking whom they were up against with.

Jasper started waving at them and Alice wanted to scream at him to stop doing that.

"I'm gonna die anyway," she said.

"It's a risk you took when you joined war."

"Then give me the gun and I'll do it myself."

He took hold of her upper arms and shook her once.

"Stop it," he snapped. "I thought you promised me not to act suicidal again."

"That's before I knew you and your kind killed everyone I ever knew. You left me with _nothing_! I still have the poison. I'll take the poison."

"It was to kill or get killed. Getting killed is not an option for me. And you already figured out why."

She watched him in surprise, never saw it coming that he'd admit that was on one some importation mission.

"I'm gonna die anyway," she said only this time, she meant to ask also what the use was for her to stay alive at this point.

She was going to get captured.

"Trust me. Nod when I nod. Shake your head when I shake mine. And don't speak. No English, no German, nothing. Can you do that for me?"

Her lips parted, still a thousand questions in her head.

"Don't do this to me, sweet Alice. I need you. Your death is not something that is going to happen to me."

She shook her head, not understanding, but the helicopter was very close now.

"Do I keep this on?" she whispered, pointing at the coat with the swastika emblem on the sleeve.

"Yes. You're a Nazi now."


	31. Chapter 31

**_Chapter Thirty-One_**

Alice couldn't do this. She wasn't strong enough, mentally, physically, she really wasn't. She stood frozen. Jasper brought his hands to her waist and squeezed her hard, until she gasped from the pain.

"Don't go into shock, America," he snapped. "Stop looking afraid. They'll figure it out."

"I c-can't do t-this," she said, shaking her head. "I-I'll blow y-your cover. I'm s-s-sorry."

"Why did come here?" he asked. "Why did you come here at the age of fifteen? Not to die and give up, I presume."

She didn't want to think about that now. But it reminded her of her lost life in America.

"Tell me, do you trust me or not?"

It didn't matter whether she did, because her shaking frame would really blow his cover.

"Alice," he said sharply, holding each side of her head gently. "Look at me."

Tears fell from her eyes when she looked into his green eyes.

"I'm going to kiss you now."

"Wha-"

His lips crashed into hers hard. It was brief, firm, but enough to divert her mind from all danger around her.

"Good girl," he muttered when he noticed her.

His hand went to her thighs and he started feeling around. She looked at him with large eyes. Until she felt him squeeze the bottle with poison against her thigh. He looked satisfied when he felt it, still in her possession and within close reach.

"Just in case, remember?"

Jasper kissed her. Her first kiss.

The helicopter was now very close to them and Alice did no longer dare to speak, afraid they might catch her English words.

Jasper turned around to the helicopter, his hand before his eyes to prevent the flying sand and dirt fly into them.

Alice couldn't have been bothered with doing that. She was about to get face to face with at least four actual Nazi's. The three that sat on the edge and the one that was flying the thing.

"Adam!" one of them called. "Wie geht's? Wo bist du gewesen?"

"Ich hätte etwas gehört und hat dieser liebe Mädchen gefunden. Du weißt was ich meine, nichts?"

He was grinning at them and Alice's heart froze. He seemed to be part of them. It confused Alice's seventeen year old brain so much.

"Also..." a different one said, stepping out. "Teilst du mit deine Kameraden?"

"Nein," Jasper said. "Sie ist meines."

"Ist das so? And was sagt das Mädchen davon? Eh, schönes?"

He was staring at Alice directly. He was speaking to her.

"Sie kann nicht sprechen," Jasper said. "Stumm."

The men watched Alice like a hawk. She tried to keep her face hard and that wasn't difficult if she kept re-imaging the dead bodies of her friends.

"Darfen wir nicht jetz gehen?" Jasper asked with a casual shrug.

"Ja," they agreed, getting back on the helicopter.

Jasper followed them and quickly tilted his head, mentioning to follow him.

She was walking slowly behind the Nazi's. And Jasper.

The first Nazi went in, then the second, the third.

Jasper also went in and Alice froze. Before she could think, his hand appeared. He looked at her with a hard face, waiting until she took his hand.

"Komm, Anna," he said.

 _Come...Anna?_

She chose not to think, but take his large hand and do as he told. He hoisted her up and she stepped into the helicopter with a wild heartbeat. The helicopter was loud. It didn't make Alice feel any less in the presence of Nazi. She was glad the Nazi paid her little attention, but she was very unnerved, because they spoke fast German and Alice couldn't make it any words. Therefor it was easier for her to just block them out.

Jasper was speaking easily with them, but he sat closest to her. She didn't even know if that comforted her or not. Nothing could quite comfort her, unless they all jumped up all of a sudden to say they weren't real Nazi. That, of course, was not going to happen. This was the real deal.

She almost jumped when she felt a soft touch at the small of her back. Her head snapped to her side. Jasper was still speaking with the men, only she noticed that he'd leaned back, his arm behind her. His hand however was on her back, almost caressing her.

"Was ist loss?" one of the men asked harshly.

"Nichts," Jasper said in a casual tone.

He grunted and Alice tensed. What were they saying and why did Alice feel in more danger?

"Anna?" he asked, turning his head to her. "Du bist einen Schwester. Ja?"

He nodded once curtly and she followed the movement.

"Sie kan arbeiten in das Krankenhaus."

The men shrugged and agreed on something.

"Aber sie kann nicht sprechen," one of them said.

"Sie kann hören. Sie ist nicht dumm."

"Okay," one of them said.

Suddenly one of them yelled and pointed down.

"Zeit für action. Komm hier, Adam. Bringe hier deine Mädchen."

Jasper got on his feet and pulled Alice up by her upper arm. Her eyes were questioningly watching his, but his face was hard. They threw a large, military gun into Jasper's arms and he caught it with both hands.

That's when Alice saw, yards and yards above the helicopter, a camp. Several American's were running quickly. They must've seen the helicopter.

"Jetzt!" the largest one called.

And shots deafened Alice. Her fellow Americans were falling on the ground, one by one.

Jasper raised the gun and went to stand next to them. He started shooting with them. Alice glared at the man and almost cried when she only saw death and blood. She couldn't believe that it were his lips that touched hers, just minutes ago. Now his finger was pulling a trigger and killing fellow Americans.

The helicopter descended and Alice needed to put all effort into her trembling. She needed to stop look afraid, horrified, shocked.

Jasper glanced back once, quickly, his eyes dark and emotionless. He was a robot. Like a button, he'd changed himself. He shut off his emotions.

Alice wondered what his secret was.

The rest was laughing, enjoying themselves.

The helicopter moved hard, as it landed on the ground. It stood between a mascaraed of bodies. Jasper waved his head to her, then jumped out of the helicopter. She got out with a sick feeling to her stomach.

The other Nazi men went to each body, and put a bullet in their heads. Even if they were already dead. Jasper did the same, only twice. He kept glancing over at Alice more and more. She was staring at him in her own hard face with lips glued on each other too tightly. She felt like screaming. Her eyes tried to avoid the bodies. She did however see how the Nazi's acted like wild monsters.

Slowly, Alice retreated. The Nazi had left guns in the helicopter. She didn't want to kill herself.

She needed to kill a Nazi.


	32. Chapter 32

**_Chapter Thirty-Two_**

She jumped in the helicopter, nobody even paying her attention. Except Jasper, his confused eyes watching her.

Once inside, she picked up a gun and heard someone talking. She almost wet herself, when she realized it was just the pilot.

It was loaded, she saw. And the safety pin was already off.

She walked to the pilot and he turned his head when he heard her.

"Was?" he said harshly.

"I'll see you in Hell," she said, raising the gun to his nose and shooting once.

His head snapped back and blood splashed everywhere. It also came on her face, to her greatest disgust.

He was dead and she stood frozen in that position.

It was supposed to make her feel better. Instead, she felt sick to her core.

"Alice!" a loud, angry roar called from outside.

Then, very quick, more shots were fired. She was going to die soon, she knew that. Jasper was probably dead by now. Her arms went weak and she turned, slowly raising her arms again.

She could kill another Nazi. It didn't make her feel better. But it did make the world a better place. She would take one more, before they took her.

Waiting, waiting, waiting to take one more life. Her shoulders were tense. But she stepped forward. She wasn't a professional. She couldn't aim. The better the shot, the closer the distance.

Someone jumped inside and she shot, but the man had somehow been quicker. He'd crashed into her body and caused her aim to be to the sky.

They fell on the floor of the plane together. Jasper's body pressed hers tightly and she felt how he yanked the gun away from her hand. That didn't prove to be very hard since her grip on it had been slack in the first place.

"Trying to kill me now, Alice?" he asked in a breathy voice, leaning down to sit on her upper legs.

"Jasper," she whispered. "Where are the Nazi's?"

"Dead."

"I thought... I thought they killed you. I thought you were dead."

"No," he said. "I heard a shot and I thought you killed yourself."

"No, no, no," she whispered. "I think I lost it. I killed the pilot."

She looked up at him, a little afraid.

"I'm sorry I endangered your life," she said quietly.

He stared at her, never moving away from her.

"You killed the pilot?" he asked.

She nodded.

"We have a helicopter for our own?"

"Uh...I'm not sure what that means?"

He leaned down and she expected a kiss. It was insanity.

Except, he didn't kiss her. He'd only leaned forward to watch her even more closely.

"You didn't endanger my life," he said. "You saved it."

"But you screamed my name when you heard the shot. That blew your cover. Our cover."

"I didn't care then. I thought you were dead."

She didn't understand the big deal.

"You killed them all," she said in surprise. "All those shots I heard, that was _you_ killing _three_ Nazi's. If you knew you're fast, why didn't you shoot them all before."

It would've saved Alice a lot heartache and confusion from killing the pilot herself.

"That wasn't an option," he said with an angry scoff. "You were with us the entire time. Innocent and unarmed. One of them would have shot you dead if I started fire. It wasn't a risk I was willing to take."

She gasped at that declaration.

"When I thought you were dead, I didn't have you to lose anymore."

She nodded, but also looked away awkwardly. He confessed something very strange. If it weren't for her, Jasper would've killed all the Nazi men easily. Except, with her on his side, he couldn't take the risk of getting her shot.

"You're face..." he said, wiping at her cheeks with his fingers. "Have you ever killed someone before? How are you feeling?"

"Why did you _kiss_ me?" she asked desperately instead.

He only hesitated for a moment, before he said, "It was the only way I could think of to get you out of your shock. I'm sorry for that, by the way. And for squeezing your waist."

So that kiss, it was just part of his plan to get her out of her shock. Of course that was the reason. Than why did Alice feel so terrible?

"We're going to leave now," he said. "By flying this helicopter."

"Oh," she mumbled. "Yeah, smart idea. It's a good thing you know how to fly it."

"Are you a quick learner?" he asked, getting up slowly, with movement that didn't fit him.

She choked when she saw a blood on his chest. Quickly she scrambled up on her feet.

"I thought they didn't shoot you!" she accused desperately.

"So did I."

She wanted to check to wound, but he shook his head.

"It's time to go, before we miss our chance. Take your seat."

"I can't," she muttered.

She shivered when she thought of that body, still there in the seat. Jasper noticed and went to the seat.

"Look away," he said.

Alice turned her back to him. She heard huffs and puffs coming from Jasper and a loud thud when he probably dropped the body on the ground. She heard movements, walking and than one more loud thud. Probably from throwing the body out of the helicopter.

"Take your seat," he repeated.

She turned and looked in shock at the blood trail from the chair to the open door.

Reluctantly, she walked to the seat and sat awkwardly. Blood and skin was covering all the buttons.

He sat next to her.

"That stick has to be between your legs," he said.

"Uh...what?" she muttered, squeezing her left leg between the seat and the stick until her legs were apart with the stick in between.

"This stick is basically how you fly the helicopter. It's a sensitive tool. Compare it to your legs. It directs the helicopter."

No, they weren't really going to do this. Alice had never done something so big before.

"Place your feet on the tail rotors," he said, pointing down.

She put her feet gently on them, without pushing.

"Press the left one if you want the nose to go left, right if you want it to go right."

She shook her head.

"You raise and lower the helicopter with the collective control on your left."

"Maybe we should walk."

"I'm with you as we take off," he said. "Once we're up, it's easy. That is all."

He placed his hand on her right one and put it on the stick. The only reason it remained on the stick, was because his hand kept hers there.

"Pull the lever up, with your left hand."

"I can't," she said, shaking her head.

She placed her hand on it, seriously doubting she would actually do this. She accidentally pulled the stick closer to her and the entire chopper moved a little.

"The stick is sensitive," he said. "No need to give it hard yanks."

She wasn't yanking on it. She was trembling and nervous, her movements automatically became robotic.

"Sorry," he said quickly. "You're frightened. I'm glad that you are."

She swallowed thickly and turned her head to him. He saw her confused eyes. His own were actually showing hope.

"Being afraid means you still have something to lose. I know I've taken everything you had. But I'm glad you found something, whatever it is, to give you newfound reason not to want to die anymore."

That wasn't true. Alice hadn't found anything. Except Jasper. But she was uncertain if that was a good thing.


	33. Chapter 33

**_Chapter Thirty-Three  
_** **Sound the Bugle - Bryan Adams**

"Try to relax," he said. "You're doing good."

They were up in the sky, and she was riding it.

"Keep on going."

While she was flying the helicopter, he was searching in his bag and pulled out a black machine. It's meaning was foreign to her. Jasper quickly explained.

"It's a navigation system, so it shows us where other people are on a range of a few miles. If it picks warmth, you'll see a red dot. Avoid those."

She nodded.

A soft, hum came from her right. She didn't dare move her head to see what it was. The hum turned into words.

 _"Please have snow and mistletoe, and presents under the tree."_

Her eyes widened and she dared herself to turn. She saw a little radio in between them, soft music filling the space between them.

 _"Christmas Eve will find me, where the love light beams. I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams."_

Even though Christmas was over, Alice thought of next year.

 _25th of December 1946._

She imagined herself being still in this war. And the next year, the one after that. Until who knew how long.

This song depressed her, reminding her of a never ending war.

"Don't cry, America."

She sniffed quickly, but not daring to move her right hand from the stick or her left hand from the collective control.

"I can turn it off."

But without her consent to turn it off, Jasper didn't dare to do it. What if something else had upset her?

He sighed loudly.

"I've been trying to find a signal for the past few days," he admitted. "Each time, no avail. No music. And now, way up in the sky, the radio finds a signal."

"Oh."

"What a coincidence, right?"

 _"If only in my dreams. If only in my dreams."_

The song came to an end.

"I like the song," she said honestly.

"I like that song too," he admitted.

"It's just the war, is all. I wish it would end. It's only caused misery, heartache and killings. I never expected such brutes, you know? Why does it feel like nobody's doing anything?"

"I do believe the end is nearing," he said.

"That's what I've been hearing for the past years now."

 _"You've seen him up and down the avenue. And now he's wearin' the navy blue. She had a tear in the corner of her eye. As he said his last goodbye. Shoo, shoo, shoo baby. Shoo, shoo, shoo baby. Bye, bye, bye baby. Do-dah do-day."_

Seeing was very hard. Tears blinded her sight.

"I can't see," she muttered.

"Take a break," he said. "I'm watching."

"Thank you."

"Bitte. My friend can't come to Berlin. But he's close by. If we can get out of this city, he can get you out of here."

"Me?"

"Ja."

"Only me?"

"Ja."

"Not you?"

"Nein."

They'd been flying for over fifteen minutes now, and dodging those red dots wasn't easy. It helped her a lot that Jasper's hand was doing most of the steering work.

It did _not_ help her uneasy heart that his hand was on top of hers, while that was completely unnecessary. But he never offered if she wanted her hand back and she too much enjoyed having any physical contact in this lonely world. So if it were up to here, she wanted to prolong this moment.

"No need to stay in this war zone on my account," she said bitterly. "I've seen you shoot the Nazi, Americans and...my friends. You've admitted to killing the rest of my team as well. But I can't sue you for murder, can I? So why stay?"

She sneaked a glance at him. His eyes showed hurt at her words said so darkly. It didn't suit the normally hopeful young woman.

"You can't do your mission on your own," she continued.

"I cannot profit from the personal immunity which has been granted to me from America for prosecution."

Alice gasped at his confession that he had immunity and that America had given it to him, which made Jasper Whitlock indeed an American.

"I've taken innocent lives for the sake of a mission that's not yet even completed. I cannot return, or their deaths will have been in vein. Before I met you, I wouldn't have cared much, but now I do."

The words touched her deeply within her heart.

"I'll stay in Berlin to fight and win. Or I'll die trying."

"Good God... You really are the good guy."

"I'm not a good guy. I'm just a soldier."

A soldier, but also a good man.

"Do you think we're out of Berlin now?"

"I believe so," he said. "But as long as we have gasoline, it's best to keep flying."

She nodded.

"Are you tired?" he asked.

"No. Well, I'm always tired."

He hummed softly and for a few more songs, they didn't speak. A few German songs later, Alice sighed.

"I wish I understood the songs."

"I can teach you," he said.

Alice scoffed hard.

"Me. _Ich_. You. _Du_. He. _Er._ She. _Sie_. We. _Wir_."

"Ich, wir, sie," she mumbled.

"Ich bin Krank. I am ill."

"Why does the teaching involve war?"

"Fine. Ich liebe dich."

"And that means?"

"I love you."

Accidentally she pushed the stick between her hand too tightly, causing the plane to leap forward.

"Easy, Alice. It's alright."

He steadied her hand and the plane was back in it's original speed.

Was he teaching her the German phrase for I love you or telling her those three words? That wouldn't make sense though.

"Time to land," he said. "Not much gasoline left."

"Little help?" she asked.

"Bring your left hand down to slowly descend. I'll guide your right hand."

She nodded.

Her actions weren't shivery anymore. She seemed less afraid.

"Have you gotten more confident?" he asked strangely.

Or rather, in other words, asking Alice if she was gambling with her life again.

"No. I'm not suicidal again. But, I have you on my side."

She was afraid to look at him after she said that. His hand on hers held hers more tightly. The ground was almost beneath them now.

Slowly, gently, they landed. It was all his doing.

Yet he said, "You did very good."

"Danke," she said awkwardly, because each time she spoke German, she felt like that.

"Let me make a call to my friend. He might be close by."

She nodded in response.

They stayed seated in the warm helicopter as Jasper held the phone against his ear.

"Wo bist?" he asked. "Wirklich? Ja, das ist perfekt. Danke!"

He hung up the phone and brought his shining eyes to Alice.

"He's fifteen minutes away. Said this place is completely deserted."

She nodded.

"Alice," he said in a gentle, human voice. "You're safe now."

"I thought there's always a risk."

Just this time, Jasper was right. Alice was safe. Because only a few minutes later a helicopter landed close by them.

"Goodbye Alice. I'm sorry for hurting you. I wish things could have been differently between us."

He kissed her front head and stood up.

"You can't go," she said, shaking her head. "Not now. Not injured."

"I must finish what I came here to do."

The last that Alice saw of him was his running frame into the woods, where the trees grew thicker until she could no longer see him.

The helicopter was on the ground. One men had stepped out and ran to Alice, still sitting in the drivers seat.

"Alice Brandon?" he called in clear American English.

She nodded nervously.

"Time to go home."

 _Home_ , she thought sadly. She was going home without the ones she came here with.


	34. Chapter 34

**_Chapter Thirty-Four_**

The war ended that same year in which Alice was rescued. She was happy that they had stepped into that special year of 1945 but at the same time her heart crushed that they'd died so close before the end of the war.

To be exact, the war ended on September the 2th. Few months before that, the newspapers were filled with promising news, for many countries were free before that date. As each time another country was set free, the end came nearer.

It was on exactly that date when the war came officially to an end that Alice could say her dream came true. The war which she'd fought also was finally over and all survivors could come back home.

The end of the war was celebrated world wide with cheers, kisses, hugs and words that had been left unsaid. Alice witnessed a great deal of this joy during her fulltime function at a hospital. Her career as a nurse suited her well and she took great pleasure in helping patients with their basic needs.

Her work colleagues were very distant of Alice, probably because she wasn't even eighteen yet. Her lie had been out on the table when she'd come back to America. Now she was forced to live with foster home, for she had not yet reached the adult age. The home wasn't a bad place to be. Most children were much younger than herself, but they all shared one thing in common in that home. They were all orphans.

Alice had plans for December the 25th. Not her birthday per se, but the moment she'd have a mature age. Already she'd found a small place, in which she planned to live on her own. When that day came, it was rough in the beginning. She had little money, but managed fine with little food and not so many clothes. She was already happy that she had her own independence, her own job and her own - however little it may be - money, clothes and basic supplies.

In an alternate life, she would be married now and living together with her husband. Instead, she more felt like a widow. Some days were cruel, very cruel. She'd wake up screaming from bad dreams. Her body would be drenched in sweet. Some days, she couldn't get out of bed, but eventually forced herself, so she would get to work. On those days, she was very distracted and scared she might not fulfill her tasks at the hospital correctly.

The war damaged Alice and she never thought of seeking help. There were doctors and psychiatrist, of course. But they cost money. Also she couldn't imagine what the use would be to speak to someone who hadn't been through what she'd been through.

Perhaps Jasper had been right about one thing. War was not meant for children. Whom was war meant for then? Adults? Men? Strong people, like Jasper? Was there ever the right kind of person who was meant to fight a war?

She didn't expect to ever see that man again. He'd chosen to remain in war and she'd never received clearly from him where he lived. The war in Berlin had been so horrible during that time that Alice wondered if he even made it out alive while still recovering from an infected gunshot wound. Not to forget the new gunshot wound that happened to him right before they flew in the helicopter

Time had a funny way of passing by. Three years later, at 21, she lived an isolated life, except for her job where she met the kindest patients whom would all usually comment on her height. Many also asked her about her hair. After the war, she left it short. It was difficult at first, but she bought a pair of sharp scissors and cut it herself every month. After a few times, she'd become very handy with the process and not having the need to go the a hairdresser saved her money.

It was four years after the war when Alice first had a nightmare about Jasper. She'd dreamed that he died in the war and that his loss mattered. Upon waking up, she was gasping hard as she was able to still remember the exact shade of green that his eyes were. Or that honey blonde hair with a slight wave to it. And the way he spoke German and English.

Also on that same day as the nightmare she received a letter. Exactly on September the 2th 1949 she held a letter in her hand with the American Army emblem on the front of the enveloppe. She ripped it open nervously to see what it read. A thousand thoughts ran in her mind. Mostly she was scared that they'd want to sue her for lying to the system.

On top of the letter, she saw the following in big letters.

IN HONOR OF YOUR SERVICE TO OUR COUNTRY

 _Dear Mary Alice Brandon,_

 _We have sent you this letter in honor of your service to America. You have served our country as a nurse, making personal sacrifices to our country._ _We are hosting an event in honor of all who have served America during the war._ _Hereby we'd like for you to join this event on September the 2th._

Alice stared at the letter in horror.

" _Today_?" she asked out loud.

She looked in the corner of the letter and noticed it had been sent a week ago. Last night after her shift, she had no post. So the letter had quite the delay.

"Today..." she repeated.

It was Friday in the afternoon after her shift when she found this letter. She'd worked since three in the night until one in the afternoon. She'd only just come home in her nursery clothes, but if she took a train now, she could make it on time to...

 _Texas._

The city where they were hosting the event.


	35. Chapter 35

**_Chapter Thirty-Five_**

Perhaps she'd meet Jasper again. Perhaps...

With a small backpack and a thin, light brown coat, she went to the trainstation. It was a four hour ride to Texas City but she had a feeling that Jasper would be there. She did not know why she would want to see him if he was there. All she knew was that she did.

She'd brought with her a novel and for the upcoming hours she buried herself in Daddy-Long-Legs. She was a slow reader and stopped very often to gaze into the distance at the beautiful hills. This train ticket cost her very much money, but she'd been saving and allowed herself this little fun without worrying about the costs.

By the time they reached Texas, she'd only reached half of the book. However, that gave her the other half for the way back, so it wasn't really so bad. She went out the train and stepped to the first person she saw that seemed friendly enough to want to help her.

"Excuse me, I was hoping if you could tell me where this address is."

She showed the man the letter, on which the address was written on the bottom.

"Ah, yes, it's a tiny bit further away from this station," he said.

His accent instantly brought Alice back four year ago, when she'd spent only three days with Jasper.

"Once you get out, cross the street and walk until the first roundabout. There, turn to the left until the end of the street. You'll find that address on your right hand."

"Thank you so much," Alice said with a smile.

"Just a ten minute walk," he added, waving her goodbye.

"Thanks!" she called, waving as well and following the given directions.

She was an hour late, but according to the invitation, the event would last until eight o'clock. It was almost seven now, so she could still enjoy the event for an hour. She was starving from not having eaten any lunch and the long train ride. During her walk, she bought a take away tea and added two sugars. She thought she could survive one more hour without anything to eat. Besides, she never liked to rush down her food. On her way back home, she'd have much more time in the train to eat more peacefully.

The walk was indeed just ten minutes and the doors were luckily open. She noticed inside many people, some of whom were wearing their military clothes. She walked in quietly and thanked her small frame for not being noticeable so much.

It was not that she didn't want to be seen, but she felt shame for her lies. Her co-workers had often given her filthy looks and it was now deeply enrooted in Alice that her lie was disgusting to the outer world.

She walked around the room slowly, glancing at the people talking to each other. She knew none of them, obviously. Her entire team was dead after all and she'd never had the privilege of meeting the others.

For an hour, she walked, she searched, she sipped her tea. There was no sign of Jasper and most of the crowd had gone home.

She sat on a chair tiredly and sadness washed upon her.

"What's wrong?" a voice asked from behind her.

The person appeared next to her and sat beside her on a chair. He was an older man, in his forties. His hair was dark with a few gray bits. His body was lean and his face very friendly, with dark eyes.

"The war," Alice answered.

He nodded sadly.

"Stays in here," he said, tapping his chest, "doesn't it?"

"It sure does," she muttered.

"Did you meet any of your old friends?" he asked as if to make the mood a little lighter.

Alice was not the kind to sugar coat a story.

"All my friends died in the war. There's only one other person whom I've spent some time with in the war, but I don't know if he's even alive or not."

"Was he an American?"

"I think so."

He scowled at her strangely, which was understandable. It was after all not common to not know the nationality of a person you spent time with.

"What's his name? We have a list of all survivors and fallen ones."

She froze, suddenly not so certain if she wanted to know if Jasper was dead. But another power reminded her that it was best to know than forever doubt.

"Jasper Whitlock," she said.

The mans eyes widened and his mouth opened widely.

"My dear! Where have you been? Jasper Whitlock is very much alive, indeed!"

She drew in a breath and felt like a heavy weight was lifted off her shoulders. His tone allowed her to bring forth the next question.

"Oh? Is that like...common knowledge...I mean, you did ask me where I've been, as if I've been living beneath a rock."

"Do not feel bad!" he exclaimed. "He was such an important man and I always find myself shocked when somebody asks about Jasper Withlock. Was he a friend of yours? A lover, perhaps?"

"Oh, no, no! He was...an acquaintance."

Alice brought her eyes down as she understood that this man thought Alice was a person left behind during war. Of course he didn't think she'd actually been in the war as well.

"Was he here tonight?" she asked carefully.

"No, my dear," said the man sadly. "He's been awarded so many prizes but he never comes to claim what is truly his."

"Prizes?" Alice asks in surprise.

"Oh, my dear! You really do not know... I shall tell you then, but first, let me introduce myself to you. I am Jason Jenks."

He extended his hand, which Alice took.

"Alice Brandon," she said.

"Nice to meet you, Alice. I helped Jasper, Aro, Caius and Marcus with one very important mission."

She shut her eyes briefly. Aro, Caius and Marcus were names Jasper mentioned as well.

"Berlin, as you may know, was heavily targeted in the beginning of '45. Every day, certain areas would get the flow blast. It was the task of Jasper, Aro, Caius and Marcus to find out these locations, report them back to us so we could bring people who still lived there in safety. At the same time, we knew when the choppers would be gone and where the choppers would drop the bombs. This extra information was crucial to sooner stop the attacks in Berlin and get the citizen there to safety."

"That sounds like a big task for four men."

"Yes, it appeared so," he said in yet again a sad tone. "Aro, Caius and Marcus were killed. Jasper managed to stay in Berlin until May, the last day the bombs were thrown. He reported to us very well when the attacks would be and we Americans went there to ambush the Nazi. It was a very successful mission. If it weren't for him, Berlin wouldn't have been freed so quickly."

Jasper Withlock was a hero.


	36. Chapter 36

**_Chapter Thirty-Six_**

Alice swallowed nervously.

"Were there many men with such tasks?"

"Barely any," he instantly said. "It requires perfect condition and straight to the point thinking. Distractions will not help. There are strict rules for people to be granted these tasks."

"Because they also receive immunity, is it not?"

"Certainty, that too. But during war, you can't let your feelings get in the way. I know Jasper's gone through a great deal of pain. Great deal indeed. But he's not the same again. I don't think he'll ever truly recover."

Alice stood up. She needed to see that to believe that.

"So, where is he now?" she asked. "I'd like to meet him again. Do you know his address?"

He wrote down on a piece of paper an address.

"He goes there occasionally."

Alice scowled at the strange choice of words.

"What do you mean, occasionally? Doesn't he live here?"

"Sometimes he's there, yes. But he doesn't have a true home. He chose for a life on the streets."

"But how do you know all this?"

"He came by only once. We awarded him The Purple Heart. He didn't accept it. After that, he never came back. It might have offended him, I believe."

"What's that, The Purple Heart?"

"A military medal awarded to those who are wounded or killed while serving."

She nodded a little. Her eyes were on the paper, memorizing the address.

"Is this close by?" she asked.

"Not exactly. You need to take a bus. Thirty minutes ride."

"Where's the busstop?"

"Why do you want to see him?"

"Is there ever a reason needed when somebody wants to meet up with another person?"

"I suppose you are right."

"Do you still have that...Purple Heart medal? I'd like to give it to him anyway, whether it offends him or not."

He nodded, walking her to a different room. There was a closet filled with all kinds of awards. So many were actual gold or silver.

"Here it is," he said, taking out a purple heart shaped medal.

"Thank you so much," she said, accepting it carefully. "If I don't find him, I'll be sure to return it to you."

But instead he shook his head.

"You're his friend. Keep it."

"Oh...Thank you."

"If you find him, tell him to come collect all of his awards. He might not want them, but, well, he could choose to sell them for money and find himself a real place to stay."

He was gazing into the glass and Alice stared at them with wide eyes now.

"You don't mean to say that this everything belongs to him?"

He nodded.

Even if Jasper didn't want them, he could sell them and live in a house instead of the streets.

She found the busstation fairly easily and waited until the bus would arrive. Eventually it was half past nine when it came. She showed the written address to the bus driver.

"Do you know this address?"

He nodded.

"Can you stop at the busstop closest to there?"

He nodded.

"Thank you."

He only nodded again.

For half an hour, Alice stared out the window in the fairly empty bus to the houses they passed. Texas was a nice city, but as the bus rode further, they reached darker parts of the city. She did not like the idea of having to have to walk there alone, in the dark.

She tried to not think so much of Jasper and the fact that he lived on the streets. She tried not to, because it truly saddened her.

"This one, lady," the bus driver called, to which Alice instantly rose.

"Thank you," she called. "Is it close by?"

"Walk this street out. The shelter'll be on your left hand. Can't miss it."

"Thanks," she called before stepping out the bus.

It'd also been a fairly expensive bus ride for a man who might not even be at the place she was heading to.

She hoped it was worth it.

Alice walked quickly, in long strides. She almost ran actually. The sooner she got there, the better. She didn't like the dark streets and uncrowded area. It frightened her.

She made it to the shelter safely. Softly, she thanked her God for not letting any funny business come her way.

"Hello?" she asked to the first person she saw in the shelter.

He ignored her and walked on.

"Hi," she said to a young lady, but she also ignored her.

Alice walked inside the large room slowly, hoping to see a somewhat professional. All the strays seemed to ignore her.

"I'll give you a dollar if you hear me out," she said to the first passer by.

He instantly stopped and watched her in surprise.

"Is Jasper Withlock here? He's tall and has blonde hair."

He snatched her dollar from her hand and pointed toward a door. Instantly he disappeared. She walked to the door which he'd pointed and first knocked. When no answer came, she turned the handle slowly. The door opened, but with difficult, as if the person behind it had placed objects behind the door. She needed to put her shoulder and full body weight in the battle to open that door.

Suddenly the door slammed shut hard, causing Alice to bump her head on the door and trip on the ground. Her shoulders ached from the fall.

"Hey!" she called. "That's rude!"


	37. Chapter 37

**_Chapter Thirty-Seven_**

Within seconds, she heard movement behind the door and then it opened.

A man she barely recognized stood before her. Of course her was just as tall, but slightly slimmer. His hair seemed less healthy, missing that shine it once had. He seemed like he hadn't shaved in days, a light beard growing on his face.

Mostly she was caught of guard by his eyes, which were hard and void of emotion.

"Jasper?" she asked as if she needed verification.

Nothing in his demeanor changed.

"I'm sorry for disturbing you, but..."

She couldn't bring herself to speak when he looked at her like that, like she was nobody.

"I'm sorry," she concluded with a shake of her head. "I should not have come."

Her body turned and she walked away from the scene. She thought that war had changed _her._ She never thought of how much it could really change a person. Jasper was a different man.

"Then why did you?" he asked, his raw voice making its first appearance.

She glanced back briefly.

"I was in the neighborhood," she murmured.

"The _event_?"

She nodded.

"How have you come here?"

"I took the bus."

"You live in Texas?"

"No, I don't."

"Then where?"

"Houston."

"That's also a train ride."

"Yes, I took the train as well."

"I hope the event was worth such a trip. Goodbye."

"I _really_ didn't make the trip for the event. Goodbye."

She walked away but heard a shuffle behind her.

"What is it?" she asked when he appeared beside her with a large backpack.

"It's a bit of a walk to the bus stop, is it not? I'll walk with you."

"Oh, if you want, thanks," she said.

The first minute they were both quiet.

"Four years later and we're both alive," Alice first said.

Then the second minute of silence followed.

"I'm sorry to have disturbed your evening," she eventually said, staring straight ahead of her at the busstop.

"Of course."

The third minute went by when both said nothing and Alice was mortified.

She heard a beep. Her eyes widened, as now she wanted to die in mortification. The beep came from her wrist, as it was the watch she still wore every day. It's batteries were perfect, never having stopped once.

There was a second beep quickly after the first and she brought her confused gaze to where that sound came from.

His wrist. He also still wore the watch.

"Would you like it back?" she instantly asked, her hand already on her wrist to take off the watch.

His hand stopped her and her breathing hitched.

"Keep it. It's very little, after all. Besides, four years later and you still wear it? I wouldn't dare to take it from you if it's important to you."

She smiled gently as she raised her eyes to him. She was less embarrassed now that she knew that she wasn't the only one still wearing it.

"This thing saved my life that day," she said. "Your friend brought me to safety."

He nodded once.

"And you?" she asked quickly, for she saw the bus arriving.

"I'm safe," he only said.

"Are you really?" she insisted. "A life on the streets after serving for your country? Is that safety? Aren't you worthy of more?"

"Your bus arrived," he said stiffly, waving his hand so the bus driver would know he needed to stop.

"This can't be it," she breathed. "It can't end like this. There should be more."

"Go back to your friends, darlin'," he said, a smile which did not touch his eyes.

The bus stopped but Alice grabbed his arm hard. He turned his head in surprise.

" _What friends_?" she asked in a hard voice.

"In or out?" the bus driver called when he opened the door.

"In," Jasper called.

"I'm glad you said it," she agreed, dragging him with her into the bus.

She gave the driver ten dollars and pointed up two fingers to indicate she was paying for Jasper was well. He gave her back two dollars.

Jasper looked back in horror as the doors closed and the driver started the bus.

"Hey, I need to get out," he said.

"Don't listen to him," Alice told the bus driver. "He's just being silly."

She pulled him with her to the end of the bus and sat by the window. He sat down beside her and glared. She quickly looked outside in fear. She'd never seen him so angry.


	38. Chapter 38

**_Chapter Thirty-Eight_**

"I'm sorry," she offered.

"For dragging me into a bus and forcing me to the God damn station?"

Her eyes widened and she shook her head in disapproval.

"Don't curse God, please," she murmured.

"Go fuck your God, for all I care."

Her mouth dropped in shock and she watched him in disgust.

"Take that back!" she whisper-hissed back.

"What part?" he asked with raised eyebrows.

"Don't feign like you don't know!"

"And you shouldn't command people," he snapped back. "If I want to curse God, I will."

"Why?" she asked in a sudden much gentler voice.

"What has God ever done to me? Huh, Alice? Taken away my family. Taken away my friends. Taken away my fiancee. Taken away my home. I have _nothing._ Should I thank God for granting me with _nothing_?"

Her eyes watered and she quickly looked away from his hateful eyes.

"For you it's easy, of course, to thank God and never curse him. It's always easy when you already have it all."

"What makes you think I have it all?" she asked curiously.

He looked away and ignored her instead. Alice didn't push it and it was when they were almost at the bus station that he chose to speak.

"The look in your eyes. You still carry hope. Anyone who can hope is optimistic because they have it all. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get the fucking hell away from you and your little fantasy filled up head."

He got up and went to the exit of the bus. Alice followed him close behind and called to him before he'd disappear.

"Having it all and having hope are unrelated to one another. You once asked me why I joined the army and I refused to answer. But this is the answer."

She hated that she was speaking to his back.

"Mom and Dad died when I was still young. I don't remember them. I haven't even got a picture of them. My only family was Cynthia. She was my younger sister."

A pause caught Alice of guard, because speaking about this was much harder than she thought. In that moment, Jasper had turned around and stared at her with a hard scoff.

"Cynthia once stole a little food from the kitchen of the orphanage where we stayed. I told her to never do that, but I couldn't keep an eye on her at all times. When I was eight, they told me my seven year old sister had died from..."

She was doing her best to not choke in her breaths.

"From being wippt on her back so hard that she bled an awful lot...and shivered from cold, until death followed. I-I ran away, not accepting such treatment. I was born in Biloxi, Mississippi. The streets are very cold in the winter at night, but I made it. I survived one year on the streets. It happened that I was not the only child on the streets and together with a few others, we found another orphanage. A better one. I was very lucky. I stayed there until I was fifteen."

Alice's eyes were low but from the looks of Jasper's feet, he wasn't planning on going. Not yet, that is.

"I was very interested in the medicine field and all that I know is information that I've read out of books. I made a test for nursery school at fifteen and I got in despite my age. Because I knew most of the stuff already, I finished in one year instead of two and...I signed in for the Army Nurse Corpse. With a fake date of birth. But that you already knew."

When his feet moved, she quickly looked up.

"I met Jacob in the war. My only friends were in that war. And they're gone. When I came back to America, I was forced into an orphanage until December. Instantly when I turned eighteen, I found my own place to live. I work at a hospital, but the only people who treat me nicely are the patients. The word that I lied about my age spread like a fire and for some reason, nobody likes me because they now think I'm a liar in general. But I swear, I'm not. I only lied about certain things to get into the war. I needed an escape or some sign that there was something more than living a life with struggle. Alone."

He wasn't scowling at her anymore. He seemed to be truly listening to her.

"The last four years I spent alone on purpose," she said. "Not with friends or family, something I don't have. And I don't mind it, because I needed that alone time. The only thing I have left is my own place, my job and this."

She raised her right hand and showed him the watch.

"Which is directly connected to you. So, I think it's safe to say that I certainly do not have it all. I went into a world war and against all odds came back alive. That must have been for a reason. I do have hope, because hope gives me a good feeling. You know that, or else you would've stepped out of that bus after the first stop. Instead, you drove all the way to the station. Something inside you must still carry hope for you to do that. Think about it while saying loud and clear that you want to get the...hell...away from me. Okay?"

Yet, he didn't comment.

"There was a man, uhm...Jackson...Jerry..."

"Jason Jenks," Jasper interrupted with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm not good with names."

"I remember."

She looked away while she dug her hand in her pocket.

Then she handed him the medal.

"Well, take it."

He glanced at it once.

"I don't want that," he said.

"I wasn't asking you," she muttered with force.

And than she shoved it in his chest until his hand came up to take it.

That being said, she planned to leave.

She was not a quitter or a pessimist, but she did know when she was no longer welcome.


	39. Chapter 39

**_Chapter Thirty-Nine_**

Jasper stepped forward, causing her to look up more.

"I cannot get my hopes up," he said.

"You should always get your hopes up," she said.

"At what prize? I don't mean to exaggerate, but I've seen the darkest side of the war. I've been put in a dark place and then got out. I believed being tortured was the worst part of my life. The worst part is trying to find a way to live with all that I've seen, done and felt in that war."

He held up his hand and Alice carefully took it. She saw that his left hand missed the nails of his middle finger, his ring finger and pinkie. She was appalled to see that he'd gone through such pains.

"And this is not all," he said matter-of-factly, pulling his hand out of hers.

He pulled up his right sleeve to show her thick, horrid gashes of scars.

"There's more."

"Oh, God," she whispered. "I'm sorry for this."

"I have nothing left, except brutal memories, nightmares and a vague memory of a girl. She was too young and too little to be in that war. I took her friends, her team, her lover and left her with nothing. That is something I will need to learn to live with also."

She bit her lip which was trembling hard.

"I h-heard you did well on your mission and that with your help, the bombarding of Berlin stopped."

"At the cost of so many lives," he said with a nod.

"It was war," Alice said. "Anyone who chooses to step into it, accepts that a fall or two is very likely. I lost my friends, but I've taken great comfort that they didn't suffer and were not tortured by the real Nazi. Besides, you had a job and that's what you did. Successfully."

He rolled his eyes but that didn't hurt Alice. All the time, he'd shown very little emotion and a roll of the eyes was sarcasm. He felt _something._

"Before I go, I'd like to say thank you so much for your service," she said sincerely.

"I did what I had to do."

She looked up at him carefully.

"Can I...hug you goodbye?" she asked, raising her arms just a tiniest bit.

He brought his eyes to his own eye level where Alice couldn't see them properly.

He sighed in exasperation, but did bend down a little to bring his own arms around her shoulders. She raised her arms up high, stood on her toes and brought both arms around his neck. It forced him to bend down some more.

"You saved my life, more than once," she whispered. "I'll always have hope because I was given a second chance. So were you."

She didn't want to retreat yet. Being in his arms felt like being home. A safe place to be.

"I'll keep praying for you. As I've done every night. The past years. I'm going to thank him for seeing you again. Even if it was only for a little while."

She tried to retreat, but his arms around her did not allow her to.

"Jasper?" she gasped.

He didn't respond, but squeezed her tighter. Alice inhaled through her nose at the tight grip he had on her. She hadn't had such physical contact in forever and so she hugged him back.

"Come with me," she said with eyes closed.

"Hmm?"

"Leave Texas. Stay with me."

He laughed softly, only muttering, "Silly girl."

"I'm serious. I don't want to lose you again. I feel...connected to you, somehow. I found you so easily today. It almost seems meant to be."

He watched her skeptically.

"You look like a fairy tale and the fake promise of happily ever after."

She nodded sadly. Of course her idea to take him with her had been impulsive and he knew it.

"Can I stay with you?" she asked shyly.

"No."

"Oh...uhm, okay."

He leaned down and watched her in the eye.

"Aber, wenn das ist was dir glücklich macht."

Alice shifted her eyes, being reminded that he spoke indeed another language.

If she heard him correctly, he said something like; but if that makes you happy.

"Ja, das...werde...mir...or mich, uhm...happy, I mean glücklich macht. I mean machen. No, it's macht."

And there she went, making another fool of herself for her half German sentence with all those grammar errors.

Instead of finding it amusing, his eyebrows shot up.

"You learned German?"

"Uhm...well, I just..."

He steered his head, a new light shining in his eyes.

"Don't you have work tomorrow?" he asked.

"I have the weekend off."

He was staring at her.

"Uhm...what is it?"

"Nichts," he said, shaking his head. "Du bist schöner dann ich mir kan errineren."

"I'm not fluent," she said uncomfortable.

"Well, let's try that again, shall we? Du bist..."

"I am," she translated.

"Schöner dann ich..."

"Prettier than I..."

"Mir kann errineren."

She stared at him with wide eyes.

"You're more beautiful than I can remember," he said very slowly, stepping closer to me. "That's what I said."

"I haven't changed," she muttered uncomfortably.

He shrugged, saying, "Perhaps my mind is a little rusty. Sorry."

She felt her eyes widen even more.

"You seem smaller," he said.

"Perhaps you've grown bigger."

Which wasn't true, because he was slimmer. He smiled, watching her with a steer of the head.

"So am I...staying...with you?"

He nodded.

"Okay. Would you like to head back to the shelter?"

"We're not staying there."

"Oh, but, where else?"

"An inn. I know one."

"Won't that be expensive?"

"No," he said. "Don't worry. Are you tired?"

"Uhm, no?"

"Would you like to walk around a little?"

"Yeah. Sure."

They sat in a quiet coffeeshop, both a cup of hot tea before us.

"Why a life on the streets?" she blurted out.

"It's not bad."

"That's not an answer. You could claim all your prizes, sell them for a reasonable prize, then live on that money for the rest of your life."

"Thought crossed my mind."

She gave him an angry look.

"Then why haven't you?" she asked.

He shrugged.

"You deserve it," she said quietly. "If anyone does, you do."

He seemed indifferent.

"Am I bothering you?" she asked insecurely. "Because I can go. I don't want to be taking away your time."

"No," he said quickly, his worried eyes on hers. "Stay."


	40. Turn and Turn Again

**_Chapter Forty  
Turn and Turn Again - All Thieves_**

"Why?" she muttered.

"Weil ich dich liebe."

Her heart stopped. The words sounded different, but she was almost sure it meant what she thought it meant.

"Because-" he started, but now she interrupted him.

"-you love me?" she asked with incredulity.

He nodded slowly.

"Why did you never try and find me?"

He watched her in a strange way.

"What would you want from a wounded soldier?"

Her lips parted, but she was tongue tied.

"Let's go to the inn," she said after finishing the tea.

"Yes, of course," he said.

They walked in silence to a small building, but the reception held a very nice lady.

"Young love?" she asked.

Jasper laughed a little, putting his hand on the small of her back. Her body froze, though this touch was so much smaller than their previous hug.

"One room, please," he said.

They exchanged money for a key.

He handed her the key, as if she was the one who held all the power. Together they followed the direction she'd given her. First up the stairs, then the third door on the right. The hallway was very narrow, and the carpet on the floor was a simple black.

She found the door, room number 19. She pushed the key inside and turned to the left.

"Why didn't you correct her?" she asked, pushing the door open and stepping in.

"It was either that, or telling her I'm you're Dad. People in general don't like a man and a woman spending a night together while being unwed.

"Does this mean we can do the things that wedded people do?"

When he didn't answer, she turned to face him. He was standing in the open doorway and staring at her with surprised eyes.

"I didn't see that coming," he said eventually, throwing the door shut.

"Well," she said, her lips trembling. "Surprise?"

"Do you do this often?" he asked.

"What? God, no! Never."

The words had flown out and Alice looked away.

"I just know that..."

She heard him step forward, until he stood before her.

He took her chin and raised it up. She looked him in the eye.

"That what?" he asked.

"That I love you too."

"No, Alice, you really don't."

He started taking off his clothes. First his jacket. He threw it on the ground. Then his sweater, landing on top of his first clothing. Underneath he wore a sleeveless white shirt, which he also tore off.

He was fast to untie his belt, buttons, then push the top of his pants down. He left them on, but she saw what he was trying to show her.

Her eyes saw his chest, but she quickly looked away.

On his chest, from neck to the top of his underwear, there were deep, very visible scars. More scars covered the top of his legs.

"They're an ugly sight," he said, "and a constant reminder of the war."

She turned her eyes back to the scars. They were present, yes, but she never thought of them as ugly.

"I only see a brave soldier, wounded during war."

His face showed disbelief, as he also shook his head.

"That's all I see," she whispered.

"This will be a constant reminder of the war."

She stepped forward.

In her short life, Alice had lived on the streets when she was just a child, she'd joined the war and was captured by a Nazi. All that together didn't outweigh how nervous she felt right then.

She reached forward, before she could change her mind and pressed her finger against his lower abdomen. It's where several small scars started. They were less prominent, especially to the big one going from his right side to his left chest.

Her trembling finger followed the line.

"They don't bother me," she said.

"Then why are you shaking?"

She looked up when her finger was at his collarbone, where she found a few round scars.

"This is the closest I've ever been to a man."

Her hand went to a scar which she knew. It was the wound that she'd attended to. It was at his side, perhaps one, two inches tall.

She leaned down, placed a soft and quick kiss on his scar. As nervous as she was, she raised her eyes up to him. She inhaled sharply when she saw his were closed tightly, as if he was in pain.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

She was about to walk past him, mortified she caused such distress on the poor man.

"You didn't hurt me, Alice. You made me feel alive again."

He leaned down and pressed his lips against hers.

It was unexpectedly and perfect. It felt like everything made sense again.

Gently he released her lips.

"Would we go to hell?" she breathed.

He raised his eyebrows.

"If we made love?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Not if we're married."

"But we're not."

"No, we're not."

"So we would go to Hell, because we're not married?"

"I don't know," he said. "I don't care so much. I thought you were the firm believer."

She nodded.

"I am, but...God knows our time is limited, right? Especially ours."

"True."

"I mean, we went to war. We survived against all odds. Between all those deaths, we made it. Don't we deserve happiness without the fear of going to Hell?"

"No need to try and convince me."

"And, even if I went to Hell, would it really be so bad? At least I'd have known what it's like to be with the man that I love."

"If you're going to Hell, I'm coming with you."

He brought his pants up and buttoned it close. Alice watched how he stepped forward and took her hands in his.

"But what if...I could get pregnant, right? Then what would I do?"

"Marry me."

"Yeah, but I'm not so sure if I even want to get pregnant."

He shook his head and said, "I wasn't answering your question. I was proposing."

She stared at him in shock.

"Why?" she croaked.

"I like how you believe in God. Maybe it was your God that brought us together. If so, I don't want to interfere with such powers. I'll marry you."

He went down on one knee and looked up at her.

"That is, if you'll have me as your husband, Alice Brandon."

"Jasper..."

"I don't have a ring yet, but I'll get one for you as soon as I sell all the awards."

She watched him with a confused feeling in her chest.

"I'll marry you on one condition," she eventually said.

Jasper stared at her until she continued.

"I don't want you to sell The Purple Heart."

"What's so special about this one anyway?" he said, taking it from his pocket and staring at it like it was something meaningless.

"Because you served, while wounded. It's the thought it holds."

He got back up on his feet and sighed.

"Alright, Alice, I'll keep it," he said, despite pinning the medal on Alice's coat. "Why don't you hold unto it for me?"

"Are you sure?"

He nodded.

"Alice?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad you looked me up."

She smiled, remembering how it all started just a few hours ago.

"Do you want to go to church?"

"Church?" she asked, looking left and right as if it was in the room with them.

"I know a priest and a church. If you want, we could get married tonight."

"Sure," she said with wide eyes, partly liking the idea, partly freaking out.

But then a thought crossed her mind. It came to her briefly.

"How do you know a church and a priest?" she asked, voicing her confusion.

A small smile formed on Jasper's lips and that's when Alice knew that he had been lost, but he had never lost hope.

 _The End_

* * *

 **AN:** Thank you dear readers for the support, I hope you like the story :)


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